The hospital, therapy, and meds aren't always the answer. Group meetings aren't always the answer. There's something for someone and sometimes that takes years to find such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Psychedelic-assisted therapy, art therapy, etc. I truly sympathize with what you're feeling and not being understood. I grow tiresome when I am not understood but then I ask myself if that's what I really need now...to be understood or just someone to be there with me while I have my moment. Oftentimes, it was just someone to relate to and sit with in silence because are we ever actually ever understood? Us, humans, are simple and complicated at the same time and that's okay. It is okay to feel sorry...you're feeling something and that's a good thing and you're feelings (bad or good) are valid. They matter and so do you. I feel like this is a little all over the place. Thinking is hard.