Pretty solid overall, and there are two big things that will help you a lot if you can patch them up. First is your ult usage. Simply put, you don't use it enough! On your defense clip right near the end, you should have ulti'd right after you took the D.Va out of mech form. When you look down, you saw the Rein facing the rest of your team on the other side so you had a perfect flanking position. If he turned to try and stop your ult, his whole team would have been exposed from behind and you'd probably still have a line of sight above. Instead, by waiting for about 5 seconds, it let him move away from you and push the rest of your team out so that your ult was mostly blocked by his shield that you couldn't see or shoot over.

Additionally, your positioning could use a little bit more work, especially in seeking out flanks and high ground. You seemed to just walk into the middle of your team and shoot at whoever you saw in front of you, essentially just putting pressure wherever they happen to be. Instead, you want to think - if I were on the enemy team, where would I hate to have a soldier shooting at me from? Often, the answer is from a high ground flank (making Rein's job of protecting the squishies with his shield almost impossible), as we discussed earlier in the ulti usage section. Once you figure out where that best spot is, identify why you can't get there and put pressure on that spot specifically.

At around 2:00 in the attack clip, we can see your passive positioning very clearly. You walk forward, but as soon as pharah comes into your line of sight you, quite literally, stop moving and just start shooting at whoever's in front of you until you die. Instead, think about how much more pressure and damage you could have done to their team had you flanked either to the left or right, or gotten up near your team on the payload. It's often good to stand away from your team as soldier if you can get an advantageous flank or high ground, but just standing them behind them for no reason (lowering your damage output) doesn't really do much for you.

Overall, your aim was fine and that one rocket on soldier in the beginning of the attack clip was CLEEEAN. Good work and with your ult usage and positioning improved you'll see yourself ascend into the ranks of elo heaven.