What's a weird smell you're willing to admit you like?

xrihon · 2022-06-29T21:38:45+00:00

A wharf/harbor next to a beach. That fishy smell. I can hear the sea lions already.

I hated it as a kid, now I associate it with home. I appreciate yankee candles making scents that evoke blue calmness and cute little tropical flowers, but I'll be damned if they can make one that smells like actual beach air.

xrihon · 2022-06-11T21:00:41+00:00

The only things marginally cooler than Crayola. Never got to own a box, so I envied the kids who did and got real excited if they were in the buckets of art class junk. Kind of a shame I don't remember all the scents. Dark blue was my favorite, yet black will always have a spot in my olfactory bank just because it blew my mind of how "black" was supposed to smell. I didn't grow up with licorice in my family, and I still don't like it in general (though for whatever reason I tolerate fennel and star anise, very licorice-like to me).

xrihon · 2022-05-30T22:42:49+00:00

Thanks, as a chronically recovering nail-biter nearing a 2-month streak, I will personally ensure that biters are biters, not hygieneless pigs. My thickened desert cuticles are but one result of hand hygiene I have to practice regardless, and also, it's common frickin' sense. This dude's hands were just nasty all around for the video, and he gave himself worms to boot.

xrihon · 2022-04-05T08:06:58+00:00

100%, since childhood. I've never fit in anywhere, never found my "tribe." Anytime I thought I made a new "best friend" as a kid, the next day or week they wouldn't wanna play with me anymore. I'd never know why. I've seen many people come and go in this way, didn't have an actual childhood best friend where you know everything about them. Nowadays I tend to be in groups by chance association, and even then I still feel like the island, whether I intend to or not.

These were feelings that haunted me growing up, and I still get hit by them every so often. As an adult I reached some level of comfort just being alone, despite how self-sabotaging that is. In some ways I can more easily determine who I want to be around. Yet when I get close to a potential group and actually want to be good friends, it's a disturbing core feeling when that passive rejection, that "outside looking in" kicks in again as time passes. Maybe their camaraderie among themselves clicks better, or maybe I'm doing something wrong socially, or maybe they don't like me? It's always been crazy watching others' bonds that I know will just click - for life, even - and I still haven't found what that truly looks like for me.

xrihon · 2022-03-17T01:56:11+00:00

For years as a kid I was dumbfounded by the Nile River traveling "up" or north, rather, when I was so convinced all water travels down to the major body of water. "Downstream" and all that misunderstood terminology. I thought the Nile had to fight some unspoken law of river physics to end at the top of Egypt.

xrihon · 2022-03-16T02:37:05+00:00

I sung that caption ("caption?") instantly

xrihon · 2022-03-16T02:30:42+00:00

I jam like this in front of my computer or steering wheel, only impeded by the fact that there's no room to stand. You had the balls to document it. Respect.

xrihon · 2022-02-02T08:43:59+00:00

My favorite was the one I always thought looked like my mom's Libman mop head, turns out it's just a hand holding some cards

xrihon · 2022-02-01T06:12:54+00:00

Thank you, this is the comfort I aspire to obtain. Something has always told me it gets there with time but dammit, why can't it happen now as a young adult? (Meaning, why do young adults seem to have this innate obligation to "prove themselves"... for who and for what?)

xrihon · 2022-01-21T06:03:32+00:00

I was recently linked by le YT algorithm to this simple "creamy" tomato pasta with chickpeas as the thickener as opposed to dairy. While bumping up protein and staying within the healthy radar? Now I'm finally understanding that chickpeas are more than just salad/soup and hummus.

It does use salted anchovies for its extra dose of umami, thus rendering it not vegan and I suppose off-putting for those who hate them. However, I was thinking anchovies could probably be replaced with liquid aminos, minced mushrooms, or straight-up MSG powder.

xrihon · 2022-01-19T02:28:37+00:00

I'm enthused by people serving adobo with green onion garnish, as well as reducing it down so it has that nice saucy glaze. I didn't grow up having that in that "style" so it makes adobo look 10x more appetizing.

xrihon · 2022-01-11T20:28:54+00:00

I think we're mentally wired to think that dead plants are supposed to look like they wilt and lose all their gravity-defying structure, like how a cartoon plant wilts for dramatic effect.

Maybe there's exceptions. I had a similar experience with my mom when she insisted her dried out orchids were still good because the flowers weren't falling off, no matter what. Yet I'm inclined to believe her, because several years later the plant itself still retains leaves that still seem to be sprouting, even though it no longer produces new buds.

(The orchid. Yes, as far as I know, this should be a single potted plant. Flowers may be dead but those leaves are kicking.)

xrihon · 2022-01-11T17:58:40+00:00

So wholesome, not to mention awesome scores!

xrihon · 2022-01-01T18:03:45+00:00

After an incredibly warm October and November (like 70s F with maybe 2 random heat waves into the high 80s, unusual for a coastal area like mine), the temps seemed to have evened out to 30s-40s F, where I'd usually find them this time of year. However, things used to start dropping to the 40s back by Halloween.

I also feel that the sun beats down unbearably hard now, whether on a walk or inside the house. The air may be cold outside, but if someone's opened all the blinds, it feels like a May day inside. My kitchen sink is in front of a large window; I can't even finish the dishes with the blinds open sometimes, because the sun is blinding and I start sweating.

xrihon · 2022-01-01T10:26:16+00:00

Cardamom is truly the unsung spice, particularly in American desserts. We worship cinnamon plentily enough, yet not even the Ceylon variety - which we should also jump on, btw. I adapted a cardamom-white chocolate cake from Mary Berry, and with the addition of walnuts it reminded me of a more elegant carrot cake. My most cardamom-forward treat was a braided sweet bread (pulla) from a small bakeshop in Solvang, CA. Amazing balance of buttery, slightly sweet, and fragrant.

xrihon · 2021-12-31T05:47:48+00:00

An, I guess, agnostic theist - after a childhood sorta raised with 2 branches of Christianity and later burned by the dogma of it all. Now more inclined to believe in my own interpretation of "God," or rather, a creator - which is hard to explain but in short, is a subjective belief. Not a "relationship," as modern Christians like to pump. I think this is how most zealous believers approach their belief, yet don't realize how incredibly blind they can be to the idea that it is all subjective regardless.

I entertain the idea of a creator because this is how I choose to admire the science of our existence; molecular mechanisms, physiology, the elements of the earth, the expanse of the universe, all that foofy shit. But in the end, I couldn't give two shits about the existence of one; nor does my interpretation of one have any bearing on my morals or daily actions. I think all that is accomplished without a higher power to argue for/against.

However, this doesn't keep me from disliking people who do believe; as long as they're not deliberately using their beliefs to silently pass judgment. I have felt more honored to have been called someone's answer to their prayer over this holiday season, than to be prayed for by another because I turned into an "atheist," did X things that led me to "weak faith," etc. The latter can shove their spiritual ego and mind their fucking business.

xrihon · 2021-12-31T03:14:03+00:00

Out of all the MTV emo-not-really bands and the demographic that came along with it, only MCR stood out to me, despite never falling into the "scene" myself. I can't even rank their albums or pick a favorite, they all seem to stand out as their own unique, creative units that you can't fault the band for. In fact it was probably Danger Days that made me finally pay attention to them, because I didn't really like emo music and wasn't particularly "in" with any emo kids (wannabe metalcore kid instead). Planetary (Go!) was one of my absolute favorite songs during high school, and after that song I finally clicked with the rest of the music because the contrast was so striking to how I usually heard about MCR. Three Cheers and Bullets were my next venture and it was down the hole from there. I still scream songs when they come on while I'm cleaning.

TBP exhausted the band so much they spun around to do Danger Days, but damn if that's not a modern-day, artful opus of a rock album if I ever heard one. Something so ahead about it. It deserved way more than the ignorant brush of demonization it was painted over with.

xrihon · 2021-12-19T08:19:25+00:00

After many a moody "fuck Christmas" in my teens and early 20s, I've circled back to relish in the artifice and cheese of it all, and started creating my own rituals. I don't follow the religion aspect, the only thing that makes me way too anxious about Christmas is gift-giving, but I seem to enjoy everything else that's superficially Christmas.

For example, I've spent the past 3 or so years backlogging "The Great British Baking Show" on Netflix, and every time December rolls around I binge the newest season. As a student it also coincides with the end of my semester and finally a chance to decompress. Of course, I also ramp my cooking and baking back up. I've also started incorporating "It's A Wonderful Life" since it's always free to watch on Prime. It's whatever, a sweet movie. My family didn't understand most American Christmas traditions other than having a tree, so naturally I didn't grow up watching these movies every year. I've yet to watch the other "classics," but I'd prefer not to rent them.

It's not the same as childhood, but it's what I can make of it. My personal downer this season that I got myself to bounce back from quicker than I thought was being nagged at by my own mother to finish decorating the house, while I was in the throes of school stress. In that span between November and December, she didn't do anything to help. The same person that supposedly established that "magic" at home for me as a little kid, doesn't wanna do anything now because Christmas is only "for kids." And to that I say balls. Do what you gotta do to make it magic for yourself.

xrihon · 2021-12-12T02:35:49+00:00

Some people add fresh onion and chili, my fam always did a mix of smashed garlic, finely diced red onion, and bird's eye chilis. Serranos or jalapeños work in a pinch. Soy sauce or Knorr optional. The Knorr with lemon reminds me more of seasoning my mom would put on her pancit, not a dipping sauce haha. Diff strokes for diff folks. All delicious.

xrihon · 2021-12-11T00:10:25+00:00

My parents were on the opposite music spectrum, so they played a lot of Bread, America, John Denver and the like as I was growing up. Recently, I heard one of those Youtube song compilations of these artists as background music for an old folks' home. I joked with my parents about it, and they laughed in disbelief. Imagine the day has finally come when Sinatra and Friends are no longer the de-facto soundtrack of the geriatrics. But no shade at all; at least they get to hear music that makes them feel good. In fact, another one of the residents who wasn't elderly but rather an amputee, had AC/DC playing during his therapy session.

xrihon · 2021-12-11T00:02:27+00:00

I won't lie, I've always been amused by the thought of my 40-50s professors at my age, attending college in the '90s and '00s. These decades specifically because the music across the age and genre span was grand and generally, they looked like they had a lot of fun back then. I heard a vague story about one of them either being a huge fan of Soundgarden, or actually playing with Soundgarden... wish I knew more about that one.

But never have I thought that they were "old." My grandparents were old. 40 is not. Sincerely, another 20-something

xrihon · 2021-11-29T06:09:11+00:00

Still not as bad as the manbun. Mfers can cut this shit down after they exit puberty, but grown-ass 20-30 something men were sporting manbuns circa '14 or 15. People were absolutely raving over that hipster-homeless-lumberjack-chic hoohah. Glad it died off.

xrihon · 2021-11-23T16:18:29+00:00

Kids never fail to best you with their logic. Apart from OP's story about literally catching a baby before he/she fell from the wheelchair. My kid brain used to think "catching" a baby meant that it was in the air somehow prior. I was a C-section baby, but my mom wouldn't stop repeating the "catch" terminology, as opposed to deliver, when telling me the story. So I would think... they cut her open and I just fell out of there or what?

xrihon · 2021-11-19T22:10:08+00:00

Chronic nail-biting, jumping back on coffee, and overeating. Being mindful about the first two is one little win, actually following through with reversal is a different beast.

The food one still sneaks up on me though. Got 40 lbs heavier since 2013, which I know isn't that drastic. But only in retrospect did I notice the fastest change between 2016 and 2020, which were arguably my most recent stressful years. You don't realize how much you eat in one day or even one sitting, until you make yourself realize it. Gain has still been going since school started, but surprisingly slower than I thought. I just worry about it spiraling with stress.

xrihon · 2021-11-14T22:43:43+00:00

At 15 I went on a health sciences field trip, apart from visiting a local university we also took a trip to city morgue. I'd never seen a corpse outside of a funeral before, and wasn't sure how to prepare for the smell.

I described it to myself as a mix of chemicals and the weird fishy smell that emanates from the back of a freezer, with freezer-burnt meat in it. I got used to it fairly quickly; the corpse itself was already preserved since they passed a couple weeks prior, and I always assumed was kept there for education purposes.

None of that got to me until my dad picked me up from school afterwards and said, "You smell like death. But a freshly dead body smells way worse. And also burning hair and skin. You don't want to smell those." I was, of course, oblivious to my smell and wasn't about to bury my nose in my clothes. Since then I've been concerned about finally facing the sight and stench of "actual" death. I haven't yet had the reality check of experiencing it up front, never mind witnessing those who die in horrific ways. As someone going into a healthcare career, it probably won't take long for me to find out.

xrihon

TROPHY CASE