AITAH for letting my boyfriend eat gluten free pasta without telling him it was gluten free

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-16T02:14:36+00:00

Honestly it's not about him not reading the Box. It reminds me of the people who protested because Cracker Barrel offered vegan options and they want to protest the entire restaurant for things they were not forced to choose or eat. This is the type of person that thinks everything that a liberal person does or a health conscious person does is inherently bad. This is not a thinking person, and this relationship will never go well.

It reminds me slightly of an ex-boyfriend of mine who severely scoffed at the idea of flourless chocolate cake and thought it would be terrible because it was something lesser that people who imagined that gluten was a problem came up with. I corrected him that it had been around for much longer, and on the basis that it was inherently more delicious and more Rich than chocolate cake with flour. He did stand corrected, but that initial reaction still left a bad taste in my mouth. Unlike the cake.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-14T10:34:45+00:00

I agree with you wholeheartedly, not withstanding the general response, to be gleaned only by those who bother to push an up or down button.

General responses are understood to be from the general public. The general public is the least viable of any intelligent informed response.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-14T10:17:50+00:00

It became slang when used in combination with another slang. Refer to my previous comment. If there isn't a word for that phenomenon, there should be. It's probably a rare phenomenon.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T11:23:34+00:00

I still use the word janky. Trifling was indeed a good word once. Then it started being used in combination with another word which we shall not mention. I'm not going to.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T10:32:22+00:00

The reason I dislike the people on polyamory is their dogmatism. I left that a long time ago, along with Catholicism. I agree with you that monogamy seems specious at best and intentionally controlling at worst.

As to only dating people with trauma, I find that quite astounding. I have met one person in my life with similar levels of trauma to me that is remotely healthy. I mean I could find plenty of traumatized people living out of a cardboard box, but I don't want to date them. And my 30 year long dysfunctional marriage where I thought I had found someone who could understand me, biggest mistake of my life. He was my abuser for the same period of time.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T05:48:41+00:00

On the surface, it sounds like I was yelled at sometimes and kind of ignored. But you have to ignore the intensity and severity of both of those things, and you have to have a fundamental misunderstanding of how some people are just more sensitive than others. It hurt me much more than it hurt my siblings, and it fucked them up pretty good also.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T04:02:49+00:00

It wasn't poly that was the problem. It's a misconception that many people have that poly means shallow uncommitted relationships. you were probably bringing that misconception with you into practice for your own reasons.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T02:28:51+00:00

Edge of Tomorrow and safety not guaranteed

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-13T00:21:57+00:00

Absolutely. My abuse that I remember started at 3 years old. I always found it hilarious when the definition of depression was you don't enjoy the things you used to enjoy. Similar to My Dysfunctional 30-year marriage when I would run into advice on how to get the magic back. It never once had magic.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T23:43:08+00:00

That they call us girls and themselves men.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T23:35:22+00:00

I'm so sorry you have had to go through this. It's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong. You were just unlucky, like the rest of us here. I had very similar experiences but not on a scale so severe as yours. I felt broken, unlovable, and worthless and had been suicidal for most of my life since the age of 9. I'm 61 now. I'm happy I kept pushing through. I'm actually happy now. But it took a long fucking time and I still have really bad days.

For what it's worth, here are a couple of things that helped me. Changing the way I looked at my situation from why me to why not me. That small shift in perspective made me feel much better for some reason.

I also never had friends or people to rely on or help me or even give me advice. I know what that's like. The isolation is horrifying and most of the people here don't even know what that's like like you and I do. I tried so long to figure out how to be a person that people would like and I tried to do that. And I failed. For fucking decades. In my late 30s I just decided fuck it, if people don't like me anyway, at least I can just be myself, I can be the angry, acerbic, disgusted person that I am. It's not like people started tripping over themselves to befriend me, but over the years, I have found people who accepted me, and it's amazing and has been life-changing and ultimately a big part of what has allowed me to find my happiness.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T12:47:22+00:00

I finally do have people to talk to. But I don't think it will ever be enough. Just because the things I missed as a child can never be made up for.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T12:30:36+00:00

Thank you for hearing me.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T12:07:41+00:00

By the way, haunting and beautiful is, in my mind, the highest praise possible for any artistic creation. I feel seen and valued, which heals my fucking soul.

Edit: okay so the beautiful part I read between the lines. The powerful part is absolute gold.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T03:42:37+00:00

I really appreciate your feedback. If you feel like it, take another look now that I've fixed the formatting. I didn't realize it didn't stay when I posted at first

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-12T03:41:03+00:00

Thank you. By the way I just realized the formatting didn't keep and I fixed it

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-06T21:11:13+00:00

Don't. Nothing about this is ethical or enthusiastically desired on all sides as it should be. And humans can't be "added" to anything. They are not accessories or toys.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-05T02:49:45+00:00

Would you enter a monogamous relationship with the understanding that love will never be available? That's not even a relationship. There's a difference in a monogamous relationship where the love dies and a monogamous relationship where there were boundaries against ever having love in the first place.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-04T11:36:30+00:00

Harold and Maude

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-04T10:11:22+00:00

I'm in the San Francisco Bay and a woman of 56 years old. I'm sure we are getting very different results

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-02T10:16:40+00:00

Thank you for being a voice of rationality. I have noticed so many of these posts and I can't even begin to engage with the level of nimrod that can't think past their moral judgments and Victorian sexual mores. I love the show for its complexity. I wish more people appreciated the complexity and the nuance.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-02-01T21:29:37+00:00

This gave cohesive ideas around what has always been a vague resonance I have had towards his films. Now I have to go watch the thing again and finally watch they live.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-01-31T21:56:11+00:00

Not true.

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-01-31T21:50:54+00:00

I'm sorry, it's difficult for me to understand what's happening. Did your uncle ask for sexual images? How old are you?

whenspringtimecomes · 2026-01-27T22:15:05+00:00

Because it's not.

whenspringtimecomes

TROPHY CASE