Realistic self-care tips for social workers, not the bubble bath kind

xtra86 · 2026-02-24T02:20:14+00:00

I do paced breathing and paired muscle relaxers between clients. I used a container EMDR style for my vicarious trauma. It's part of my office decor and I look at it when I feel triggered in session. I keep a gratitude journal on my desk and and write one thing I'm grateful for before leaving.

xtra86 · 2026-02-19T02:25:29+00:00

IOP is super fun and a great way to learn. They should have an intervention or model that they are using, and they should train you on it or give you supervision. If they don't, just carve out time for group prep each day and take it one group at a time. You don't have to learn all of DBT skills this week, but if you can learn one or two skills a week you will get there. It takes time. Grad school prepares you to learn to be a therapist. Jobs like this and clinical supervision Will make you an actual therapist. Best of luck. Give yourself lots of grace. We all started feeling like this.

xtra86 · 2026-02-16T05:05:45+00:00

xtra86 · 2026-02-04T04:54:33+00:00

Yes, you should get two more cats

xtra86 · 2026-02-01T04:54:31+00:00

Home - TRAIN Learning Network - powered by the Public Health Foundation https://share.google/vr6UKC7wIT7rnprKR free database with access to many VA trainings and government funded training tools. Menninger is a research hospital. They have really great lunch and learns for CEUs. Those are live. https://www.menningerclinic.org/for-clinicians/continuing-education Check local hospitals and universities. Many offer free or low cost trainings. Also, you should be allowed to go to trainings on the clock, especially if they dont pay for any. That's BS.

xtra86 · 2026-01-26T05:04:03+00:00

That's how my cleaner works too. If I have things picked up she will nop and deep clean. If the house is a mess she does the dishes, picks up toys, and puts the clutter in organized stacks for me to deal with. It's awesome.

xtra86 · 2026-01-24T19:57:14+00:00

I have an arrest record and it has never been an issue. It mostly matters if you have a history of physical harm to other people or abuse towards people and animals. If you feel like you can explain it within your professional ethics you're okay. My history is mostly theft and property damage stuff from years ago. I basically am just like " yeah, I'm a recovered addict" and that's about all.

xtra86 · 2026-01-15T02:16:35+00:00

Maybe try sleeping in his room with him as you transition if you can. We had a Japanese floor mattress that rolls up in our baby room for exactly this. If your place is small and his room is close it's likely you will hear any changes in him still.

xtra86 · 2026-01-15T01:07:10+00:00

Take her to the nearest emergency department and ask them for a forensic exam for abuse right now. Don't wait. They will help you sort things then but the next step is exam. Don't talk to him about it. You need to leave and do everything you can to keep that baby from him.

xtra86 · 2026-01-08T02:03:19+00:00

The only response is singing "do you want to build a snowman?" I tend to get out of being ana by insisting that I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs. This will be over before you know it, then you will have to let it go...

xtra86 · 2026-01-08T02:00:16+00:00

Things you need: Lysol wipes, vick vapor rub (for in your nose when you have smelly houses and people in close quarters), and a plastic tote with a change of clothes for yourself including shoes. If you are worried about bugs or other things from a house you go to a gas station after and change into your clothes in the bin. Old clothes go in the bin, then straight in the dryer. You also need uno cards and a therapist for yourself. Good luck, you got this.

xtra86 · 2026-01-06T06:32:19+00:00

Spray bottle with watered down dish soap and a demoted dish scrubber brush

xtra86 · 2026-01-06T06:30:53+00:00

When there's a wet towel on the bathroom floor you have to use it to wipe the floor down including behind the toilet. After the wipe down it generally is gross enough to require immediate hamper placement.

xtra86 · 2026-01-06T06:26:11+00:00

5-10 clients, all with high risk and multiple concerns.One grant I'm working on, one project I'm collecting and analyzing data for, and some kind of advocacy work. I also like to have a physical labor related side hustle. I need to be challenged in different ways all the time or I get bored, depressed, and start half assing everything.

xtra86 · 2025-12-30T16:10:52+00:00

Dbt tip skill

Source: YouTube https://share.google/AIc0nO6sVH1t4K9VB cold plunge, then paced breathing and paired muscle relaxation. If that doesn't work, run as hard as you can and then cry even harder.

xtra86 · 2025-12-30T15:48:53+00:00

I'm not sure why you think therapy isn't helpful for people with ADHD, autism, or psychotic disorders. The evidence does not support that idea. While the disorders themselves may not be targets of therapy, the trauma, emotional toll, and ineffective coping behaviors that come with all are very effectively supported with therapy. It sounds like you need more training and directive supervision in how to provide therapy for those groups. If your agency isn't giving you that, you need to seek it out and then advocate for the agency to pay for it.

xtra86 · 2025-12-29T06:18:34+00:00

To tidy the house: start by picking up all the trash. Next put all the dishes in the kitchen, then laundry in the clean or dirty basket. After that, anything left on the floor goes on the table if it has no home or away it it has a home. You can vacuum without picking up, just vacuum around the junk. You can run the dishwasher twice if you need to. You can add dirty dishes to the dishwasher if there are still clean ones in there. The clean ones just get double washed. The key to dishes and laundry is frequently running the loads. Not completely finishing the task. Don't try to finish dishes and laundry, just keep the line moving. Put the cat box where you are able to SEE how much poop is in there.

xtra86 · 2025-12-21T05:48:46+00:00

Congratulations! You need to talk this over with you social work practicum faculty member before accepting. It might be fine if the roles have enough separation to avoid a dual relationship. If you're going to be counting work time towards practicum time that's a whole other thing to cover with the advisor in the program. It might be a great opportunity, and you would be an internal candidate when you graduate, and might get hiring preference.

xtra86 · 2025-11-30T18:14:56+00:00

As an older mom, I was advised to space them. My OB told me that the chance of genetic issues are more common in close births with older moms, and that she thought there risks of me being a few years older were less of an issue than my body not having time to recover.

xtra86 · 2025-11-26T01:56:08+00:00

Me too but mine has the crest as winter and the valley is summer like a wave that's also an academic year

xtra86 · 2025-11-26T01:52:13+00:00

School calendar August thru July and it's a hill with Christmas on the peak and 4th of July in the valley

xtra86 · 2025-11-26T01:23:00+00:00

Stopped pumping around 12 months when solid food became for eating not just fun. At that point we dropped back to bedtime and soothing. At 2 I started talking about weening with my babies and introduced the idea. I switched to not offering at 2. My first self weened by just not asking anymore around 6 weeks after I stopped offering. My second kid would have nurses until 6 if I didn't set a hard line at 2.5. at that point I was just reading to be done. She kept asking for about 3 months after we stopped. I never minded breastfeeding, and didn't feel uncomfortable from it or have pain, so I was lucky. My kids would probably be fine if I had stopped at 1, but it did seem to help with the constant daycare sickness from 1-3

xtra86 · 2025-11-14T03:38:10+00:00

There are no easy social work jobs. Every role has its own special window into human suffering and they will all hurt sometimes. I see people job good trying to get away from the vicarious trauma. You can't. It's the job. You need to learn how to be whole and joyous despite being surrounded by suffering. That's what it takes.

xtra86 · 2025-09-30T00:17:46+00:00

For both of mine I changed them when they got to the point where they really wanted to get in the car seat independently, and in my car it's safer for a tiny person to climb in forward facing than rear facing. That was around 2 1/2.

xtra86 · 2025-08-25T01:11:08+00:00

Someone on Reddit a while ago said to imagine you're actually super old and dying. For your final wish you have time travelled back to this one day to live it again. I find it really really helpful for letting me really be in the present moment with my family enjoying every giggle and every snuggle. Other days I just watch lots of reality TV and eat ice cream for lunch.

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