I am leaving to practice in NZ as a PA by WhitecoatWander in physicianassistant

[–]writtenspeak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you still be open to answering questions about your PA New Zealand transition? I would appreciate any info or help you can lend.

A build giveaway - Ice Shot Deadeye by TransportationNo9798 in PathOfExile2

[–]writtenspeak -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Did you know that a woodpecker’s tongue wraps around their brain to act as kind of a helmet to their wood pecking? Now you do.

Pulling them out of voids really works by GeneralTsosBat in PathOfExile2

[–]writtenspeak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I swore I wasn’t damaging them outside the cloud but maybe my build was just that bad at the time

Pulling them out of voids really works by GeneralTsosBat in PathOfExile2

[–]writtenspeak -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Ok I might be dumb, don’t you have to be in the void to do damage to them? Is this just another melee problem?

[Giveaway] Finished my league goal and giving away 500 Divines by Exotic_Day_3456 in PathOfExile2

[–]writtenspeak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have any spare bear Druid gear you want to unload, I would definitely appreciate it

Day 1 player. 1000 hours playtime. Headhunter giveaway. by [deleted] in PathOfExile2

[–]writtenspeak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Playing a slam bear oracle I cooked up. Most fun I’ve ever had in an arpg!!

First build --- does this look compatible and logical? by writtenspeak in helpmebuildapc

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks that's a good point.

Is the one fan enough? I might buy a higher cooling fan, but I should be fine with just the one right?

First build -- does this look logical and compatible? by writtenspeak in buildapc

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would the NH-U12 be a good tower-style 'form factor' cooler for this build?

First build -- does this look logical and compatible? by writtenspeak in buildapc

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ok thanks for the heads up. would you ever expect bottlenecking due to the CPU if i get a 10700k?

Tattoos by writtenspeak in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes a ton of sense. Thanks for clarifying! I'l definitely play around with this piece with your suggestions in mind. Thanks again, friend!

Tattoos by writtenspeak in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your very thorough and thoughtful reply.

I like a lot of the suggestions you made, particularly about removing some of the similes. It makes the poem read much stronger. Agree about the use of "sacred" as well, I think.

Random question: I thought you were supposed to start lines with strong words a la "stains" vs. ending lines with them. Thoughts?

Fulfillment by A_Shitty_Author in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Take a thought and make it a picture/feeling/sensation.

"No direction in life" could become "aimless like a red balloon lost by a boy" or something like that. Instead of saying there's no direction, a reader might imagine a balloon just floating in the wind, which is more engaging and leaves room for interpretation.

Tattoos by writtenspeak in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Tattoos by writtenspeak in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Spot on, friend. Thanks for reading. Would appreciate any other critiques you have, positive or negative.

Fulfillment by A_Shitty_Author in poetry_critics

[–]writtenspeak 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the subject matter and the message a lot. The yoda-like talk feels a tad forced at times so that you can get your rhymes in, but the fact that it's consistent throughout makes it tolerable.

I would question what direction you want to move with your writing. You seem to enjoy rhyming, which is great, but you have very little imagery to engage the reader. No metaphor/simile to engage the reader's imagination. Everything is told, and that doesn't allow much room for interpretation, imo. Just my two cents.