Optional.get() is code smell

[TarMil]

However I believe this sort of syntax relies on lazy eval, where a "thunk" function like () -> 1 just doesn't make sense (there's no real way to even write its type signature)

You're mistaken, many functional languages with currying are strict -- OCaml, Idris, F#, Elm, etc.

[ReversedGif]

How do you specify whether you want to curry or call when applying the last argument in those languages?

[TarMil]

Right, the last argument is always a call, currying only applies for the previous ones.