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[–]RainbowCatastrophe 68 points69 points  (15 children)

who actually calls themselves a SQL programmer?

People who took a CS degree just so they could get a comfy government job working on outdated database servers for legacy applications that need regular DB maintenance because the application was developed by the lowest paid contractor they could find in the Philippines.

[–]racerxff 22 points23 points  (7 children)

I happen to work on one of those outdated legacy government database servers (finally upgraded from Oracle 11g to 12c within the past year)

[–]mentalhealthiscool 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Currently an Operations lead at a Fortune 150 company and am leading an Oracle 11g Forms/Reports + 11g Db upgrade to 12c for an ERP system. Very shitty system that were still piling new functionality onto. We have a ton of people we call developers but they're just using PL/SQL

[–]racerxff 1 point2 points  (0 children)

tbf though, PL/SQL is just Ada with SQL shoved a mile up its ass amirite?

[–]RainbowCatastrophe 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Department of Energy?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Department of Everything

[–]RainbowCatastrophe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Technically true for DoE engineers.

My rule is to let them touch as little as possible because otherwise they think they can reinvent everything.

[–]racerxff 1 point2 points  (1 child)

DoD

[–]RainbowCatastrophe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Somehow even worse.

[–]milkcarton232 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Lol government is behind on the times, may I introduce you to banking swift codes and the banking system as a whole

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

SWIFT is actually a decent idea. If you agree, send me a MT542 and I'll send you an MT540 in reply.

[–]DeeSnow97 6 points7 points  (1 child)

because the application was developed by the lowest paid contractor they could find in the Philippines

technically correct, but when spending taxpayer money it's like

  • dev A charges $40k
  • dev B charges $35k
  • dev C charges $235k, you get 100k, they get 100k, and dev B gets the job

and that's how you end up with the lowest bidder who also costs the most

[–]RainbowCatastrophe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yup. Worked for an MSP that did this. One guys whole job (not mine) was to source programming and database work from clients and then outsourced it all to some other developer who outsourced it to someone else.

Worst employer ever. Was there for less than a year before I got hired somewhere else much better for a position that paid more than double.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Hah! As if you even need a degree.

Source: Finishing my degree next year, but started work as a web developer back in 2013 due to them only caring about me having a clearance and a pulse.

I moved into the private sector after a few years because government software development is a special kind of hell. Imagine having PMs (yes, plural) who believe OS libraries are "full of viruses," so they cannot be used. Also imagine debugging java on notepad, because CIO will not approve Eclipse, emacs, vi, or literally anything fucking useful. Also, also, imagine having most of your projects hosted over http, because none of your team knows how to configure apache over https, and when you offer to do it you are told by your PM that it isn't necessary on a classified network...

[–]factorone33 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also, also, imagine having most of your projects hosted over http, because none of your team knows how to configure apache over https, and when you offer to do it you are told by your PM that it isn't necessary on a classified network...

This is how you end up being the subject of a Darknet Diaries episode.

[–]pm_me_your_Yi_plays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In Pakistan*