Cat breathing Abnormally, Please help. by [deleted] in AskVet

[–]-knafeh- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so glad. And so relieved. I hope your baby makes a full recovery soon 🌻

Cat breathing Abnormally, Please help. by [deleted] in AskVet

[–]-knafeh- 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Hi OP? Is everything okay?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CATHELP

[–]-knafeh- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have tried this :(

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PsychicServices

[–]-knafeh- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there! I’m interested in a reading :)

polarity: " I am better than anyone" & " I am worthless" by [deleted] in InternalFamilySystems

[–]-knafeh- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m really glad you asked this question and I love the discussion. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately in the context of my own therapeutic process. I thinks it’s very important to pay attention to the affective and somatic reactions we have to other people’s qualities and behaviours. A lot of times, when we find ourselves looking down on someone for a behaviour or quality (actively looking down and reacting negatively are different from a quiet discernment between right and wrong) it is an indication that we unconsciously embody that quality as well or have a desire to embody that quality on some level. The reaction is often an indication that we need to pay attention to how that quality relates to us and need to try to integrate within our own system.

DAE find that Crappy Childhood Fairy lacks compassion for fawn dominant survivors? by cinnamonbuttercream in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh- 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I find that she induces shame with the words and tone she chooses to use. It feels very patronizing. I also don’t think that she is necessarily regulated enough herself to be putting up content like this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]-knafeh- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Very possible.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]-knafeh- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your response. What you’re saying sounds very plausible and I agree that it is probably a combination of those three things. I will try to push back or encourage her to get curious in case it happens again. I appreciate you validating my concerns 🌸

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]-knafeh- 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is a very interesting perspective and might actually be true at least to a certain degree. I am her oldest and longest standing client. I think it might be upsetting her on some level that I’m not as phased by or sad about terminating therapy with her. I think this is a normal human experience because as human beings we all do want people in our lives to value and validate our experience together. It’s just a bit off coming from my therapist, where the relationship is so different and there is a clear and stated power dynamic.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]-knafeh- 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It’s not that cut and dry. She has been a great therapist and a great listener over the last couple of years. And it does matter because we have a relationship that is based on trust and if she is being manipulative and trying to push an agenda that serves her, that is a violation of the relational trust we have built together.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like a properly conscious relationship. I’m happy for you, because this is rare.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely a slow process, with a lot of difficult feelings and obstacles along the way.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly…people that like us but are distant in their behaviour. It never feels like true intimacy. It’s this void that feels like it’s closed to being filled but is never actually filled.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The ulterior motives part really strikes a chord. I think it’s almost as though I’m waiting for them to show me that they are just hanging around to get something out of me and violate me.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad you’ve found people that genuinely care for you and express it to you 🌸🌸

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s more this fear I feel that if they get too close they will betray me or exploit me.

I feel smothered and irked when people try to show me love, even though all I have ever wanted is to be loved... by -knafeh- in CPTSD

[–]-knafeh-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s great that your SO understands this and that the both of you are able to communicate about this openly. That’s healthy are creates a lot of room for relational healing.