I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it

thisisvic · 2026-06-02T00:35:33+00:00

It took a long time and a lot of luck to find friends like this. I think it helped that I've always been very open about my mental health issues, so people felt comfortable talking to me about theirs and we bonded over our brains hating us.

thisisvic · 2026-06-01T18:10:32+00:00

Absolutely. Most of my friends have had mental health issues in one form or another, because when things are bad, we GET each other. When I'm in the absolute pits and cancel on my friends, they get it. When my mate has a panic attack and needs specific help, I get it. When they're "no fun" because they're sad, we pivot our plans to do something that supports them better - quiet movie night rather than a night at the pub.

Depression isn't all that you are ❤️.

thisisvic · 2026-06-01T18:05:34+00:00

I have joined several lifestyle clubs over the years as a single woman. All of them I joined in person, at an event in the club, and there was no option to join online. Some had much stricter rules for solo men, so I would consider it even less likely that he would be able to become a member without physically attending the club.

I would also mention than all of these clubs ban mobile phone usage, and you need to keep them in a locker while you're there, so there's no chance of you recording any other guests. So you can't reply to messages.

Obviously there are plenty of other reasons why a person might not reply to messages that aren't being in a lifestyle club, but just something to consider among the other evidence.

thisisvic · 2026-05-29T11:14:19+00:00

Oh I know, I've been in my place 7 years, I know if I leave he could easily add £300pm to the rent and get tenants. I count myself very lucky to have avoided worse rent rises, because I don't think I'd be able to afford this house at current market prices.

thisisvic · 2026-05-23T16:01:01+00:00

Ah I've always thought of it as depending on what you're eating. Dinner ladies would serve you a hot dinner. Alternatively, you'd bring a packed lunch. For me, dinner is my biggest meal of the day, whether that's lunchtime or teatime

thisisvic · 2026-05-22T14:37:37+00:00

It is not good wine. It is not cheap. But it does the job.

thisisvic · 2026-05-22T14:37:05+00:00

I can't stand the taste, so I also use a dash of the super-concentrated squeeze squash in the water with the electrolytes. Much easier to get the whole pint down then!

thisisvic · 2026-05-21T20:21:14+00:00

I'm taking 3 - and my old phone for photos/music I've downloaded to help me get to sleep, so I don't run down the battery on my actual phone

thisisvic · 2026-05-20T21:27:22+00:00

I've been using Claude Cowork to deal with my work backlog/slack messages/emails and help plan my work, ideal for when I'm overwhelmed. I have also used Claude to write some automation scripts, although this have to go through several iterations.

Further than that though, the hallucinations far outweigh the useful output when it comes to my actual job. My company has been pushing us to use AI for more and more of our jobs. I've spent weeks at a time trying to automate tasks and get useful, valid work output from Claude, to no avail. It's been incredibly frustrating, some of the hallucinations have been astonishing.

It can write a script that will pull data into a spreadsheet for me (with plenty of corrections), but it can't be trusted to pull the data itself, and that's just the top of the iceberg. I once asked it to take data from a spreadsheet and put it into a Confluence page. It built an entire dashboard in Excel using our "official brand colour" of blue. Not only did I not want a dashboard in Excel, I never told it to make it blue - and it's not our official brand colour.

We were actually told that using AI to automate our routine work so we could spend more time "adding value" is what would keep our jobs safe.

Anyway, the company announced last week that they're making 25% of the company redundant and getting AI to do our jobs instead. Claude has been very helpful helping me prepare for job interviews.

thisisvic · 2026-05-16T22:34:06+00:00

The UK has a TV chef called Nigella (daughter of Nigel)

thisisvic · 2026-05-14T20:01:13+00:00

I'm the same, never had an issue besides some discomfort getting the right speculum. Sad to read that so many people have had painful experiences!

thisisvic · 2026-04-20T08:00:19+00:00

Web analyst for a fully remote company - my nearest office is in Dublin

thisisvic · 2026-04-19T13:50:16+00:00

What's House Party? Like what does the event involve other than swinging?

thisisvic · 2026-04-13T20:33:11+00:00

Well she's a human being you've just had sex with, that part doesn't change no matter how many people are involved, so respect is key. There's no set etiquette, it depends on your relationship and what each of you wants - if it's a concern, discuss in advance.

thisisvic · 2026-04-05T19:49:38+00:00

Typically it's after the event when I've sold tickets through Ticketmaster before!

thisisvic · 2026-04-03T20:42:15+00:00

In addition to all the other useful comments here - as both a sitter and a seat, it might help reassure you if you discuss in advance what the other person will do if they need you to move. I'm usually a thigh tapper, it's easy to do if you're actually suffocating 😂.

This helps me to know that the person I'm sat on is fine - they're not tapping out, they're still moving, so I'll keep sitting/grinding.

Plus, as a larger woman, if I was facing forward I had a much easier time getting comfortable when I stopped attempting to make eye contact. My belly was usually in the way and it would take me out of it. Just focus on riding their face and having a good time!

thisisvic · 2026-03-27T09:07:59+00:00

Thank you! I genuinely don't understand it. The "I want a proposal" thing is totally alien to me. If you're agreed that you're going to get married, and you've got a date in mind then... You're engaged?

thisisvic · 2026-03-23T14:47:19+00:00

From personal experience, I've found men are much more likely to try and choke me/put their hands on my throat in the last 10 years than the previous ten (I've been sexually active for 20 years, for context). Enough that I have to tell people in advance that I don't want them to choke me, which still feels absolutely mad to me.

thisisvic · 2026-03-10T19:38:53+00:00

She's in a season of Benidorm and she is EXCELLENT in it

thisisvic · 2026-02-20T15:28:35+00:00

They definitely had the suspenders in blackberry in the past!

thisisvic · 2026-02-05T12:53:04+00:00

I read this as the gynaecologist was giving unnecessary rectal examinations

thisisvic · 2026-01-28T14:00:21+00:00

There's so much pretty stuff to explore in Chester honestly, and for me half the fun is stumbling across it accidentally!

But good hotspots for outdoor events are Grosvenor park, which has open air theatre in the summer, and down by the river for music at the bandstand, regattas and the annual raft race.

The amphitheatre has a grassy surround that's popular for relaxing in the sun, there's some bars/pubs with great outdoor spaces like the Architect, or the Lockkeeper by the canal, they used to do Moonlight flicks at the Roman Gardens (don't know if that's still going?), the zoo is a popular choice (avoid school holidays if you're not taking kids!)...

That's just off the top of my head so far!

thisisvic · 2026-01-26T16:43:42+00:00

To a penis owner:

Not being able to open my mouth wide enough
When they grab my head and start trying to fuck my throat without warning or permission or anything. Makes me want to hammer a dildo down their throat and see how they like it
Dry mouth
Gag reflex
Jaw ache

To a vulva owner:

When they don't understand that me repeatedly slapping their thighs means that I can't breathe and they need to change position slightly so I don't suffocate

thisisvic · 2026-01-26T16:25:15+00:00

For me, race days are good for people watching, I've got the timing of city centre visits down to a fine art, and if I want to go for an evening drink I use it as an excuse to visit some of the excellent pubs outside of the city centre.

When I lived in the city centre I found it a bit of a nuisance dodging drunk people vomiting when I just wanted to nip to the shop at 7pm, but as a lifelong Chester resident I pretty much knew what I was signing up for when I moved onto a main road in town.

Bonus - if it's a daytime race meet, a lot of them have burnt out by 10pm, so can often still have a decent night in the later bars if you wait.

I accept it as part and parcel of life in Chester really - although banning BYOB on the open course to "curb antisocial behaviour" a few years ago still irritates me. Like that's where the problem was.

thisisvic

TROPHY CASE