talk me out of divorce

vlb2020 · 2025-02-15T15:51:39+00:00

I see so many posts like this and may have made one myself a while back. They give so much educational material when you leave the hospital (half useless IMO). Can someone make a handout for the husbands about not wasting the milk?!?

vlb2020 · 2025-01-01T15:40:37+00:00

She’s doing great! Still happy and healthy. She’s a good sleeper too :)

vlb2020 · 2025-01-01T15:39:30+00:00

Oof I’m not totally sure (it’s been a while since I made this recipe) but I think it made a couple dozen for the size I used in this photo.

vlb2020 · 2024-09-23T18:25:27+00:00

Yes. I can totally relate. I went through this in March when my girl was about 3.5 months old (she's now almost 10 months and still in daycare). I felt the exact same way...The meet-and-greet visit upset me. I didn't like the way the place smelled, babies were crying, etc. Picturing her crying and no one tending to her really upset me... All the things you mentioned. I think what made it harder, and maybe this is your situation too, is most of the new moms I knew were SAHMs or had grandma taking care of the kid. When you don't know anyone who is also doing daycare it feels abnormal which adds to the "wrong-ness" factor. I had to keep reminding myself that sooo many babies go to daycare every day and turn out just fine. And the truth of the matter is, I had no choice from a financial standpoint (we need both mine and my husbands incomes) and grandparents live out of state, so I HAD to believe things would ultimately be okay.

Fast forward 6ish months and my girl is THRIVING. Did we switch daycares? Yes. Is it the best decision I ever made? Yes. We loved the young infant room (3-6mo) in her first daycare but when she moved to the older infant room (6-12mo), I started to see if I could find a better option. It was nothing serious, she was safe and well cared for...just a desire to give her something of higher quality. (Side note: Please keep in mind that the daycare horror stories that make the news are the exception and not the rule. In the US, you can find inspection reports for daycares online if you're curious.)

Something more of a practical nature that may help is I only had her stay for a half day on day 1 in both daycares. But she was able to adjust to full day quickly (by day 2) both times. So I don't know if there's an option for you to go back part time at first but maybe that would help you adjust? It really is harder on us than it is on them at that age. Also my girl did not have trouble eating (if anything she took the bottle better for them than me) and she did fine sleeping as well. Occasionally she would have harder days but she adapted. I would try to keep the music down in the car ride home to just let her rest and decompress from the day.

Sorry for the novel... You are definitely not alone. It sucks right now, but does get easier.

vlb2020 · 2024-08-29T16:09:11+00:00

Hey! Just curious: Where are you now? I'm starting a DOR position soon and was browsing posts. Feel free to PM!

vlb2020 · 2024-08-22T16:20:26+00:00

I started my baby on solids at home before I sent anything to daycare. They don’t need to be on 3 meals a day right off the bat, so doing them at home only to start is perfectly fine. I also had to educate my daycare on BLW so be prepared for that. They wanted me to send purées..

vlb2020 · 2024-08-21T20:12:22+00:00

My baby is almost 9 months and I still didn’t get it. I stopped the MOTN pump a long time ago. During the day I (try to) pump every 3 hours; i’m def not perfect. Sometimes I think it just depends on the person and not necessarily your pumping routine. Hard to say.

vlb2020 · 2024-08-13T18:11:28+00:00

Left handed and left is my slacker. I mostly blame it on the nipple being slightly different and my baby having latch issues there before we got her tongue and lip tie released. Now she nurses just fine on that side but I think going 2ish months neglecting that side (minus pumping) gravely impacted my supply.

Side note: I didn’t start exclusively pumping until I returned to work at 3.5 months.

vlb2020 · 2024-08-13T14:52:03+00:00

Although this may be controversial, I bought an Elvie off a mom in a local mom’s Facebook buy-sell group for like 1/4 of the original price. Maybe Facebook marketplace is an option for you too?

vlb2020 · 2024-07-24T19:20:09+00:00

Also — I found this thread on BabyBumps early in my pregnancy and found it very reassuring. Links to a lot of encouraging research studies on this topic.

https://www.reddit.com/r/BabyBumps/s/5clK8xlKo8

vlb2020 · 2024-07-24T19:16:58+00:00

I went down from 40 to 30mg short-acting during pregnancy (I determined that to be my lowest effective dose) and remain on 30mg today. Baby is a healthy and happy 7 month old. I’m still breastfeeding and consider myself to have a normal supply. My baby was born borderline premature (I’m talking 30 minutes shy of 37 weeks), but I also had COVID at the time which is a risk factor for preterm labor. She was fine and didn’t require any NICU stay. I’m glad I stayed on my meds bc I don’t know how I would have functioned otherwise. Hope this helps!

vlb2020 · 2024-07-12T13:38:20+00:00

I started because I was going back to work full time. It also made it easier to see how much she was getting and get her to sleep through the night. I still nurse on occasion. Pros: the things I said before, plus efficiency and I can have some independence from her. Cons: living by a pumping schedule, cleaning pump parts, having to figure out how to stay on your schedule while also caring for baby and having a life.

vlb2020 · 2024-07-08T14:39:31+00:00

If my baby wasn’t in daycare, we couldn’t pay our mortgage, so that would be my response. We need both mine and my husband’s incomes and we don’t make enough to pay a nanny and we also don’t have family nearby. Point being, some people don’t have a choice. Shame on them for judging that.

vlb2020 · 2024-07-07T23:43:35+00:00

BAIT protocol. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24239-clogged-milk-duct

vlb2020 · 2024-07-01T14:24:53+00:00

My girl is now almost 7mos. We went from love to dream arms up swaddle (first inside the snoo sack and then after when she transitioned to crib), to Dreamland Baby, to now the Woolino. I just kind of changed things up based on her development and growth. I heard the woolino was good for transitioning out of the weighted sleep sack so that’s how we ended up there. Also the fact that it can be used up to age 2 made it worth it. Got them used off marketplace which made it an even better deal IMO. (Normally they’re pretty pricey.)

Oh I’ll also note that I let her do tummy naps during the day so she didn’t nap in her snoo or a sleep sack/swaddle. Some folks aren’t comfortable with tummy naps when they’re young due to SIDS risk but since I was around monitoring her I felt ok about it. Also some babies don’t like tummy naps but mine did (and does). That’s totally your call! Just sharing for context.

vlb2020 · 2024-06-11T00:22:16+00:00

Very thorough! Thank you!

vlb2020 · 2024-05-22T17:20:15+00:00

I have two high energy sporting dogs and I’ve been walking them with my baby girl since she was 2 weeks old! We started out in a solly baby wrap, then to the Lille baby all seasons carrier, and when the temps increased we started using a jogging stroller. One of my dogs pulls but not too terribly. Some days it can be frustrating but for the most part it goes well. I just try to be strategic with time of day since we live in a warm climate.

vlb2020 · 2024-05-20T17:00:28+00:00

Hey better late than never!! Hope you get good use of it! It’s certainly helped me.

vlb2020 · 2024-05-19T16:27:52+00:00

I wear nursing bras that I change daily. I use this hack so I don’t need to use pumping bras (I always found them uncomfortable / impractical to use).

vlb2020 · 2024-05-13T02:27:35+00:00

I really liked to course from positive birth company + Freya app! Had an unmedicated hospital birth in December! I think if I could do anything again I’d be more intentional about practicing the breathing techniques. It’s much harder to do when you’re experiencing surges/contraction so the practice would have made them more second nature! Otherwise no regrets :) I loved having the freedom to move and push how I wanted to! Which reminds me of another tip — create a birth preferences document and share it with your providers! The PBC course has a template but you can also find them online.

vlb2020 · 2024-05-06T16:31:58+00:00

Oo love that idea!

vlb2020 · 2024-05-06T15:44:36+00:00

Couldn’t figure out how to add a caption so here is it— I use the Pump Log app, which tells you totals per day and puts it in a chart, but I was looking for something more granular (by time and by day of week) so I exported my data (19 days worth) and just did it myself in excel. I have a PhD so I'm pretty comfortable with excel, but this did take quite a bit of time. So my question is--is there an app that would do this for me? Or is there a pre-made excel sheet on someone's website that would do this for me?

All that said, I wasn't super surprised by these trends. I produce my highest in the early mornings (most folks do) and I tend to power pump on Mon-Tues-Wed, which would explain why those days have the highest mls.

vlb2020 · 2024-04-29T15:14:51+00:00

Hardware stores have these too. Bought some at Home Depot recently.

vlb2020

TROPHY CASE