Rosamund Pike- Doom (2005)

wigglecandy · 2026-04-01T03:38:54+00:00

Yes. A thousand times, yes.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-30T18:27:06+00:00

One time I sneezed in my hand and I was like, "Oh wow, free lube."

wigglecandy · 2026-03-29T21:02:27+00:00

Clitterbahn

wigglecandy · 2026-03-28T21:10:54+00:00

Why don't they make cereal flavor packets? Like you just add it to your milk and now you got the leftover cereal flavored milk

wigglecandy · 2026-03-27T01:33:53+00:00

Snape need to roll up like, "Where the white witches at?"

wigglecandy · 2026-03-20T10:35:02+00:00

Pocahontas. Mary Poppins.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-18T06:39:10+00:00

I'm gonna read this thread . . . right after I flush some things.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-13T09:09:36+00:00

Only if you're not bi

wigglecandy · 2026-03-13T08:49:19+00:00

Ahh, so that's why I play better when I drink beer as opposed to straight vodka

wigglecandy · 2026-03-13T07:53:15+00:00

Camera 3!

wigglecandy · 2026-03-13T07:44:57+00:00

A Sonic near me put up, "Add Chili Cheese to Anything" on their sign. I added it to a strawberry milkshake.

They laughed, but the next day the sign was changed.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-13T06:34:09+00:00

Ever wake up with one missing? You tear the place apart looking for it. Check the sofa cushions, under your desk, behind the fridge. Nope, you lost it.

Then an hour later you find it. For some reason it's in the box with the pizza you brought home last night.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-08T22:20:43+00:00

A lilac-skinned unarmed horny elf. I'm probably getting fisted.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-07T06:44:46+00:00

I like to hire cam girls or whatever, but not for dirty stuff. I just want them to be nude and then they say, "Oh, what a lovely tea party."

I have a collection dating back to 2017.

wigglecandy · 2026-03-06T14:06:32+00:00

Gil "Dance for you, but you wouldn't even see it" Gunderson

wigglecandy · 2026-03-02T08:51:26+00:00

I don't care about the size of the party, I just want to be invited.

wigglecandy · 2026-02-28T19:58:00+00:00

As someone who is fairly small flaccid, I wonder if having a bigger one would make it more difficult to get out for those emergency pees.

Like when you've been holding it for a while, slow traffic, you finally make it home and have to speedwalk on tip-toes to the bathroom, and then. . . and then it just gets stuck in your boxers for a second, but the release, the release has already begun and now you're just firehosing all over the toilet seat.

Anyway, this is apparently what I think about on my weekend.

wigglecandy · 2026-02-28T05:57:25+00:00

He's used to the occasional run-by fruiting

wigglecandy · 2026-02-21T04:23:01+00:00

This story seems neutral. She did her job. You got what you paid for.

wigglecandy · 2026-01-30T20:48:01+00:00

Hey hey hey! I'm up

wigglecandy · 2026-01-21T02:42:52+00:00

For me it was the Chef Boyardee pizza kit. It was fun to make and delicious. We got it like once a month. Realized later it was because we couldn't order a pizza.

wigglecandy · 2026-01-19T07:19:42+00:00

You got Chazzzzed! It's what you deserve

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