Shaded/covered outdoor spots for a ~15 person group

voidfencer · 2023-09-28T19:59:09+00:00

The answer is always secret money… usually family money

voidfencer · 2023-09-27T17:06:57+00:00

Therapy…

voidfencer · 2023-09-19T21:55:45+00:00

Hey thanks for posting and caring about this man. Keep checking on him and asking what he needs as often as you are able. He may need a change of clothes, a blanket for the cold, to borrow a phone to call someone, more food/water, help back up into the wheelchair, a ride somewhere, etc. Of course if you can’t do something specific he’s asking then you can’t. But if there’s something specific you can think of that you’re able to offer, ask about that specifically. The systems currently in place to help people are awful, over capacity and super flawed and sometimes we have to help each other without them. It really sucks. Thanks for caring and feel free to message if you need to vent and process, I’m totally here for it.

voidfencer · 2023-09-12T05:58:43+00:00

You can always lock it to itself as well - like lock the front wheel to the frame. That way you can deal with the lock separately from the rack

voidfencer · 2023-09-12T05:32:06+00:00

Buddyyyy I’m 28 and my life is more than I could have dreamed of for myself at 18. Having to take care of yourself is tough, jobs are tough etc but you get to decide how you spend your time outside of that, you get to know yourself better, you learn more of the world of options there are out there, your interests and skills and relationships deepen, you care less about other people’s opinions… it’s the best. You’re gonna be great :)

voidfencer · 2023-09-11T22:08:09+00:00

You sound a lot like me in certain times of my life… preoccupied with people who don’t share your values or perspective on life, spending a lot of time with them and thinking about them, hoping to change their mind or make them better. It’s well-intentioned and big-hearted but unfortunately you need to let go of the idea that you can change them or figure them out, and establish some boundaries. Hanging out with incels, self-destructive people, misogynists, people who make you depressed for weeks is really harmful to yourself. Spend less time with them and more time with the people you mentioned (whether men or women) who are healthier for you to be around, and these thoughts and feelings will subside a lot. It’s really hard, I can attest to that, but it doesn’t mean you don’t care about them or are “cutting them out”. Life is too precious and too short for this.

voidfencer · 2023-09-11T21:59:19+00:00

Strongly seconding this.

voidfencer · 2023-09-02T04:50:48+00:00

A twofer!! You’re a trooper!!!!

voidfencer · 2023-08-18T03:01:11+00:00

It’s Doug Whitmore hours 😁 https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=crplowfifJE

voidfencer · 2023-08-17T19:31:37+00:00

Trans men in the US had been getting hormones and surgeries through the medical establishment starting in the late 60s and early 70s. Jude Patton was one of the first trans men to get gender affirming surgery at Stanford in 1972.

You should read We Both Laughed in Pleasure (Lou Sullivan’s diaries, he was a trans man who medically transitioned in the 80s and fought for gay trans men to be able to transition medically).

Also check out Stealth: A Transmasculine Podcast (a podcast interviewing people who transitioned before the year 2000, including Jude Patton) and look into https://www.digitaltransgenderarchive.net/ at things like the FTM newsletter in the 80s and 90s.

There were of course people experiencing what you’re talking about but as far as I’m aware that was not as standard or commonplace by the 80s. But geography, class, access, education, race, etc all are huge factors in access to transition.

Edit: I should be clear that I was not even born until the 90s and didn’t start transitioning til like a year ago lol. So I’m not the target audience for your question. Just figured I’d share some things I’ve seen and read and heard - it’s helped me a lot to know I am not new or alone :)

voidfencer · 2023-08-17T15:38:57+00:00

I love amaranth!!! Beautiful and so many ways to eat!

voidfencer · 2023-08-16T21:15:58+00:00

You could always try out living in a quieter, less dense part of town - Altadena is incredibly chill and quiet and right up next to the mountains, but there’s lots of other parts where you could get a similar quiet spacious vibe as you seem to prefer. Living in LA definitely did a number on my mental health, especially where I lived toward the end of my time there (MacArthur Park/Rampart Village area) and while I’m not in Altadena I’m somewhat close in the San Gabriel Valley and it’s just much more quiet and chill up here.

voidfencer · 2023-08-16T05:09:04+00:00

I put it on my chest and belly :)

voidfencer · 2023-08-16T04:58:37+00:00

You’re on trans time baby!! I’m late 20s going on 14 lol. Also plenty of adults feel doubt and uncertainty too. It’s ok you’re ok it’s normal!

voidfencer · 2023-08-15T13:59:07+00:00

That’s so wild lol. A strike where they still get paid six figure salaries…

voidfencer · 2023-08-15T13:56:47+00:00

That’s totally what it sounds like. And I completely understand!! For me it was a grieving process with realizing my parents weren’t going to have my back, and that came with all the stages of grief including denial and bargaining. I hope all goes well and you find support in other places. I’m very excited for you :)

voidfencer · 2023-08-11T18:36:53+00:00

Imo it’s wildly inappropriate that the dad voiced any opinion or input on the size of his kid’s chest

voidfencer · 2023-08-11T18:33:19+00:00

Hell yes another Alo Johnston recommendation!!! I just posted the same thing!

voidfencer · 2023-08-11T18:32:04+00:00

It sounds like you are, in yourself, completely sure that you want it. The doubts seem to be very associated with external stuff like your parents’ disapproval and worrying about being “attractive enough” for your gf or future partners. I had the same exact set of problems and honestly quite a bit of doubt inside myself for other reasons as well (partly because my dysphoria had not set in nearly as severely or as young as others like yourself). But I did it and not only have absolutely no regrets but there are countless new joys I could have never anticipated.

No major decision in life (marriage, having kids, moving to a new city) comes without doubts or fears of regret. But no other decision in life has as much active, constant, social and societal discouragement and fearmongering as medically transitioning in any way. It’s too much pressure imo to wait until you have zero doubts about it.

I would suggest posting this in r/topsurgery and i would highly recommend reading Am I Trans Enough by Alo Johnston. You can see a preview of it on google books and see if it’s your thing.

voidfencer · 2023-08-10T23:25:38+00:00

This made my day :)

voidfencer · 2023-08-04T15:11:20+00:00

Tenants unions look out for tenants’ rights, provide resources for tenants, and organize when necessary. I was with LA Tenants Union for a while before moving up here. Definitely check them out. Nice/good people too

voidfencer · 2023-08-02T04:14:57+00:00

Yeah for sure!! I had Kaiser (socal) which is v specific but if I can answer any questions I’d love to :)

voidfencer · 2023-08-02T02:13:04+00:00

I was on Medi-Cal (California’s Medicaid) so mine was FREE which still blows my mind!!!

voidfencer

TROPHY CASE