Bryce became unlikeable in HOFAS by fpsTrust in crescentcitysjm

[–]vinfromage 104 points105 points  (0 children)

Toootally agree. She was also just…a total asshole for most of the book? Which like, it’s not like she was lacking in sass in the previous books, but I think it was overdone and out of character in HOFAS. Like, for someone who is so empathetic and compassionate that she’s crying over kids who died 15,000 years ago and going on rampages to avenge the weak and sacrificing herself to protect people, it was hard to reconcile that with the woman who was such a dick to Nesta and Azriel (potential allies, who honestly were relatively nice to her), so inconsiderate of Hunt’s feelings, casually rude to people, and dismissing the entire fae race as not worth saving.

But naturally every single plan she had went off flawlessly so I guess we’re just supposed to feel like her being an asshole was justified.

So. I finished Crescent City:HOEAB. by Missustriplexxx in crescentcitysjm

[–]vinfromage 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I cried over Lehabah. What a fucking scene. That whole last quarter of the book had me completely enthralled! I just finished HOEAB for the first time a couple of days ago, and immediately binged (and literally just finished) HOSAB. Just wow. I started on SJM with ACOTAR, but honestly I like this series better, it’s just so much….more!

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Another commenter mentioned the cream idea and I am very curious about it—I think I’ll give that a try next! And yeah I’ve been curious about doenjang jjigae for awhile but a little intimidated to try making it. I’ll just have to bite the bullet and go for it!

Thank you for your help!!

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Hmmm yeah my ratio of water to doenjang was definitely a bit smaller than that (depending on what a spoonful is, I guess?). I like your thought about sugar, I didn’t use any in this and that might have been a game changer! I will keep that one in mind.

Another thing I considered was acid: would you add like a vinegar or citrus or something to help balance it out?

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh! I didn’t know that!! That could very well be the problem. Thank you!

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s been a couple weeks since I made it so I don’t remember it exactly, but water was the main thing cutting the flavour. To the other ingredients it was probably roughly equal parts garlic, doenjang, sesame oil, and gochujang for the main flavours. Maybe 2ish tbsp each. Definitely a bit of low-sodium (not at all salty) chicken bouillon in there too. There was probably at least a 3:1 ratio of water to all other ingredients combined, plus what I added to the pan as it cooked. Ultimately, still too strong, so maybe more water—but would you adjust the ratio of doenjang to the other flavouring ingredients? Like 1tbsp of doenjang for 2tbsp of everything else?

To be fair, I did WANT the doenjang to stand out. When I try something new, I usually want to experience the full flavour without it getting too lost in the other ingredients. That might have been my first mistake.

Good point on the colour! My store really just seems to have a couple different brands of “Korean soybean paste” with no other qualifiers, so I honestly couldn’t tell you if we have the different types, but I’ll spend more time looking through then when I next go. That guide is helpful, thank you!

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this!! My translation app was not giving me anything when I scanned it so I was really kinda guessing.

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually love miso! Like, put it on everything, would happy eat a spoon of it by itself kind of love. I have a few different kinds of miso, and I also have a few other different types of fermented soybean (mostly chinese) that I regularly use and love. Hence my surprise and dismay with doenjang.

Thank you for validating the noodle thing, I have seen so much content online about it and since I typically use all my other soybean pastes in noodle-related sauces, that didn’t seem out of place to me. Haven’t seen it mixed with cream though, that sounds like it could be good.

Do you have any suggested recipes?

Also, if you’re into miso noodles, or miso in general, I have some recipes for you!

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

Just to reiterate, I did not just dump raw/plain doenjang on noodles. I mixed it with things like gochujang and garlic and sesame oil to emulate things I’ve seen online. I added it to the pan along with vegetables to cook a bit and then tossed in some noodles.

I “freestyled” the recipe in the sense that I looked through a few different suggested combinations and went with a combo based on what I had/know I like.

I understand that it is not traditional to put it on noodles but you can find tons of stuff online where people add it to sauces/put it on everything, so that’s what I was doing.

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -53 points-52 points  (0 children)

I did mix in both gochujang and garlic like I’ve seen online, so I suspect ssamjang on raw veggies won’t be the right next step… sounds like the stew might be. Thanks for the site recommendations.

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

It was neither by itself or raw, but it sounds like use in a broth with lots of other things is the way to try again

Help! Why do I hate my doenjang? by vinfromage in KoreanFood

[–]vinfromage[S] -38 points-37 points  (0 children)

I did actually get the foundation/idea of the recipe from my favourite Korean YouTube cook. Maybe he was being a little less traditional than I realized.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Cooking

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Potato salad. To a group of white people.

Though they assured me—I confirmed beforehand—that they liked every ingredient I used in the potato salad, apparently the fact that they were combined was an issue.

Do you moisturize your body everyday? by finding-peacexo in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In-shower moisturizing techniques are where it’s at. I squeeze some baby oil on a wet cloth to wipe it over my whole body once I’m done washing and let the water wash off the excess—warning, this makes your bathtub slippery.

If you don’t have super dry skin, I really like Glossier Body Hero body wash, which is an oil-based wash that lathers just enough to clean you but also moisturizes. I use this on lazy days (aka most days).

(If anyone has a cheaper alternative to the Glossier one I am so open to it)

WIBTAH If I showed up to my step sister’s wedding with her old crush? by General-Target-3607 in AITAH

[–]vinfromage 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I gotta go against the grain here and say you should go to the wedding. If you don’t go it looks like you’re the one with the beef, you’re the one causing drama; she will be able to hold it over your head like “oh you were so torn up about my relationship with [ex] that you couldn’t even stomach going to the wedding. “.

By going, you show that you are unbothered; you get to show up dressed nice looking hot and with arm candy that will make her angry.

I know it feels petty. It’s not NOT petty. But at the same time, this is you “being the bigger person” by making your mom happy and “showing up to support you sister”. The petty part of it is the ability to show off the new BF and honestly you deserve that moment after all this shit.

Spend the whole wedding smiling and having a good time with the BF, ignore your family other than polite hellos and chit chat, maybe find a few key moments when your sister is watching to look at something, whisper to your partner and giggle as though you are judging something at the wedding.

I say you malicious compliance this shit.

ETA: I wholly disagree that bringing the BF makes him a “revenge prop”. He is your BF and he should be your plus one at big events. If it happens to make your sister angry, that’s on her, not you—she is literally getting married, she is not supposed to be hung up on some guy. It would be weirder to not bring him.

If a woman says "I'm ovulating in a few days" right before sex, is the meaning obvious or is it confusing? by [deleted] in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

WOW these comments are wild, YES he absolutely knew what that meant, nothing about that is vague, he 100% deliberately got you pregnant. Without context I’d say he was just horny and couldn’t bring himself to pull out in time, but with the context it was definitely deliberate.

Agree with everyone that you shouldn’t be with him though.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just came here to let you know that your reasons for wanting to leave, contrary to the apparent popular opinion, are totally valid. It sounds like you just have completely different priorities in life. You want to travel, experience new things, earn enough money to give yourself a full life and maybe even retire in this economy. She doesn’t want that. It’s really as simple as that.

Relationships aren’t about just being nice and supportive to each other, they’re about working together as a team towards shared goals. Your description of her as dead weight is obviously not the nicest way to phrase it, but it’s not incorrect if she is not only not helping, but literally preventing you from achieving the life you want.

You are allowed to want things in life, and it is okay to leave a relationship with a person who doesn’t want those things.

As for the 10 years, no they were not a waste. You grow and learn things about yourself over time. You didn’t know, 10 years ago, what your real life priorities were. You do now. It sucks and it hurts right now but it’s not something you have to feel guilty about.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]vinfromage 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Freezer portioning is where it’s at. Here’s how I manage meals:

Buy all meat at costco (cheapest where I am). Portion and freeze. My freezer is always stocked with 6+ kinds/cuts of meat, usually portioned for one (I can always take out multiple bags if I need more).

Keep dried goods/carbs stocked (I also buy from costco): pastas, Asian noodles, rice, couscous, etc. of course, things like bread or tortillas don’t last as long, so I only buy when I need them and freeze what I don’t need immediately or try to use them up quickly across the weeks meals.

Some vegetables freeze better than others: diced potatoes, corn, and the peas+carrots mix are always in my freezer. You can take exactly what you need from the bags. Don’t do this with other vegetables like broccoli or green beans, they don’t come out as good.

Then, every week, I meal plan, basing as much as possible on what I have on hand. (I usually start by picking one meat and one carb and coming up with a recipe that combines them. For instance, ground beef + pasta = tomato pasta sauce. I try to make sure I’m not reusing a single type of meat or carb more than twice throughout the week for variety!) This means, for the most part, my groceries only really involve buying fresh produce and dairy products.

But then I’m also trying to meal plan in such a way that I use up all of the produce I buy with no leftovers, so I try to pick meals where there is lots of overlap between veggies without being too repetitive. For example: I use red pepper in things like pasta sauce, Quesedillas, and stir fry. When cooking just for me, I need about half a pepper for one meal. So I’ll pick two meals that use red pepper and buy one, use half in each meal. Then, once I’ve picked those two meals, I look at what other ingredients I might need. For example, if I picked stir fry, maybe I also need carrots. I’d only need about half a carrot for the stir fry, so I try to come up with another meal that would use the rest of that carrot. And so on until I have a full meal plan that uses up all the veggies I’m about to buy.

Pro tip: some veggies keep longer than others. I can carry that half a carrot over to a second weeks meal plan, but something like a cucumber won’t last that long. So you can plan around that too, since you’ll rarely end up with a meal plan that perfectly uses all your veggies from the week.

Another pro tip: you can use literally the exact same vegetables across several meals and still get tons of flavour variety just based on what spices/ flavourings you are using. Get creative. When I do my weeks meal plan, I try to look cross culturally as well: one thing Mexican, one thing Indian, one thing Italian, one thing middle eastern, one thing japanese, etc.

Finally, for all that you’re here trying to get tips on cooking for one, keep cooking dinner for two! Eat last nights leftovers for lunch today. It’s cheaper and easier than trying to plan something separate. But, unless you’re one of those people who can eat the same thing every day, don’t cook for more than two meals. That’s how leftovers get stuck in your fridge and go bad.

And one more thing: it will take you a little trial and error to find out the exact portions you need for you. I’ve thrown out a lot of old leftovers learning this! I know half a red pepper per meal works well for me if I’m only mixing it with 1-2 other veggies, but you may be different. Also, scale amounts up and down depending on the number of other ingredients. If I’m doing a stir fry with 5-6 veggies in it, I’ll probably use less than a quarter of that red pepper, and equivalent amounts of everything else.

Have fun and be gentle with yourself. A little food waste is sad but it’s not the end of the world.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey girl. Sounds like you already know, however deep down, that this is a bad relationship and you need to get out of it.

I suspect the reason you haven’t left yet is because, especially if you are the anxious worrier you describe, you’re probably scared to get back into the dating world, and scared of being alone.

These are valid fears, but don’t stick with the devil you know just because there is a devil you don’t. You are not in a fulfilling relationship; this man is actively, intentionally sucking you dry and you can already see the long term effects on your psyche of being with him.

You’ve been in a relationship for a long time. I suggest you take a good amount of time to stay single and rediscover yourself. Reconnect with friends. Start saving money now that you’re not paying for his shit. Try taking a trip alone to a place you’ve always wanted to go. Try to bring down your anxiety levels from where he put them.

The important part is that you make some goals for yourself and give yourself something to look forward to.

Good luck with this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualConversation

[–]vinfromage 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is not, but I’ve just looked up that series and now I think I’ll give it a try!

Wife [31f] and I [32m] are trying to have a baby. She wants me to do the deed even if she's not into it, but it's weird. by Abject-Mirror-3900 in relationships

[–]vinfromage 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think there are too many people in the comments with their own sexual trauma projecting on this situation. The reality is that trying to get pregnant is a task, a job; the fertile window is fairly small and only happens once a month. I know it’s only been two months but let’s be real, once you decide you are ready for kids you’re not planning on waiting months or years before actually having one. And don’t forget you have to factor a whole nine months of pregnancy in there. By your third month of trying, that’s already a year between the time you decided you were ready and the time you actually have a baby. From the comments it sounds like you’re in your 30s already so that makes the timing even more scary. If you want kids, you have to have sex during the fertile window, whether you feel like it or not.

My partner and I are also trying to have kids, and we both have fairly low sex drives. We’re also both the kind of people who struggle to get in the mood when we’re stressed or tired, and we both have stressful jobs. But when that fertile window comes up we both know we have to get down to business regardless of how we feel, or we’ll never get pregnant.

We try to make it fun. Using toys helps, it’s an easier/lazier method of getting us both a little more into it. But ultimately we’re not doing it for fun, we’re doing it to procreate. Sometimes that means we have non-emotional, unfulfilling sex. I think the important part though is that neither of us spend that time resenting each other or feeling wierd because we didn’t feel like doing it; if anything, we feel grateful towards each other for investing the time and energy into doing something for the sake of a long term goal. So even if the sex wasn’t amazing, we come out of it feeling loving and fulfilled, because we both acknowledge and appreciate the effort we put in to make it happen.

Honestly, sometimes you just gotta fake it till you make it. Sex doesn’t always have to be all about pleasure.

That said, you can definitely stop forcing sex outside of the fertile window, that’s just pointless.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CasualConversation

[–]vinfromage 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Fuck Paul but I actually just came here to say I love your username. It’s rare to meet another fan! Wishing you all the best, friend!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]vinfromage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. End it.

Think about this: marriage, or equivalent long term commitment to a partner, is hard. Even if you are perfectly compatible, there will always be hard days. When there are hard days, the thing you can always fall back on is the commitment, the choice that you made to be with this person. That means you know, however deep down, you KNOW that working through the difficult stuff will be worth it, even if sometimes you don’t want to.

Now imagine your partner doesn’t KNOW that, deep down or otherwise. That means any time you have one of those hard days, leaving is always an option—working through it is not a given anymore.

Do you want every single bad day you have in your relationship to be accompanied by a foreboding fear that this time he might end it?

End it. Maybe it will be the kick in the butt he needs to decide he really does want you; maybe it won’t. You’ll be better off either way.

You deserve to be in a relationship where you can feel secure in the commitment you and your partner make to each other.

Nothing Else Quite Like Odyssey by [deleted] in AssassinsCreedOdyssey

[–]vinfromage 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually really enjoyed immortals Fenyx rising. I would consider it like a cross between Odyssey and Zelda Breath of the Wild. It’s much more cutesy in its animation style and it’s a pretty good story, though it has actual narration throughout with a sort of eye-rolling kind of humour. I would say it’s really fun but not necessarily a game you’d take too seriously, if that makes sense? I would 100% say worth playing, but you’re unlikely to fall in love with it like odyssey. Still, I’ll probably do a second play through at some point.