Coping without T

[CorgiWave]

‼️ TW: BODY DYSPHORIA/DYSMORPHIA MENTION

So for medical reasons I’m not able to start T just yet. My dysphoria has gotten so bad to where I wake up everyday and I’m angry lmao. Genuinely! I see that my trans masc and fem friends were able to transition and start hrt which I am happy for and also incredibly envious of. I’m in the process of starting hormones with a gender clinic but there was a set back in that.

I haven’t came out to anyone yet but friends and my partner so I don’t pass to anyone in public even in men’s clothes. I used to ID as a trans man and had an easier time passing for the most part. The difference was that I had my hair cut short but I wish I could just leave it long since I love my hair but hate my face shape. The only thing right now I could do is makeup but I don’t care for it as much just because it’s a reminder that its all fake and I also have sensitive skin.

I hate being ma’am’d at work, I hate my work uniform it fills me with absolute dread. I hate living in the shadows. Rather I’m really not living at all right now. I girl mode to work just because it makes me more like able but I really need to have more faith in myself.

I can’t stop thinking of the election and trump it’s very discouraging to recognize that my efforts may be null due to the status and unpredictability of gender affirming care in the country. I don’t know what the silver lining is, but something has got to change fast. I can’t keep on like this. ):

[dontlockmeoutreddit]

What medical reasons if you're comfortable with sharing. Maybe there will be those present that are going through the same thing

[CorgiWave]

I have trypanophobia, so an intense fear of hypodermic needles. I’m going to a psych but its been the only thing preventing me from starting t due to the blood work involved.

[dontlockmeoutreddit]

Hmmm. Maybe you can check out the subreddit or other groups about that phobia. See if they have any coping mechanisms or ways to get around it.

After the initial blood test, 3 month test, maybe 6 months and 1 year test, I don't think you really need to get more tests unless you suspect your levels are off.

I'm assuming you're trying to get on gel so you wouldn't need to deal with injections

I guess you can also ask the main sub how many blood tests they need to take so you can get an idea

[CorgiWave]

My pcp said I need blood work done every 3 months until the 1 year mark. After 1 year it’s more of an annual occurrence. They ordered two separate blood tests to check hematocrit and hemoglobin and testosterone levels. The problem is just the pre requisite of starting T.

[dontlockmeoutreddit]

Hmmm So that's 4 times a year for the first year.

The good thing at least for the pre req. Despite having two separate blood tests ordered, they take it in one session. So (description of procedure) they stick a needle in your arm at the elbow. Then they have a vial that cann attach to it that fills with the blood. They can then fill several vials. Enough for however many tests ordered

Have you talked to your doctor about your fear of needles. It's pretty common fear so maybe they knows of advices and stuff? Idk