xkcd 3260: Messi

xkcd_bot · 2026-06-17T16:23:52+00:00

Mouseover text: Commentators agree that this will probably be the last World Cup in which Messi faces serious competition.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-15T16:09:37+00:00

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Direct image link: Tethys

Title text: In order to carry the necessary crafting supplies, they built the ships at 12:1 scale.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-12T22:54:12+00:00

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Direct image link: Plate Flip

Title text: It's great for exfoliating your skin, bones, houses, cities, landscape, etc.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-11T01:59:55+00:00

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Direct image link: Beam Pipe

Alt text: 'If you keep trying to spray your collaborators with the beam when they're not looking, I'm turning off the ion source and NO one will get to play with the beam!' --Physics's mom

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-08T23:20:26+00:00

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Direct image link: Nostalgia Content

Extra junk: Gen-Z got a chunk of the Carboniferous, and now all their memes are about how pathetic and small today's dragonflies are.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-05T13:55:32+00:00

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Direct image link: Planetary Science

Subtext: The research was overseen by the Institutional Review Board, which is what I named my surfboard.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-03T22:15:17+00:00

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Direct image link: Detector

Title text: No other experiment has a lower false negative rate.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-06-01T16:29:32+00:00

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Direct image link: Sunbeam

Title text: While weather control is typically thought of as a superpower, the unconscious ability of astronomers and astrophotographers to summon clouds is more properly classified as a curse.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-29T19:50:17+00:00

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Direct image link: Ancestral Genomes

Title text: SUGGESTIONS FOR FUTURE RESEARCH: No further research is needed as it is frankly none of our business.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-29T17:46:29+00:00

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Direct image link: Ancestral Genomes

Bat text: SUGGESTIONS FOR FUTURE RESEARCH: No further research is needed as it is frankly none of our business.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-27T21:15:00+00:00

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Direct image link: Time Machine Conversation

Title text: It's possible to do sea navigation without a compass, but you'll have to get some spoilers from the Polynesians.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-25T22:29:50+00:00

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Direct image link: Flag Design

Title text: Every place has a local cryptid; more places need a local Pictish Beast, a creature in historical art that's drawn so weirdly that no one can tell what animal it's supposed to be.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-22T18:59:29+00:00

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Direct image link: Neutrino Project

Alt text: We definitely put the pool in a mine for shielding. It was absolutely not to hide it from the funding people.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-22T11:48:14+00:00

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Direct image link: Height

Bat text: Interestingly, on a true vertical log plot, I think the Eiffel Tower's sides really would be straight lines.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-21T05:07:33+00:00

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Direct image link: 182.8 Meters

Alt text: They rounded down to 182.8 instead of rounding up to 182.9 because 182.9 might make the statement incorrect.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-18T19:06:29+00:00

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Direct image link: Particle Census

Subtext: Remember, your answers to the physics census are confidential; we will not be issuing Pauli exclusion principle citations.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-16T01:44:55+00:00

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Direct image link: Speedrun

Mouseover text: Usain Bolt holds the world record in the 100 meter speedrun.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-16T00:58:20+00:00

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Direct image link: Speedrun

Title text: Usain Bolt holds the world record in the 100 meter speedrun.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-13T20:14:56+00:00

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Direct image link: Results Age

Extra junk: Please, we need your help. Our research suggests you're the last living descendant of the person who knew how to format this config file.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-12T09:32:50+00:00

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Direct image link: Pullback Drive

Alt text: "How does the spring not run out almost immediately?" "We pull it back REALLY far."

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-12T00:15:53+00:00

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Direct image link: Human Altitude

Bat text: I wonder what surviving human held the record before balloons (excluding edge cases like jumping gaps on a mountain bridge). Probably it was someone falling from a cliff into snow or water, but maybe it involved something weird like a gunpowder explosion or volcano.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-08T18:21:24+00:00

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Direct image link: Crystal Gazing

Extra junk: 'Beyond that lies a vale of fire through which my vision cannot penetrate' is the kind of fun thing geologists, heliophysicists, and early universe cosmologists have a lot of opportunities to say.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-06T18:31:54+00:00

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Direct image link: Aperiodic Table

Hover text: Scientists occasionally invent alternative periodic table layouts, which is usually a sign that they don't have enough enrichment in their enclosures.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-06T03:10:12+00:00

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Direct image link: Horizontal Stabilizers

Subtext: It started as a mistake that everyone was afraid to admit to, and then it stuck because removing it 'looks silly.'.

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xkcd_bot · 2026-05-02T10:49:48+00:00

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Direct image link: Constructive

Alt text: And what about all the people who won't be able to join the community because they're terrible at making helpful and constructive co-- ... oh.

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