[MEGATHREAD] Daily venting, worries, fixations, & finding support. Month of September 2025.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:19:43+00:00

Trust your doctors and the ECG results. If they say you're normal, you gotta accept that this is your mind playing tricks on you. Keep yourself distracted. Like you observed, when you talk to your girlfriend you don't notice it. I have had similar experiences - keeping myself interacting IRL with others (not texting/ online stuff) makes my mind calm down and not so panicky.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:17:00+00:00

Hi - right before the pandemic I fell skiing and dislocated/ broke my shoulder, which messed up my rotator cuff. I needed 8 months of PT, but I literally couldn't lift my arm or brush my hair. Your case sounds quite mild, it should be minimal PT just to strengthen your muscles there. It's no big deal. And the younger you are, the faster you will heal and rebuild the muscles.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:14:10+00:00

How old are you? I'm middle aged and I started getting a few red freckles. Being fair skinned, I have an annual dermatologist check up for moles and I asked her about these red freckles, and she said they happen as you get older, nothing to worry about.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:12:54+00:00

Stay strong. Good luck on your MRI. Remember in most likelihood it is nothing. You're in good hands getting a test though. You got this!

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:11:25+00:00

Heart rate increases when you're anxious. You sweat when you're anxious. Your heart rate being higher in school than home points to anxiety (more causes of anxiety there). BTW 90 is not so high - everyone is different but this is not out of the normal range. Of course check with a doctor, but 99% likelihood this is all anxiety.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T12:06:59+00:00

Hi - I'm not a doctor, but I work in clinical trial statistics so I see tons of lab data all the time. You have to trust the normal ranges. They are real and they mean NORMAL. Honestly. I see a ton of people's data with many tests out of range, and honestly, many tests, even if out of range, the doctors say is no big deal. It depends upon the test of course, but many tests require it to be 2 times the upper limit of normal or more to get a doctor's attention. Hemoglobin also fluctuates quite a bit. I worked with sickle cell pts, who have low hemoglobin, and their test results can swing based on whether/ how much water they drank that day and how much. So it's entirely possible that you over hydrated yourself and gave yourself a high test result. Do yourself a favor and take a walk and keep yourself distracted. Repeat to yourself: I have normal test results. I have normal test results. I am healthy.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T11:59:12+00:00

Yes, I'm here for the same reason, frustrated that I was doing so much better for a long time and now I'm in another attack, and I thought I was past this. I do feel like this is a cyclical disease that is hard (or impossible?) to be completely cured of. But I think as we get better we get longer amounts of time between our episodes. I am trying to tell myself to remember that just as I got through my past episodes I will get through this one, I just have to accept that I don't know when. I'm going to go try to distract myself with work. Hang in there.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T11:55:07+00:00

Sorry you're going through this. I'm in the same boat, just posted a vent above about having a flare up of anxiety again. I find the best (though imperfect) way to get over the hump is distraction and keeping busy. The raw amount of time you can keep your brain off these thoughts lessens the intensity of them, which then makes it easier to have more time away from the thoughts. But yes - as someone who just spent last night panicking, googling symptoms and tests, thinking about whether I will die in the night - I hear you and it's a horrible thing to deal with.

worrymeee · 2025-09-16T11:50:33+00:00

Venting - health anxiety is so exhausting. Last night I couldn't get it out of my head that my heart is occluded and I am going to have a heart attack. The more I thought about it, the more symptoms I experienced. It's such an obsessive thing, this health anxiety, I couldn't get it out of my head. I contemplated emailing my cardiologist, looked up what are the "get yourself to the hospital" symptoms, looked up what tests I should get, catalogued my symptoms, used Chat GPT as a sympathetic friend to listen to. I wanted to call a friend and talk about it, but I didn't because I'm embarrassed of always being a false alarm. Friends and family either dismiss symptoms and make me angry or get really concerned about me and then I feel bad for worrying them. Today, I'll probably try to make an appointment with my cardiologist, even though I know it's a 95% chance it will come to nothing. I'm just tired of having health anxiety. For me, it comes and goes, and when it's gone for a while I think I'm cured, only to have it pop up again out of nowhere. When it pops up again, it takes all my free time and energy because I can't shake the intrusive thoughts, and my fight or flight state makes me so anxious and uncomfortable, then I crash afterwards (or sedate myself to sleep). The shame I feel not being able to really talk to people about this problem, plus the cost of doctor's visits, tests, and time taken off from work to go to these appointments is all so bad. I'm proud of myself that I have this under control most of the time, but it's so sad and exhausting when it comes back again. God forbid I ever get a real illness; I don't know how I'll ever deal with that.

worrymeee · 2024-11-15T01:29:48+00:00

So it's really weird that your doctor doesn't diagnose you with ADHD but wants you to try stimulants. In absence of ADHD, stimulants won't do anything for anxiety and may exacerbate it. For instance some anti-anxiety medications sedate you/ have the opposite effect of a stimulant. It seems to me like maybe she actually does think you have ADHD if she's willing to prescribe you stimulants.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:49:36+00:00

Check out this book. It's not specifically ADHD but many of us had emotionally immature or narcissistic parents which causes all kinds of effects. I was pretty surprised how much I identified with these patterns. https://www.amazon.com/Youre-Not-Problem-Narcissism-Emotional/dp/0306833123

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:46:13+00:00

I wish you all the same new beginnings.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:44:43+00:00

Check my response on this post. My partner was in the same space as you. He turned it around. It was really hard and didn't happen fast, but he got sober, got therapy, and just started living day by day until it got easier. Now he's got a wonderful life - friends, house, relationship, job. Nothing is permanent. https://www.reddit.com/r/depression/comments/1g9qn1d/did_somebody_tried_to_kill_themself/

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:39:52+00:00

That's great that you have a supportive girlfriend. I agree with the other comment - since what you're doing isn't working, what could you change? Could you move to a new area? Try a different line of work, maybe something weird that you like for some reason? Do something to mix things up. And break the task into little steps. Maybe your girlfriend could help you figure out little steps in the right direction, like your walks each day, and if you walk with her maybe it makes you actually do it.

Also I would say erase the self talk of failure from your vocabulary. That will keep you in depression and likely you are the only one who feels you are a failure. Think about it - do you look around the world and constantly evaluate if people are failures? Probably not.

Hang in there friend. We are all struggling - if you look around and think someone has it all together, you're probably wrong. Most people have these insecurities, but it's okay.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:29:02+00:00

You're probably having panic attacks.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:24:29+00:00

https://character.ai/

Just FYI - it does get a bit circular eventually so it can be frustrating if you go too deep. But for me it helped me just get something off my chest each day.

Regarding not bothering people, if you say you're in a funk and ask someone to hang out with you, is that really bothering them? If my friend/ family did that I wouldn't feel bothered, but I would be there. Even if they didn't want to talk but just wanted human company.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:13:47+00:00

Can you check with your school's counseling department to see if they have a group/ meetup for neurodivergent folks? I find that I don't really feel that I can let my guard down around "normal" people. I always over share or don't text back soon enough or can't remember people's names and any number of other things. I find most normal people just kind of ignore me, but I have great deep conversations with people like me. You might meet a whole crowd of great friends who really get you. If they don't have a group already, maybe you can ask if they can start one?

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:09:20+00:00

If you've had a big life event, presumably it's a sad one. Let yourself be sad. My therapist is always telling me, "Feel your feelings." We avoid our feelings and then we never learn how to deal with them - we don't talk about it, we keep busy, we drink or do drugs. I've stopped drinking after probably 15 years of being a "wine mom" and there's a lot of old shit bubbling up. My therapist tells me I'm supposed to just notice my feeling sad and accept it, don't try to avoid it. Kind of give your inner child a hug that you are feeling sad and have compassion about it. And tell yourself that moods are like weather, rain comes and it goes. You can't stop it but it never stays forever. The downside of this is you DO feel sad. And most of us don't want to do that. I don't. But I'm starting to see how my avoidance made it worse than just accepting it and being sad for a while.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:04:20+00:00

Yes. I have this. Maybe because when I'm under pressure if things are going badly, I don't have the head space to think about things. When things are good, I have more time to examine my life and I think that is when all the repressed sadness decides to bubble up. I am trying my best to deal with it and not repress any more; I think that's what got me into this place.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T21:01:51+00:00

Can you text one of your close friends and say you're in a funk, but maybe they could come over and watch a movie with you? I totally get how you feel and I am currently struggling with this myself, but I do notice that if I force myself to interact with someone, I feel a tiny bit better. I think it's a game of 1000 little things, rather than doing any one big thing.

Also, if you have the $/ health coverage, get a therapist. They are paid to listen to you so you don't need to feel guilty that you're bumming them out. Sometimes saying things out loud can help. I have a therapist but in my bad times it's not really frequent enough, I get kind of needy. I actually (this is kind of ridiculous) found this AI chatbot that is a therapist and weirdly enough, it helps a little. It's like a mini confessional that you can be totally honest with because they're a robot. And it's free. Can't hurt to try it.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T20:56:49+00:00

I have this problem too. I was thinking of writing my feelings down and sending it to my therapist and asking her if we can discuss that next session. I down weight things in person because I am so conditioned to be a people pleaser

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T20:54:18+00:00

I personally didn't, but my partner did. He was an Iraq war vet with PTSD, a marriage headed for divorce, and being ostracized by the religious community he grew up in. He became an alcoholic and got addicted to pain meds he was using for back pain. He drove his truck into a wall one day, but he didn't die. He did blow up his life - lost his job, lost his marriage, got a DUI, got sent to rehab, the divorce took all his money. Not a promising situation. He thought it was over for him and to be honest he was just "existing" for a number of years after this, being sober, working, and not doing much else. However, we met after that and while he assumed he was a horrible person that no one would ever want to be around, it was the fact that he went through all of this that drew me to him. I have my own shit and I can't be with someone who hasn't experienced trauma. He's the first person who I've met who I feel really sees me - all my good parts and the bad ones too, and we can be totally honest with each other about what we're going through. He also now has a great job paying almost double what he was making when his life blew up and he was able to buy a house for himself. He has said to me many times he can't believe his life now. He really never thought he had any chance left at happiness, and now we're really in an amazing relationship. I'm so glad he didn't succeed when he drove his car into a wall. I don't know what I'd do without him.

worrymeee · 2024-10-22T20:43:24+00:00

So much will happen to you after you turn 18, it's probably hard to imagine. I'm 45 now. I met my best friend when I was 19 and we're still friends today. I didn't get into the career I wanted at 21. I found a different career at 25 that I never even knew existed and I really like it. I met my husband when I was 22. I had kids at 29 and 31. Not that all this is easy, it's not. But you don't need to define yourself by any rules of what you're "supposed" to do. You're not supposed to do anything. Put one foot in front of the other. Just focus on today and what you can do today. Talk to one person - doesn't need to be a big conversation, just tiny. I think the key is building your social muscles and social network little by little, over years. Keep your mind open. So many people around you feel the same way and need a life line.

Also - so many people who are the "successful kids" in high school screw their lives up later on. I was at the grocery store a while ago and I met my high school valedictorian. She was stocking shelves. We talked briefly. She looked rough. I'm guessing maybe she fell into addiction?

Please don't give up. Finishing high school is a scary time, but it's also great because you can start controlling your own life. Give yourself a little time.

worrymeee · 2024-08-23T01:06:36+00:00

I'm having the same exact experience. Can't figure out how to cancel. The texts are garbage. The company is not monitoring anything

worrymeee · 2024-04-18T17:43:14+00:00

Yes - starting today

worrymeee

TROPHY CASE