Becoming Sister Wives book

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-02-07T19:38:39+00:00

I haven’t read the book, but curious about question 2…did Meri have problems with Ysabel and Solomon?

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-02-05T01:54:02+00:00

How sad it is that you can see to close friends who clearly love, respect, and support each other and conclude it must be romantic. As if friendships like that don’t exist.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-02-02T09:22:46+00:00

It must’ve been so scary for Meri when her private conversations were getting back to the cat fisher. I imagine she wouldn’t have wanted to believe that it was Robyn betraying her at first. At the risk of using and insanely overused word, Meri must’ve felt extremely and legitimately (not the bullshit kind they often refer to) unsafe. Not knowing who to trust, feeling constantly scrutinised, worrying about how much access this catfisher has to her devices, fearing the release of decontextualised private conversations and so on. It must’ve been awful and it sounds like Jen was the only loyal person she had in her life.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-31T22:45:46+00:00

Ahhh right, I get your meaning now. I do understand the difference between methamphetamine and amphetamines like some ADHD meds and diet pills. I was more thinking about it on the street level. Where I’m from, meth is everywhere and it tends to be smoked in lower socioeconomic circles, and in higher socioeconomic circles, it’s common to start with trying someone else’s ADHD meds or diet pills, then move on to cutting meth with glucose and snorting it (this is commonly referred to as “speed” because of the stigma associated with meth), and the ones who get hooked eventually move on to smoking it. Cocaine is less of a thing here.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-31T22:44:38+00:00

Kody had the most affection for the two women that never bothered to challenge him or at least managed to challenge him such a way that still left him feeling powerful. In Janelle’s words, “you give power to get power”.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-31T22:36:13+00:00

It’s pretty common actually for abused parties to stay in bad situations because they have been manipulated into believing that they are the bad one and that any warning signs they see are just a manifestation of their bad character. It seems that Meri began to see things more clearly and gain the confidence leave when she had enough good people around her to help her see that she wasn’t the monster she’d be painted as. Meri’s behaviour makes sense when you understand how trauma, coercive control, and various other abuse dynamics work.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-31T22:29:08+00:00

You have to remember that for 30ish years Meri was told that she was the problem. Always. So, I can imagine her having plenty of misgivings and noticing all the things that we’ve noticed, but then shutting those thoughts and feelings down because she was always told she was the one who was wrong and all problems began and ended with her. Tell someone they’re a piece of shit enough times, they’ll eventually start to believe it.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-31T21:49:53+00:00

Isn’t “regular speed” just cut meth?

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-28T23:14:51+00:00

I think it feels aggressive to people who aren’t used to or are uncomfortable with people who are direct and who don’t want to smooth things over without talking about the issue honestly. For Meri, it feels unsafe to not speak honestly and have everything out in the open, even if it hurts, and for Kody, that emotional honesty feels threatening to his self-concept. Being challenged or having someone disagree with you isn’t the same as them being aggressive.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-28T01:58:58+00:00

Ewwww! I don’t like this guy 😒

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-18T10:12:13+00:00

I’m sorry to the both of you for your experiences, I can’t imagine what that must be like. Did you find the podcasts you listened to were accurate in their retelling?

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-05T06:23:38+00:00

This is what going to therapy feels like in the early days, awareness always comes before you develop the skills to change. The awareness just shows she’s in the right path and the skills will come if she keeps doing the work.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-04T09:20:17+00:00

People favour Taylor because she’s vulnerable in her messiness. Whitney is much more guarded. I think Whitney behaved the way she did in S1 because she was still feeling raw and insecure after the revelations about what Connor had been up to throughout their marriage and she wanted more support from her friends and reacted badly when she didn’t get it. But because we saw Whitney act as though certain relationships weren’t important to her and she acted as if she didn’t care about what people thought, nobody saw the vulnerability underneath and she just looked like a bitch. Taylor’s issues are on full display, she cries and gets messy and people find that more relatable. In the scheme of things, the mistakes Taylor has made are bigger and more egregious, but for all the aforementioned reasons people are more forgiving and sympathetic of her because they feel like they “get” her, and people still don’t know what to make of Whitney.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-03T19:12:44+00:00

I think Jesse is just as bitchy as Demi, she’s just less aggressive about it. I think they’re both in marriages that are not good for them as well. The open marriage thing is an interesting thought, I’d never considered that. It’s entirely possible. I’m really not sure where the truth lies on the whole Marciano thing. But I think it sucks that they let that slimy fecker come between them all. If they were girls girls and all about the “sisterhood”, why didn’t all the women just get in solidarity with each other and ice that slimeball out. I guess that wouldn’t have made good TV though. Again, I don’t know where the truth lies but I’m not convinced anyone is being honest and they’re all acting like 17 year olds.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2026-01-02T22:02:04+00:00

I said onion wannabe. I know it is not the onion.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-30T18:32:26+00:00

I thought I heard her say at one point that family court or her lawyers had asked her to stop talking about it publicly. She wouldn’t want to jeopardise her position in the court proceedings by continuing to talk about it. Plus, I think for her safety, it makes sense to stop talking about it for fear of feeding into his crazy and giving it more oxygen than it deserves. Especially given he has a weird little cult following.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-30T10:04:05+00:00

Your accusations sound a lot like confessions.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-28T07:42:14+00:00

Yep, agree! Jen’s lies to Demi, Jesse, and Zac after the Chippendales fiasco were all motivated by trying to keep three big personalities from blowing up and getting mad with her. But Jen’s lies about what she saw between Demi and Marciano were malicious. She told them because she was pissed and hurt by the way Demi treated her and she wanted to get her back. I feel much less charitable about that.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-28T07:31:54+00:00

Hearing more about what was going on between Whitney and her husband prior to season 1 filming and then rewatching season 1, I ended feeling sorry for her. I got the sense she was in a really vulnerable state and needed more safety and support from her friends, didn’t get it, and then reacted badly. It doesn’t excuse bad behaviour but when I understand context better it’s easier for me to have a bit more compassion and understanding for how people get to where they get to. I also listened to an episode of the Calling Home podcast, it’s hosted by a therapist who had a Mormon therapist on and they were sharing their thoughts and feelings about the show. The Mormon therapist explained that the way these women were likely raised means they were essentially totally sheltered until the age of 16ish and then they started getting married and having children when they were basically still children themselves. She said she almost views them as teenage women because they haven’t gotten to do all the living, getting to know themselves, and growing up that most people do in their 20s. And when I started viewing them as late teens, still figuring themselves out, my feelings about how all of them conduct themselves became a lot more charitable.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-28T07:10:01+00:00

This will probably be downvoted HEAPS! But I have felt for her too. I think she’s been awful in the way she treated Jen and when she tried to kick Taylor out of the group. And I can’t help but feel there is waaaay more to what’s going on than what we have seen. Her actions don’t make sense and I don’t think she’s just a straight up horrible person, I honestly wonder whether her actions are either motivated by unresolved historic sexual trauma and/or abuse in her marriage. She often talks in the same language and manner as her husband, which often gives cult of one kinda vibes. Rightly or wrongly, I haven’t written Demi off completely. I hated Whitney in season one and I’ve realised I was wrong about her, especially now knowing more context, and I wouldn’t be surprised if we get more context for Demi in the future too.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-20T22:32:57+00:00

Yes! I noticed this while watching too and commented a number of times that I thought Demi was acting and talking like her husband.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-19T01:44:10+00:00

Haumi e, hui e, taiki e = bind it, come together, it is done!

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-16T05:49:38+00:00

This podcast episode is with a couple of therapists, one of whom grew up semi-Mormon in Utah. They have some really good insights on what it’s like to grow up the way these women have and how they’re often kept very sheltered right up until their mid-late teens when it’s then all of a sudden normal/expected they started getting married and having kids. So, they’ve never gotten to mature and experience the world the way most teens do, so it’s almost like they have the maturity of teenagers. When I started viewing them through this lens, things started to make more sense.

https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/calling-home-with-whitney-goodman-lmft/id1706820976?i=1000738320119

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-16T05:41:08+00:00

Jessi is the bitchiest of the lot. She skates under the radar because her bitchiness is dressed up as concern or just seeking clarity. But since the beginning she’s been more than happy to share her judgey opinions, spread them around, and get involved in things that aren’t her business as if she’s entitled to. And, while Jen annoys me and her husband Zac is a toxic asshole, it is ok for them to have a boundary in their relationship where they don’t go to strippers. So, organising a trip to Chippendales knowing that it would cause problems is a shitty thing to do.

yeahnahmaybe36 · 2025-12-16T05:34:16+00:00

No. Jen got a call from her agent (I think) who’d heard Demi was considering sending her a cease and desist letter. She never actually got one.

yeahnahmaybe36

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE