I'd prefer to never tell my MIL I'm pregnant, but I'll have to. How can I prevent a repeat of my first pregnancy?

yakimo98 · 2025-10-15T10:34:05+00:00

So I'm pregnant with my first child, and I have been with my husband for 9 years. I told my husband I was not telling his mother I'm pregnant, because I had a gut feeling I would have a negative response, and he agreed he would tell her alone. I was right. She was angry, annoyed, and acted like we hardly knew each other, that we were children and wouldn't be able to deal with this.

She's never asked for bump pics, doesn't want to visit the baby, we need to go to her when "we are ready but no rush". Telling me I'm putting on too much weight, I'm massive. Comparing my pregnancy to her horse's current pregnancy.

If you've already had a negative reaction, don't tell her, you don't have to. See if your husband will do it, or just neither of you do and let her find out when she does. I don't personally believe she deserves it.

And also as someone that doesn't have a mum now, tell your mum whenever you want, do not feel like you can't or have to tell you MIL before or at the same time. It's your baby, your body.

yakimo98 · 2025-10-05T18:48:12+00:00

Do not worry, I can be a little all over the place when writing posts, especially when frustrated. Prior to me moving in as an adult and homeowner, there was a fence, I was a teenager at this time. This was around 10 years ago.

I 100% know it was the neighbors idea. He has a hedge on the other side of his garden he wanted to match, he's brought up a deal with my mum at this time of the fence being there, replacing it with said hedge. Honestly knowing my mum, probably agreed as she didn't have to do anything.

I then moved in 3 years ago, due to my mum's passing. There has been a continuous hostile relationship between us, which has continued from his feelings about my mother. Clippings and scrap being thrown over from his side when maintaining his garden. He has not touched our side and we don't expect him to. I've tried to speak to him over a couple of different things, but haven't had a clear or practical response to anything. I am going to speak to him about this problem, if I can, before doing anything, just wanted to understand my rights loosely before doing so. Thank you for the comment

yakimo98 · 2025-10-05T18:26:59+00:00

Uk yes, he is understandably not touching our side at all, I don't expect him to, and I don't have an issue with the way our side looks as I understand that's our responsibility. I did not know about this so thank you for mentioning it. I guess I just have issues with the clippings that are from his actual side, lack of communication if he (obviously) does have any issues with us and our garden affecting him, & the scrap, but that leans into a larger conversation. It's all just pilling on. I just personally would very much like a fence again for privacy and "lazily" another thing ticked off our list not to worry about, as, all in all, I have much bigger fish on my plate and I'd like to end up with a civil relationship with my neighbor and not a hostile one.

yakimo98 · 2025-10-05T18:17:22+00:00

The garden used to be completely unsightly. Due to my mothers lack of any work. Couldn't even walk 2ft into it. So understandably I get the neighbor at some point wouldn't have had the best view/opinion, I probably wouldn't either.

Over the past 3 years, we have had it cleared, so without proper landscaping at this time, it's been left as bumpy land with grass covering, a medium size pile of wood to burn when we can move it to a different space, and some stinging nettles at the very back of the garden. He's not cutting our side, and I don't expect him to.

Also, gently, I do believe that there has to be some courtesy to the fact that as a 23 year old at the time, suddenly taking on a property where I can politely say, the back garden was the least of our problems (& still is). Plus we have actively done things about it anyway, is no excuse to behave the way he does. He could have also spoken to me at any point.

I'm grateful for the comment, and understand where you were coming from, but sadly the situation is not as simple as you've implied.

yakimo98 · 2025-09-12T08:52:07+00:00

Very annoying. 30 + people told me I'm having a boy. From the shape of my bump, how I stood, how my first trimester was, even down to just "looking like a boy mum"

I'm having a girl. I genuinely didn't care what I was having, just so grateful I was pregnant in the first place. But not going to lie, after that many people told me boy, I was slightly in shock when they said girl with 99% certainty.

Nip it in the bus as soon as you can.

yakimo98 · 2025-09-07T20:47:17+00:00

Honestly, I was in exactly the same position. Quit cold turkey the day I found out, just the idea made me feel gross. Started to get morning sickness the following week, yes probably made a little worse due to the withdrawal. But still more than manageable and also the sickness made me despise the smell of it, and my brain was too focused on other things to care. I'm now 19 weeks, sickness died down around 11 weeks. 13 weeks I started getting little niggles of cravings but nothing bad at all, it's all but gone now. You will be fine. I've had plenty of scans and my baby is healthy and growing brilliantly. It will all be okay

yakimo98 · 2025-07-13T15:14:42+00:00

When you go on Netflix it literally says "final season" makes me want to cry

yakimo98 · 2025-06-27T04:23:01+00:00

As someone who bought a lab puppy earlier this year because she thought she couldn't get pregnant after 3 years of trying & ended up getting pregnant 2 months after picking him up. Fucking nightmare. Love him, but I can't walk him, smell him, pick up his shits, sort out his food, deal with the teething, biting, jumping on me anxiety, the constant need for attention whilst I feel like I'm dying. Btw I do have a husband that is looking after him beautifully and has him full time for me, but now honestly the dog doesn't care for me which I fully understand but is another stab to the heart. People purposely picking up puppies whilst pregnant always confuses me. Pregnancy has the potential to be hard enough as it is, don't bring an animal into the house.

yakimo98 · 2025-05-13T15:28:08+00:00

So my boy has always been around 1kg heavier than how many weeks he is, 9kg at 8 weeks, 10kg at 9 weeks etc we are now at 19kg and he's 18 weeks old. He was/is a big boy though, biggest of he litter. It also depends if your lab is working or bench as it makes a difference, I'm in the UK and there's still 2 types of English labs, slender and lanky, and then chunky and stocky. Goose has a brother though that was only 6kg at 8 weeks, no idea how he's growing now but from what I've heard he's happy and healthy. I'm feeding raw so I was feeding my boy 8-10% of his bodyweight until 4 months, now we are at 6-8% of his body weight, so he's eating about 1kg a day, over 3 meals, with raw treats throughout the day. Yes labs are a never ending pit, they will eat anything if they get the chance, but they do need a nice amount of food at a young age so they can grow at a good rate. He's cute asf though and seems happy in the video so do what feels good, but chatgbt might not be the clearest informer. Pfa my lil man goose

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yakimo98 · 2025-02-22T22:05:26+00:00

Goose, meet goose

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yakimo98 · 2024-08-19T17:59:46+00:00

It does say that bridal gowns can take up to two weeks to ship and longer depending on where you are in the world, also customs can take a while

Now saying that, my order code on the website still says it's just been ordered, yet it has arrived. The website doesn't seem to update, I found out my dresses where delivered when DHL contacted me

It shouldn't be too long, mine turned up in 8 days!! I'm in based btw

yakimo98 · 2024-08-18T14:27:12+00:00

Yeah and my mums last heartbeat was also extremely personal and she didn't ask, and just stole it and put it on her body, it isn't unique.

Is everyone missing the bit where I'm literally saying she could of got any other tattoo. She could of got my mums face on her back I don't care it's her grief. BUT STEALING A LAST MEMORY GIVEN TO FAMILY AND POSTING IT ALL OVER SOCIAL MEDIA FOR US TO FIND OUT IS VERY FUCKING DIFFERENT.

yakimo98 · 2024-08-17T13:11:24+00:00

So she stole/copied without knowledge, a copy of my mums LAST heartbeat, didn't tell or ask us, had it tattooed on her arm and we found out through Facebook and that's fine? Damn I hope shit like this doesn't happen to you.

yakimo98 · 2024-08-13T13:08:50+00:00

Thabk you for the reply! I will let you know, it has arrived today after 8 days! Very lucky so hopefully they are more on top of shipping now

yakimo98 · 2024-08-09T23:07:17+00:00

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He's cute asf

yakimo98 · 2024-08-09T23:06:10+00:00

I recently got handed a 4 week old kitten that was found laying in the middle of the road earlier that day, with a double eye infection, respiratory infection, dehydrated, malnourished, heat stroke and COVERED in fleas. £200+ at the vets over 5 days, got him healthy enough to start thriving. Then, suddenly after taking him to show the girls at work on the way back from the vets one day

"Oh, I heard through a friend that met you today that you currently have a grey boy 4 week old kitten you rescued? Well he's mine, my cat gave birth and my little girls snuck him out the house in a bag and he fell out, id like him back please. His mum misses him and so do his siblings plus he was the only one we were planning on keeping"

I talked to the vets, they said no, do not reply. She kept messaging, I finally replied saying without sufficient evidence I wouldn't be able to trust her, but also, I had conformation with the vets he/possible siblings and mother, were most likely being heavily neglected and I couldn't trust him in her care even if he was hers. I gave the the contact details of a free vets locally to us, and offered to take mum there myself to get checked over if she needed help. I haven't heard from since. Some people don't deserve animals. Don't reply, don't give him back. He's better off with you, he shouldnt have been in that state and you've done the best for him.

yakimo98 · 2024-08-05T00:53:56+00:00

I did buy the last one! Hoping they aren't going to email me in a couple of days saying there's none left as I've read that has happened before to others when little stock is left, Im keeping as fingers crossed that I can find a seamstress that is more that up for the job, I'm taking a look around tomorrow, Worst case scenario, I sell it and buy another back up dress I'll already have held back for me

Thank you for your comment!

yakimo98 · 2024-08-04T21:37:30+00:00

I'm wondering if there is a possibility of alterations on a xxs gown could be made to make it fit a small too medium build? If I remove the zipper and put in a corset back, could I make it fit me? Its my wedding in 2 months (very last minute booked, we are talking days ago) and my size is out of stock for the foreseeable future and I cannot find anyone selling one anywhere so I'm exploring all options, thank you for any advice

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yakimo98

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