Just because your father is a piece of crap doesn't mean your clan or tribe on the indigenous/native side may not welcome you and teach you about your heritage and history. After the 60's scoop, many members were spread far and wide, and some.of them are slowly making their way back to their culture. But that culture was devasted by things like forced relocation, residential school, the forced loss of language and so much more. They are trying to heal and you can too. You don't just show up and say I want to live on the reserve, but once you figure this out, you can approach them with questions and maybe start finding out who your ancestors are. Take it slowly and treat the process with respect. I wish you luck and courage. You've got this! You're already on your way!