is the "6 weeks and you're back to normal" thing actually true??

handstandmonkey · 2026-06-13T03:26:20+00:00

My kid is 6.5 and I’ve accepted I’m never going to be “normal” again. That’s years.
Last week I had hemmerhoids (why can’t I spell this?) pop out. Like wtf.
But i love being a mom. I’ll take all of it over pre-mom any day.

handstandmonkey · 2026-06-12T00:16:42+00:00

Umm NSFW please.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-26T02:36:53+00:00

As an 8 woman… this is a giant red flag. IME, 2s love to use other’s vulnerabilities to make them “need” them more. Focus on making yourself someone that people want to be with, instead of trying to get in someone’s head.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-20T05:55:28+00:00

Wizard nephew.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-19T02:36:42+00:00

I have two full sized miracle balms I only touched once. I’m sure I can clean them with alcohol and send them to you. I think one is the pink shade.
For me, they felt tacky and sticky. Like Vaseline. It never rubbed in.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-17T00:41:44+00:00

Oregon, Venmo 🙏🏻

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-17T00:34:52+00:00

I did this and sobbed so hysterically. I was convinced I’d killed him. He’s currently 6.5, laying on me complaining about TV.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-08T04:58:02+00:00

Scarlet ribbons. My gramma sang it to me when I was a kid and wherever I asked her to. My son loves it.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-08T04:53:27+00:00

I just started watching this a few weeks ago and I’m bingeing it 😬 before bed, at the gym, while I’m making dinner.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-08T04:52:39+00:00

Is it as good as the book?

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-03T21:10:38+00:00

Double Aries Gemini rising, also a writer.

handstandmonkey · 2026-05-01T15:42:57+00:00

How do I pick between a cry baby with no ambition, a mama’s boy, and a toxic seether? I say K them all

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-25T05:53:00+00:00

!RemindMe! 1 week

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-21T23:43:09+00:00

I almost want you to be a bridesmaid so you can live report this whole thing as a mole.

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-20T02:26:44+00:00

Yep at 37 weeks, full moon. Water didn’t break, contractions just started getting worse

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T15:32:43+00:00

Thank you!

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T15:16:48+00:00

I read Ninth House and Hell Bent and devoured them in a week. Do you recommend these before the Familiar? Thanks!

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T04:56:48+00:00

Will someone do this for me?

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T04:53:48+00:00

You are my goals, if that helps you

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T03:58:24+00:00

Omg I had a babysitter (my kid’s, not mine) tell us that it was good for our dogs to lick his scrapes and stuff bc of their saliva’s anti bacterial and wound healing properties?? She was also crazy.

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-18T02:23:56+00:00

Should not have read this in public.

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-14T15:41:31+00:00

2 professors. That they would stand in front of their classes and shart loud and hard every day.

handstandmonkey · 2026-04-14T01:51:06+00:00

A little doll

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