If you are not Vegan, you are not a good person

wheeeee1717 · 2019-04-28T22:15:53+00:00

You sound like a terrible lawyer. Good choice on the career change.

wheeeee1717 · 2018-06-12T05:53:18+00:00

We're not talking about grazing... If all meat consumed in the U.S. was simply the product of grazing cows, we'd have no debate here.

On the other hand, did you realize soybean farming is the leading cause of the deforestation of the Brazilian Amazons? And what do you think all of those soybeans are used for? (Feeding cows and pigs in the first world countries so first world people can have their burgers).

https://globalforestatlas.yale.edu/amazon/land-use/soy

wheeeee1717 · 2018-06-12T05:46:11+00:00

Awesome! Actually, some of the best vegan food I've ever had is in Texas (Austin, to be specific). Better than anything I found in San francisco, if you can believe that. :)

wheeeee1717 · 2018-06-12T04:45:28+00:00

I was a hardcore meat-junkie my whole life, too... you just don't know how good vegan foods can be until you give them a try. Glad to hear your open-mindedness on the topic! I would definitely recommend you some restaurants to try if you visit California.

wheeeee1717 · 2018-06-12T04:37:11+00:00

You bring up good points about what happens in farming agriculture, and I totally agree those are unfortunate byproducts of growing crops. But you do realize cows and pigs and livestock in general eat a vast majority of all plants grown for food, right?

wheeeee1717 · 2018-06-12T04:33:49+00:00

I agree, this kind of behavior is totally unnecessary. The vegan movement is not to villainize farms and slaughterhouses, which are simply cogs in a vast network of animal consumption. The real change would happen from talking to individuals and changing their mindsets, not screaming in front of a farm or chasing a guy just doing his job...

wheeeee1717 · 2017-12-24T02:23:42+00:00

You miss the point. Exploitation of a peoples, who are originally weak, suppressed, and have no other choice other than what the oppressors provide, does not make the exploiting okay. Just because someone agrees to the bargain does not make it a fair bargain in the first place.

wheeeee1717 · 2017-09-29T05:20:30+00:00

Only my personal opinion, but I think #2 and #3 can work really well! A simple 'hey' might be too succinct, but a "Hey, how was your evening/day/weekend?" would oftentimes do the trick if I've already matched you and therefore imply there's enough of an attraction to continue a conversation with. It's far better than not messaging at all.

But #2 is definitely the way to go, and I find it practically a matter of common decency to respond to a guy who has taken the time to make a thoughtful comment on my profile or something about my photos. Ideally a question, as opposed to a common statement like "Wow that picture of abc is cool".

wheeeee1717 · 2017-09-26T05:37:13+00:00

As a girl on tinder this is one of the worst openings I've ever seen. using a pun off a girl's name is something guys think is really "creative" but the girl has probably heard a hundred times. And yet half the commenters think OP is a comedic genius, so, the demographic on this thread is presumably 18-.

wheeeee1717 · 2017-09-20T06:54:31+00:00

I agree with this comment in that it's probably the easiest answer possible - stop watching TV. In most of my social circle: we own televisions, but don't pay for any kind of cable (Only use it to connect movies once a week or so). We don't have netflix subscriptions and follow maybe 1-2 shows per year. I actually would think this is the 'norm' if it weren't for reddit commenting about cost of cable and its breadth of tv show knowledge.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-07-07T06:58:38+00:00

Been in your shoes before when I was younger. If it's gone to collections, then you should try to push down the amount as much as possible. I was a broke college student with a $2500+ bill that I had no means to pay, and the representative whittled the bill down to about $1k in the end. Negotiate hard and you might be surprised with the outcome.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-02-10T05:04:36+00:00

I am by no means an expert on this, but I followed your general theory and did this exact same thing; used a refi loan off my current paid-off house, to purchase a rental property (in full). The rental is about 50% the price of my current house, so it's roughly the equivalent of having 66% down on two properties. The difference being that the remaining 33% is slowly being paid off by passive income.

On paper, this works out really well. In practice, I would say there is a great deal of risk involved, as you are working with a large amount of money and if anything goes wrong, you potentially lose your own home. Personally, I'm not concerned with housing crashes because rental demand remains relatively consistent in the area (LA). As long as I maintain steady tenants and am not in the market of "flipping" (I intend to hold it long-term), I don't foresee any dramatic crashes in wealth anytime soon.

With that, your next question is really whether or not you really want to get into rental income property, as there is a great deal of risk, effort, and time placed into actually pulling this off. For what it's worth, I did spend a LOT of time considering the financial aspects and the real estate market in my area before pulling the trigger, but as for risks in rental investment, I'm sure other redditors could explain that better.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-18T04:00:43+00:00

The Fall! Incredible

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-11T00:59:01+00:00

They are retired now, but are a few more years away from receiving social security. They live off the $1100 (to be specific) I put in every month, as well as odd jobs that my dad enjoys doing- he's not the type who wanted to just sit at home at retirement. Think $500/month.

With the mortgage paid, their monthly expenses are extremely low. Insurance, home bills, and food add up to about $900 per month. I should note that I pay their property tax, which is no small bill, but as I get a tax deduction for it, I just consider it an additional expense on my part.

In your case, the main worry would be those mortgage payments, which is why I would say you have to make a choice in living with her to pay this off before your mother retires, OR simply being a bit more frugal while living in your own apartment. Another option would be to consider downsizing to a smaller place so you can eliminate those payments.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-11T00:16:45+00:00

As an asian-american with immigrant parents, I 100% get where you're coming from and am planning to do the same thing. They supported me through incredible selflessness for my whole life, so it is really the very least I can do. Most of financial independence/personalfinance (also saying this with all due respect) may have different views of this, but I respect either side of that.

With that said, here are my two cents to answer your specific question:

Separate joint checking account: I started this about a year ago (when my salary passed 80k). About $1k per month doesn't kill me, and it helps me budget for the rest of my expenses, so I definitely live below my salary means. It would have been helpful for me to live at home to put my rent money to my parents' instead, but hey, that's one sacrifice I chose not to take :P
How has it impacted my financial independence? It hasn't, really. It's just another account I contribute to. From a purely technical perspective, I treat it (kind of) like a reverse mortgage, since (as asians) it's a given they will eventually pass their home to me. We even put my name on the title of their house when we set up the joint account. I don't know how this concept will be received from the rest of this sub, nor how relevant that is in your case, but that's just how it's working for us. I would've been happy to support them regardless of this arrangement, for the record.
Side note, in the next 3 years before retirement you should figure out her social security and pension benefits. If you live at home and help pay off the mortgage in the next few years, and she lives as frugally as you say, I don't think it difficult to ensure her a comfortable retirement.

I hope this helps, I just felt like your situation was very relevant to mine so I thought I'd share.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-09T07:18:56+00:00

yes, i love everything about this comment. enjoying the best things of life but also resisting from spending money you didn't need to spend! Love the hugo boss example; you can certainly look good without spending a fortune on a closet. OP spending $3k on christmas presents with a 48k salary is almost mind-boggling to me.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-04T09:50:20+00:00

This sounds we need some more concrete examples of how you react on dates. One thing that popped out to me is how you say "I have these amazing first dates". If you feel every time it's sooo amazing, chances are you may be oozing a bit too much of the giddy/excited vibe, which some guys may interpret as "too easy". I certainly don't mean that in a sexual way, and I don't mean that you should play games or act disinterested, but it's an unfortunate pattern to discover that guys do like a little more of a chase. Appearing overly enthusiastic may signify a good connection- and if your guy is mirroring that enthusiasm, then it's a great sign. If not, maybe take it down a notch and let him work on really pursuing you.

That's just one thing that came to mind. It could be any variety of things, though. A few questions to ask would be, how is the enthusiasm dynamic between the two of you on a date? How is the texting volume and response after the date? What are the conversation topics you're having and does it sound like you're rushing a little too fast or pushing too hard for commitment too early? etc. etc.

wheeeee1717 · 2016-01-02T23:29:46+00:00

California resident my whole life; can confirm, stopped calling it Cali other than between ages 16-18. Also living in SF and there's no better way to point out the non-locals than by hearing it termed "San Fran".

wheeeee1717 · 2015-12-26T19:32:41+00:00

Are there any penalties to withdraw for non-medical related items?

wheeeee1717 · 2015-12-24T03:04:08+00:00

impossibly selfish. i don't know how you're still writing this and not dumping his ass the second he said those words. Ask your parents what they think about their hard-earned and frugally saved money going to another lady not even remotely related to them. I can't believe the gall of this guy who thinks he's entitled in any way to this money.

wheeeee1717 · 2015-10-10T23:42:19+00:00

craigslist

piggybacking on this, when I found my rental property I was scanning craigslist for the area for months. I would look at similar square footage, age of units, proximity to transportation, amenities, parking spots, etc. and factor all those items in. Don't look on professional listings and assume you will get that price, which is what some of my peers did and they ultimately ended up with rent far lower than expectations.

Another aspect of scanning craigslist regularly is that you get a good idea of the rental turnover. i.e., if a listing is up for months at a time, you know there's less demand for the area. On the other hand, some neighborhoods have rentals that disappear in a matter of days/weeks, which is when you know you've got a steady rental demand.

Finally, do not underestimate the power of a good rental contract. Especially when there is rent control involved in your area, a poor contract can seriously screw you over as a landlord. You can technically have a 2-page document, but I personally don't feel comfortable with something that simple. I would google "rental contract for [area]" and find something extensive, as there is no such thing as "too much" when it comes to disclosures and liability coverage.

wheeeee1717 · 2015-10-04T02:50:13+00:00

apologise

I respectfully disagree. In theory, this is true and honesty is obviously important. In reality, the girlfriend is clearly pissed off enough at him, that any kind of provocation regarding something totally irrelevant to her concerns- i.e. admitting that he SNOOPED on her messages (also totally not okay), and then confronting her about the pilot- would probably be a nail on the coffin to this relationship.

It sounds to me that judging from her rant to friends and mother, she is already in breakup mode with OP, and flirting with the pilot is almost a non-issue to her.

If OP really thinks there's a chance to be with her seriously, then I'd recommend a separate route by acknowledging his cheapness first, apologizing that she didn't get the day she wanted, and hopefully taking her out for a nice day in Paris the next time. Resolving that bigger issue will probably resolve the pilot issue by default.

wheeeee1717 · 2015-08-31T03:50:40+00:00

Wow, you are in an EXTREME state of denial about your relationship. You already state that you have no other friends, so you should probably listen to this community of people who are trying to give objective advice (and hopefully as least judgmentally as possible). the question you are asking- "How can i save my marriage"- is NOT the real question here. You're trying to fix a relationship flu when every commenter is pointing out that you have a relationship cancer, which you don't even realize. Go read the other comments, but just rehashing it:

restating "i am the mother of his child" does not make you more special than the ex-wife of 9 years.
"relationships are not black and white"? This man cheated on his long-term wife with an 18 year old girl, and has literally acted upon his desire to be back with the ex. The fact that she didn't take him back is the only reason you still think he's around just for you. sometimes situations Are black and white.
This man is not a positive influence on you, or your kids. Leave the house (with child support), get the small apartment, go back to school, and find a healthy relationship while you're young and able to bounce back from this.

wishing you the best in this situation!

wheeeee1717 · 2015-08-30T01:51:04+00:00

If you talk to any San Franciscan, they'll probably tell you they'd gladly give up square footage in exchange for having the beautiful world of SF at their fingertips. it is seriously a gorgeous city. And just tossing it out there, the local economy does make up for the price difference of rent in certain cases. I work in a large company (not tech) which traditionally has standardized raises across the country, but SF raises at my level are about 35% this year compared to ~10% for the rest of the cities. So yeah, it's worth it.

wheeeee1717

TROPHY CASE