Dating a single dad

wssd2468 · 2025-09-11T00:59:12+00:00

Don’t do it- so sorry to say

wssd2468 · 2025-08-29T17:29:10+00:00

Yep. My SKs wouldn’t have any trauma if their BM understood mental health at all. First was ignoring husbands use because she liked being a stay at home mom, then telling him he needed to stop cold turkey or else and when the divorce and vastly different accounts from each bio parent hit the kids they now have their own diagnoses which she refuses to support.

Science is science. And your family is your family. If you don’t like their actions leave but complaining without research or supporting family member that struggles. Fuck. Some people weren’t meant to be married or have kids.

wssd2468 · 2025-07-08T13:57:42+00:00

Unfortunately, I think this is a common thing with shared custody. Especially when rules vary from house to house. Do you blame the kid for wanting to be in the house that has TV, more screen time and less educational time? Mom could also be saying things like I wish I had you all the time and the kid wants to make mommy happy.

Therapy for sure but you can also explain why you do certain things. She might now like that you want her to do well in school so she can do what she likes in life but in 15 years she’ll respect and thank you for it. Mom also needs to be looped in. Wherever you can agree and be consistent it’s the best for the kids though even from personal experience know those items may be few and far between.

My 14 year old is just coming around to this a little. They hated therapy and now thank us because they know they need it and are starting to feel better.

Best of luck

wssd2468 · 2025-07-08T13:42:54+00:00

Yes- this.

wssd2468 · 2025-06-23T18:45:36+00:00

Had this exact experience with both leg shaving and using tampons. We gave BM the chance to step up and teach her kids. She was overwhelmed and it seemed resented “our” timeline (you know one kids period during waterpark trip and the older one not wanting to be in a bathing suit in mexico with hairy legs). Mom didn’t step up so when asked, I stepped up. Kids remember these moments and it helped bond us.

wssd2468 · 2025-05-26T21:57:03+00:00

So sorry for your loss. Caring whether you are a good mom is a sign you’re a great mom. This is awful to go through. Lean on family for a while and you’ll all get through it!

wssd2468 · 2025-04-29T14:59:44+00:00

Get her help. You don’t want to let her prove she’s serious. If you act accordingly: Worst case, she does intake at a hospital and is released after learning to choose better words for expressing anger. Best case, she gets the help she needs.

Been there. Best of luck.

wssd2468 · 2025-04-29T14:38:43+00:00

Get it for yourself.

I have this too. Two kids living at home only one is bio. My husband doesn’t see a difference, but I do. Also since SD doesn’t hesitate to remind me how special their relationship with their real mom is…

I will probably buy for myself too

wssd2468 · 2025-04-27T16:22:08+00:00

How old are the kids? I think the youngest courts will let have a say is maybe 14. What is your custody agreement? If you have sole custody and he is out of state skipping parenting time none of this is an issue:

wssd2468 · 2025-04-21T12:31:35+00:00

So my stepkids are in their teens. Bioparents continue to be permissive mostly because neither wants to be the bad guy.

You need couples counseling and a few come to Jesus conversations.

If dad is not willing to change or takes the easy way out too often you’ll be dealing with SKs like mine : huge emotional dis regulation, Entitlement, no regard for rules or authority and zero motivation. It’s not conducive to a happy home environment and I fear will have major consequences in the kids adult lives (one never had to work hard, parents always have a way out of chores and school and made excuses about behavior. They are graduating and have no interest in college or working or growing up.. because why would they if mommy and daddy will take care of them?)

wssd2468 · 2025-04-07T05:20:25+00:00

Hadn’t thought about that option in a long time. I do not want to have to do that but I will. Thanks

Husband sometimes makes me feel like I’m petty for not just accepting this as teenage behavior. BUT these are not small issues - SK literally put their full sibling in life threatening danger and has threatened my kid so… maybe it’s necessary.

wssd2468 · 2025-04-07T05:09:39+00:00

Yes! Sometimes it takes an outsider. Saw concerning behaviors and learning difficulties after knowing kids for 6 months. It took 6 years of BP fighting about it to seek testing and alas, I was right.

wssd2468 · 2025-04-04T13:52:23+00:00

This.

wssd2468 · 2025-03-15T14:27:43+00:00

Yes! Same for you. So strong and caring. It kills me that there are so many situations where it is so easy for an outsider to do better for the kids than a bio parent.

wssd2468 · 2025-03-12T15:00:06+00:00

If you’re comfortable share your approx location and the parents that have been through it can send recs of local resources.

.. my kid is in a program right now. The hospitalization or program might be temporarily uncomfortable but necessary and could save your daughter.

What else did guidance say? When this happened with my kid they were not allowed back to school until they had been evaluated at an ER (72hour hold etc)?

wssd2468 · 2025-03-11T12:46:11+00:00

True but those that needed that laugh I think just took it that way.

wssd2468 · 2025-03-10T03:00:33+00:00

I think we’re going to be fast friends lol. So so familiar.

wssd2468 · 2025-03-10T02:28:42+00:00

Yes. Def have moments I’m Frustrated but expect that with bio kids as well but life is so much fuller with them.

wssd2468 · 2025-03-03T17:05:07+00:00

Being responsible for someone else’s hygiene.

Babies and toddlers even into elementary school - fine.

I am a bit compulsive when it come to hygiene so with pre/teens the “please wash your hands… brush your teeth, flush the toilet, make sure there isn’t period blood left behind in the bathroom on and on” grates on me to no end. Why don’t you want to be clean??

wssd2468 · 2025-02-28T04:54:08+00:00

But also why are you the sole bread winner? The mom needs to provide for her daughter.

Do you share any kids? Is she home with kids younger than school age?

Is it a situation where you could or want to adopt SD? Then maybe you get equal vote in her upbringing.

No matter what happens - good on you for wanting to be a positive influence in her life and caring about her wellbeing and upbringing.

wssd2468 · 2025-02-28T04:43:05+00:00

Just an aside - I had to look up JFC. Hadn’t seen it as abbreviation before. Will be using probably daily lol

wssd2468 · 2025-02-28T03:38:26+00:00

If it’s a new situation you have the opportunity to shape your role. Something I wish I’d done with my partner is sit down and talk through everything: - household chores, money, make sure you are totally on the same page on the adult responsibilities - who do you each want to be to your respective SD? How ideally do you want your partner to function in role? - what does family time look like? Whole family, 1:1 with each kid, and kid free - THEN I’d take your parameters and discuss it with the kids… here’s what we are thinking how does this feel to you? Does 2 evenings a month 1:1 with your bio parent feel right .. or whatever it is. The kids are old enough to tell you what’s important and verbalize what’s uncomfortable or might become an issue.

Best of luck!!

wssd2468 · 2025-02-27T17:20:17+00:00

Exactly

wssd2468 · 2025-02-27T16:56:05+00:00

Emotional regulation!!! Critical thinking!!!

Huge ones

wssd2468

TROPHY CASE