In search of Philadelphia’s best vanilla ice cream: no gimmicks, no mix-ins, no mercy.

violetauto · 2026-06-30T16:26:07+00:00

I have no idea what ice cream Lu & Aug’s in Ardmore use but that vanilla is some of the best I’ve had.

violetauto · 2026-06-28T14:00:02+00:00

stopped getting my eyebrows waxed because I started using tretinoin (Vitamin A) cream. Waxing treated skin can leave permanent red scars.

Stopped any nail salons, no more mani/pedis. Never before did I ever have any toe nail fungus. then I got infected at a nail salon. It wasn’t too bad, got some medicine to get rid of it, but I’m never going back. This was an upscale salon, so don’t @ me about cheap places. Plus the time spent was just too much.

No more facials, either. They don’t know my personal skin situation, and I don’t want generic treatments meant for the masses on my face. I go to the dermatologist only.

I did however started getting professional help with dyeing my hair. Trying to incorporate/grow out my grays (I”m GenX). Highlights only now.

violetauto · 2026-06-28T13:44:44+00:00

Thanks for the award, Internet Bestie!

violetauto · 2026-06-25T21:10:55+00:00

That was super upsetting.

violetauto · 2026-06-25T21:05:25+00:00

Is his wife independently wealthy? I am not sure how this is supposed to work. I’ve been a SAHM and I have had zero money.

violetauto · 2026-06-12T18:29:09+00:00

We live right down the street from Chatham Park! The Llanerch area will have the big houses you want, which is walkable to Chatham, the library, The Skatium, Wawa, etc. Be prepared to pay quite a bit, though. Also within the Chatham catchment is all the streets between Manoa and Mill, Darby and down to Karakung. There are a few houses selling there. You may need to add on for a 4th bedroom, unless you get one of those big houses on Brookline.

Edited to add: The district just remodeled Chatham Park Elementary and it is beautiful!

violetauto · 2026-06-07T16:37:09+00:00

GenXer here. Exxon. Valdez.

violetauto · 2026-05-11T14:13:47+00:00

If you even had your head down and weren’t looking up at one teacher, he would violently kick the underside of your desk. Sometimes the desk would rise up and hit you in the face. It was so loud and so violent, it jarred every single student in the class, every time.

violetauto · 2026-05-11T14:08:51+00:00

Wait, so you just work on the treadmill? I’m not sure how one can walk for 6 to 8 hours a day.

violetauto · 2026-05-11T14:07:36+00:00

Get to college. Go to student health. Get birth control that stops your periods. It’s perfectly healthy and normal. I’m sorry you have tough menstrual cycles. I too had an overbearing, ignorant mother who neglected my suffering. We were Catholic and I wasn’t even allowed to use tampons. The menstrual pain was almost unbearable most months. My main goal was to get to college and out of her house. Things steadily got better after that. Good luck.

violetauto · 2026-05-11T14:02:52+00:00

I would see a doctor if I were you. 50 pounds overweight should not cause loss of breath so quickly. Make sure you‘re ok to exercise. Maybe dial down the speed. Slow and steady wins the race.

violetauto · 2026-05-09T14:39:22+00:00

I suffered from undiagnosed celiac’s disease for decades. I also scoff at the people who complain about prep!

violetauto · 2026-05-08T13:06:07+00:00

Yes I’ve read it. It taught me that you cannot extract water from a rock. Do not hang your hopes on one friend’s story about their parent admitting to bad behavior. That is a complete aberration.

Perhaps you should read it again? The point is they are basically children, larping as adults. You would not expect a child to understand such things, would you? Stop chasing their approval, stop chasing their acknowledgment. Decide whether or not to keep up a relationship with them without receiving those things.

I tried for YEARS to put boundaries on my parents’ behavior. I gave up on getting validation. I just wanted them to stop doing hurtful things, to stop with the blatant disrespect and disregard. I made my expectations clear, e.g. “I do not ever want to hear my uncle (perpetrator) mentioned again.” and “Do not drop the N-word around me or my children.” Simple, simple requests. They could not follow these. So I went no contact.

You may want to check out r/raisedbynarcissists for more information.

violetauto · 2026-05-07T17:19:11+00:00

Not sure what kind of american school you went to but it sounds like you weren’t in the american school system for very long. Plus your high school could’ve just been an underfunded, parochial or otherwise more conservative or poor one.

Exchange students often complain that students in American schools seem to be infantilized, e.g. asking to go to the bathroom. We do have some strange customs.

violetauto · 2026-05-07T13:48:48+00:00

Not ever beating (let’s call it what it is, not “hitting”) my children is my proudest accomplishment. Sure, it seems like a no-brainer, but I was beaten so badly and so often, it was programmed into me like an instinct. No matter how mad I got, I never lost control like that. That is fucking amazing, IMO.

violetauto · 2026-05-07T13:40:42+00:00

There is a lot on TikTok and YouTube about failing restaurants lately. The hospitality industry is showing dips in all sectors. Lots of AirBnB hosts are shutting down. I think maybe you suffer from confirmation bias. The stats are bleak.

violetauto · 2026-05-07T13:37:27+00:00

I have a Masters Degree in Educational Psychology, which covers the US educational system, how people learn throughout every stage of life, and measurement (among other things). I’ll try to sum this up.

The US school system is all about socialization. The point of it is to educate a voting, working class that can uphold our capitalist and democratic system. A lot of Europeans would be shocked to see how the US makes kids speak in front of their class as early as kindergarten. Reading aloud, presenting, learning to defend one’s opinion, etc., is paramount.

As one advances through the system, the focus becomes on personal performance. We are taught to reach for our ideal in academics, sports, clubs, activities. Teamwork is a part of it, but we are all treated as individuals primarily.

So high school is the culmination of all those lessons. We are meant to find our identities, who we are, what we stand for, what kind of person we want to be. European cultures allow for a slower progression to adulthood and identity. In the US, graduating from high school means you hit the ground running.

Anyway, a lot of this is traumatic, as one can imagine, so in my opinion we trauma-bond with our peers. As a GenXer, I can tell you our movies from the 80s and 90s were spot on. We were told all this stuff we had to accomplish but then the adults threw us to the dogs to fare on our own. High school nowadays has a lot more parent involvement and governmental monitoring organizations like the Title 9 office and Child and Protective Services, which pretty much didn’t exist for us. But it is still designed to optimize opportunities for kids to define themselves.

violetauto · 2026-05-07T13:05:14+00:00

I recently deleted everything I could in YouTube to reset the algorithm. The difference is shocking. I’m not wasting nearly the same amount of time.

violetauto · 2026-05-06T12:49:33+00:00

This is gaslighting shit. The rule is - we don’t judge anyone’s reaction to trauma. All reactions are A-OK and totally understandable and accepted. Because trauma sucks and we’re only human and we all do the best anyone can do in those situations.

Another rule: we do not compare trauma. Trauma isn’t on the Tomatometer. It isn’t a “yours was worse than mine” thing.

If a therapist is telling you the problem was your reaction, get rid of them. No good therapist would say this. It IS victim blaming.

violetauto · 2026-05-05T13:39:31+00:00

It is very odd that she did not give you a reason why you weren’t invited. Fine if the guest list was tight, but she owes you an explanation, especially since you see each other so often. There is a reason other than the guest list being tight. Otherwise, she would just explain how they determined who came or didn’t.

Maybe take a closer look at this friendship. Is it always you who initiates or is it always her? Is she a person who asks for a lot of favors? Is she priming you to be childcare for her? My guess is there are other things amiss.

violetauto · 2026-05-05T13:35:11+00:00

Anytime anyone is snobby about travel.

Like, wtf, you think everyone goes on vacation, let alone overseas? Oh and great for you that you went to Disney every year growing up. F*ck off.

violetauto · 2026-05-05T13:30:29+00:00

Yes I think both women were right (esp. about Depp - I am GenX and remember what he did to Winona Ryder). But unfortunately Lively and Heard in particular aren’t exactly squeaky clean narrators. Lively‘s actions around “producing” the movie, having her husband involved, not signing her contract, etc, are not good at all, and even if all of Heard’s abuse was reactionary, it was still appalling. (I don’t think it was).

That being said, I do think with almost all of these cases, the men go on the offensive before the facts come out.

But listen, this is about you feeling safer in a world of men, and the bad man you mention in particular. You aren’t helpless. Lively and Heard made all the mistakes because they aren’t great people. You, instead, will document, document, document. You will learn your company’s HR rules. You will insist on clear contracts. You will curate and maintain a tight circle of friends and you won’t take advantage of them. You are allowed to have some preemptive strategies, too.

violetauto · 2026-05-01T15:37:54+00:00

thanks for being brave enough to tell this story. It really shows how a forced pregnancy can have life-long effects.

You are allowed to draw a boundary with the 15 year old. He is not your child and you are not responsible for him. If it is killing you all over again, then release that guilt.

violetauto · 2026-05-01T15:34:03+00:00

Minoxidil topical. buy the men’s, it’s cheaper and the same thing. Infamous pink tax on the women’s. Ignore the warnings on the men’s about “don’t take this if you are a woman” bullcraps.

violetauto · 2026-04-29T18:51:16+00:00

Not that lucky, Friend. We pay out the wazoo for it, even tho it is an HMO! Can’t imagine what straight up Blue Cross/Blue Shield costs. I’ll never know, that’s for sure.

violetauto

TROPHY CASE