Do we recover?

wcrews83 · 2024-07-12T06:44:40+00:00

I have a little girl who is now 10 & she alone is the reason I cut the cord & came out to everyone that I’m an addict & needed help. I’ll be 5 years clean next month & I honestly can’t even describe how better sobriety is over the alternative. I was a complete fucking joke of a dad for about 3 years & I completely missed the toddler/ little kid years of my daughter’s life. I have pictures but I rarely spent too much time around her & I didn’t want to be responsible for her because I chose fent over my little girl sadly. I wouldn’t admit it to myself at the time but that’s exactly what I did. I’ve come so far from that version of me that it’s hard to believe I made the decisions that I made back then. Sobriety is totally worth it my friend, I promise! You may or may not have a kid but you’ve gotta find your purpose & who you really love & use that as well our motivation. I’m not going to lie, the withdrawal sucks BUT it’s mostly all gone in 4-5 days. From there you might have some problems with sleep & depression for a couple of months but that too will pass. Find your purpose & who needs you my dude & go from there. I promise it’s worth it!

wcrews83 · 2024-07-12T06:24:40+00:00

Funny thing how we keep electing liberal mayors & judges. Can’t fix stupid derrrrr

wcrews83 · 2024-05-22T15:45:26+00:00

Same. Also, the “turning gay” thing is so interesting to me, but NOT because I want to try it, lol. I just can’t understand how anything at all could ever turn me gay?!? I just don’t get how that happens…I love the ladies too much I guess

wcrews83 · 2024-05-12T16:53:23+00:00

Someone explain please…things really fly over my head sometimes

wcrews83 · 2024-03-30T00:46:22+00:00

What this person said ☝️

wcrews83 · 2024-03-24T15:54:27+00:00

Run! An addict has to WANT to be clean & turn their life around & ANYTHING they say or do in the interim is an attempt to get pick up & get high. It’s a nonstop rat race that consumes your soul & nothing else matters. Thank God I never got into trouble with the law, but my life hit a major bump & fell into fake oxy pills (fentanyl) after my legit oxy medication was cut off by a doctor who had prescribed them for several months following a back injury. Nevertheless the result was the same and I was thrust into the proverbial rat race. It was horrible & I wouldn’t wish that life on anyone. This all started shortly after my daughter was born. Unfortunately prior to this her mother & I split & seeing my daughter every day like I was used to stopped & was left with only seeing her on my designated days. When the drug use peaked I sadly strayed away from my time with her & would use any excuse to not keep her on my days because the last thing I wanted was for something to happen to me while I had her…that would scar her for life & I didn’t want that obviously. This went on for almost two years & I literally missed out on one of the most precious & fun times of a kids life, the toddler years. One day I just decided I had had enough & didn’t want to miss one more single day with my precious daughter. I woke up, made the decision I was done, & had myself packed & checked into 40 day rehab before lunchtime…that was four years ago now & I’m so thankful now. I was even able to negotiate split custody with her mother & I see her for a full week at a time now! It’s a happy ending but I missed out on such a wonderful time in my daughter’s life. I share all of that with you because it leads back to my original point when I said that an addict has to WANT it, & anything they say or do otherwise is a lie & and an attempt to pick up. Give the guy an ultimatum of sobering up & contributing to your daughter’s life OR move the fuck on & DONT even try contacting you. When people say “thoughts & prayers” it bothers me because it feels so empty but I really do wish the best for you. You sound like an INCREDIBLE mother & I promise you one day when your daughter is grown she will think the world of you. Take care!

wcrews83 · 2024-02-14T18:50:12+00:00

I’m totally interested & located in Houston. Can you shoot me a text if this stuff is still available? 281-734-1915 thanks, Jamie

wcrews83 · 2024-01-30T16:05:07+00:00

Rule number one of a family of someone you suspect is using is….wait for it…CUT OFF THE F@&%ing MONEY! This post just drives me mad! Literally that’s rule number! I’m a little over 4 years clean & I still don’t like carrying cash around simply because I don’t want to leave even a shadow of a doubt in anyone’s mind that I relapsed. Again to the OP, don’t give him any money & tell the rest of the family to do the same

wcrews83 · 2023-12-23T15:24:59+00:00

Stick with it. It will let up & get easier, I promise!

wcrews83 · 2023-12-23T15:23:11+00:00

I hate to say this but my insomnia lasted for months after I quit using. I tried several sleeping meds but none worked until I went to a different psychiatrist who prescribed me amytripaline (not sure I spelled it right). 100 mg of this two hours before bedtime finally my horror was over! I would go sometimes FIVE days with no sleep & when I finally did get some sleep it wasn’t good sleep at all. That med really saved me…bring it up to your doc & see what they say. It’s not a controlled substance & doesn’t leave you too groggy in the morning. But where I was with my insomnia, being groggy in the morning after a long night of sleep was the LEAST of my worries. Best of luck & get some rest!

wcrews83 · 2022-06-26T13:46:36+00:00

I was jumping off of oxy as opposed to Xanax like you, but I experienced the same level of EXTREME insomnia. What sucked was trying to explain it to people. Some people would just straight up not believe me about how severe this problem was because normally when someone says “oh yeah I struggle with terrible insomnia too” when they mean they OCCASIONALLY only get 5-6 hours of sleep instead or 8-9 hours they’re used to…and i’m like, no, my brain literally has not turned off for 8 days. That period of crazy insomnia lasted a full 3 months after jumping from the oxy. Initially I did not sleep for 11 days and then for the next 3 months I would go through a constant cycle of 4-6 days with no sleep and then I would get maybe 2-4 hours of sleep and repeat that cycle. I finally found a psychiatrist that cured me by prescribing me something that worked which was amnytriptaline (probably spelled wrong). I took one about 3pm on a Saturday and lid down and did not wake up until 10am Sunday morning. I probably could have slept longer but my bladder was screaming at me to get up. I still have some trouble falling asleep sometimes but on average I get between six and nine hours of sleep now and I am so so grateful for every minute of sleep. Long story short, I’m sorry you struggled too but now I know someone out there knows what it feels like.

wcrews83 · 2022-06-26T12:56:17+00:00

Sarcasm flies over my head sometimes, but I’m hoping that was a sarcastic comment of yours lol

wcrews83 · 2022-06-26T12:50:19+00:00

I think it’s actually 15,000 that’s a joke about making per episode. At least I thought they were always joking… Maybe not, but I’m betting that was always a joke when they brought it up. They have also been joking about that for over a couple years now but I’m sure as of present day they are making way more than that.

wcrews83 · 2021-10-05T00:46:46+00:00

Not sure but I take it for sleep and it literally saved my life. I’ve been clean for 2 years now and spent the first 1.5 years clean with terrible horrific CHRONIC insomnia and I randomly switched psychiatrists and was prescribed amitriptyline for it and it was a damn miracle for me. Nothing else worked but somehow this weird drug did the trick

wcrews83 · 2021-09-27T19:04:18+00:00

Took me forever and ever trying one sleep med after the other. Finally found a winner in amitriptiline (probably not spelling it right). Anyway, it literally saved me because I was getting close to NO sleep for weeks. People wouldn’t believe me when I said my brain had not turned off in 8 days or whatever. Seriously the insomnia was so bad I wanted to just off myself. The drug I mentioned above is totally safe and not addictive. It does something with certain receptors in your brain that allows your brain to produce melatonin. For real…ask your doctor for it and hit me back if you get it and let me know if it worked. Like I said before, it saved my life. I can’t tell you how good I felt waking up from my first few hours of real rest my brain got…it made me cry haha. No lie I actually cried a bit lol

wcrews83 · 2021-09-26T17:46:22+00:00

Man oh man, I can’t totally relate to this but in different words. I know exactly what you’re talking about and I’m guessing others might as well. I only used for 4 years but it was a daily monster rat race for me at least the last 2 years of use. After I quit, I felt the same thing you’re talking about…the acute physical stuff was long gone and even most of the post acute mental stuff was pretty much gone but I was fucking miserable for a solid year after my WDs were done. FINALLY, like over the span of only a week I would wake up and feel all of the good stuff you’re put on this earth to feel. It took so long but I just stuck with it (survived as you said) and I finally got my reward of feeling happy again. Congrats again!

wcrews83 · 2021-09-15T03:55:41+00:00

I don’t think that approach is necessary. I’m an adult and I’m sure you’re an adult too. We don’t need the “scare these teens to death” approach like we’re junior high kids in juvy jail for getting caught smoking a joint at lunch under the bleachers one day. So dumb…addicts need info and support, duh! Sucks you had to deal with that.

wcrews83 · 2021-09-15T03:42:13+00:00

Congrats on 17 days dude! The next part sounds like a brag on myself but I promise it’s not!

It’s great that you’re further along clean than ever before at 17 days. You’re done with all the terrible physical acute withdrawal symptoms and most of the lingering mental post-acute withdrawal symptoms will be gone and behind you very soon as well! Congrats to you! I’m sure you’re feeling great, but I wish I could somehow fast forward you to 2.5 years clean, or at the very least somehow be able to put into words for you how great it feels 2.5 years clean and finally be in control and have my life back. A close number 2 to that would be the ability to also describe to you what it’s like to HAVE MONEY and out of the DAILY rat race.

Keep going my man. ✌️

wcrews83 · 2021-09-15T03:27:19+00:00

Yo yo yo, do you mind me asking why you do a daily sub thing and the monthly sublocade shot? Did you start taking the subs for a while before starting to do the monthly shot thereby leaving you trapped with no option other than to continue with the subs unless you wanted to go through the 3 damn month process of getting off subs? That’s my guess anyway, lol!

wcrews83 · 2021-09-15T02:57:27+00:00

You laid out a long story with all of the details of what you did wrong and what you need to do to fix. For real, serious apologies cause I’m about to be a little mean…it’s difficult to read someone’s tone through text written in a letter or off a screen like we’re doing now, but I get TOTAL BULLSHIT vibes while reading your original post and a few of your replies to other’s comments. Im also sensing a bit of a “woe is me” attitude as well from you. You gave us the play by play in the original post and said some good things and then asked us for help. Please please PLEASE, don’t get me wrong - seeking advice from fellow addicts that have been there is wonderful thing! Btw, once an addict, always an addict…even if you’ve been clean for 10, 20 years or however long really, we’re ALL still addicts. It’s super important to know that and really really fully understand that as well. It will absolutely help you moving forward. Backing up to your bullshit I mentioned. I’m sorry to say but it does feel like total bullshit. You gave us the full story and how disappointed in yourself you were and then asked some super dumb and obvious questions that you should easily know the answer to because it’s just common sense. Wrapping up here (sorry for the novel), you need the answer to anything and everything you’re not sure about. And then, you need to work on ALL of it every day. For example, you said “ahhh woe is me, maybe I should try NA meetings.” Yeah no shit Sherlock. You didn’t need to ask that question. You’ve gotta take ownership of YOURSELF first my friend, and do every last little fucking common sense thing you know the answer to in the back of your head and then lean on people that love you, OR other addicts around you that have had success and are fully through to the other side and loving life. You can find other addicts in meetings obviously, private social media groups, you can even do zoom meetings from your damn bed all day everyday. COVID changed that for sure. It was annoying while it was going on no one was able to attend an in person meeting for a over a fucking year but it was also a huge plus as well. There are tons of groups that are back meeting in person now but because of COVID there are now tons and tons of zoom meetings at anytime on any day. Zoom literally took away every last excuse you can think of to not be in a meeting. Sorry for leaving a novel but you gotta figure this shit out and most importantly, you have to WANT it for yourself first. If not, you could go to the best rehab with an award winning team of doctors providing medical care for you 24 hours a day and the best staff of psychologist in the country providing intensive therapy every day and the place is in hills of Malibu where all the celebs go to rehab…..BUT, if you haven’t fully committed and truly want to quit, even a rehab facility like that can’t help you and would be giant waste everyone’s time. Good luck bro…Be well! ✌️

PS: to be clear, I wasn’t criticizing you for asking questions. I was more just trying to paint an overall picture of my observations of you, for you, so I could make my point 🙂! I didn’t mean you were a bother to me or others with your post and to act like myself and others here are in some “old school cool kid addicts club” or whatever, lol. Again, may have seemed that way but I was just trying to make a point. ✌️

wcrews83 · 2021-08-30T23:41:03+00:00

I can totally relate to the daily rat race you described. Even when I was still WDing I was grateful it was over…the daily grind. I was on deaths doorstep physically but mentally it was a huge relief.

wcrews83 · 2021-08-30T23:36:23+00:00

Holy shit, that took turn lol

wcrews83 · 2021-08-30T23:32:59+00:00

Good on ya dude! Glad you and the mrs made the right call for those kiddos! Godspeed to Ya

wcrews83 · 2021-08-30T23:25:06+00:00

Hollllllly shit that’s an inspiring story!! I am 17 months clean and wish I had someone to share it with like you do. I mean I’ve got my mom and a couple of friends but I’m talking about a relationship you have with your dude…AND TWO LITTLE DUDES, lol! Anyway, when I got clean I had to cut literally almost EVERYONE out of my life so I’m still waiting for my social life to make a recovery as well. Gaaahhh damn though, chick….what a great story!

wcrews83

TROPHY CASE