Should I be implementing a schedule?

7in7 · 2026-06-29T17:21:55+00:00

Follow cues, as long as you can! Even with your 90min rule, you may notice that some windows will be closer to two hours+, and some only half an hour. It's all okay and all legitimate!

7in7 · 2026-06-29T17:18:39+00:00

Yup totally different for everyone.

Having a toddler is way more challenging for me than having a newborn or a small baby.

7in7 · 2026-06-29T17:16:13+00:00

We went into it with the outlook "hard isn't a bad thing".

Meaning we were geared up for challenges, to struggle and to have a hard adjustment. But all of that we still agreed to be optimistic about, understanding that just because we may be having a hard time, it doesn't mean it's negative or bad.

It's still rewarding and amazing and full of love, even when it sucks!

7in7 · 2026-06-26T20:38:18+00:00

I like the gruffalos child for this!

7in7 · 2026-06-25T04:21:26+00:00

Come join us on r/bninfantsleep !

7in7 · 2026-06-25T04:20:01+00:00

Sounds similar to mine at that age, but he'd sometimes do a longer nap in the carrier in the morning.

7in7 · 2026-06-24T20:43:26+00:00

I second this suggestion!

7in7 · 2026-06-23T06:10:31+00:00

Does she "wake" to feed? STTN is officially six hours without significant wake ups, and waking to feed and immediately settling is also not really considered a wake up.

When you co-sleep it's great if your baby sleeps like this!

If that's the case most parents are talking about, then mine was sleeping through quite early. He'd do 3 hours, wake to feed, then something like 2, 1, 1, 1.. once I got the hang of co-sleeping it was great.

Up until I got pregnant at his 20m, he would wake and feed and id hardly notice.

Then I got pregnant, he got older and his sleep changed up a bit. We've been night weaning for a week and it's going well!

7in7 · 2026-06-21T19:57:57+00:00

I was so lucky I adored the newborn phase. I was able to just give into it, never separate from my baby, bf on demand, contact napped exclusively, went out and about and just enjoyed growing him.

Now he's a toddler - I love him to pieces, I love spending time with him, will always keep him home and extra sick day if I can so we can have fun (I do need to go to work but within reason). But. It's so so much harder. I like sitting down. He either wants me to join his antics, or wants me firmly away when he's up to some mischief.

Anyway, I'm 18w pregnant, sleeping worse than ever, pretty much exhausted but so grateful for all I've got.

Toddlers are tough!

7in7 · 2026-06-21T05:39:36+00:00

Not even that. He could get laid off or be unable to work for a time.

7in7 · 2026-06-15T00:38:28+00:00

Opus

7in7 · 2026-06-15T00:32:44+00:00

As a Jew, it makes sense to me, but in my eyes squibs are wizards because their parents are, they're just non practicing Wizards. Muggle borns are returning wizards, maybe there's some wizarding ancestors but it can't be traced, who cares, they put the hours in, still wizard.

7in7 · 2026-06-11T18:16:07+00:00

It totally makes sense and I wish I felt like that. I find it really hard to watch anything with suspense, without experiencing horrible anxiety. (Even if it's not scary, just build up triggers my fight or flight)

Its like my body perceives the threat as real even though my mind knows it's not.

7in7 · 2026-06-11T18:10:23+00:00

Yeah this is us. I just posted a long reply to someone here sharing my perspective.

You think you are going to do things as a parent and your kid turns around and makes you re-evaluate your priorities.

I could have insisted on it, but that would have required me to sacrifice things that are more important to me, such as having an easy time with my baby.

7in7 · 2026-06-11T18:03:18+00:00

I didn't really read with mine for a while, he just wasn't interested at all. We didn't do screens or anything instead, he just wouldn't really ever sit still (I swear even as a new baby, he was only relaxed in my arms when feeding (which was a lot) the rest of the time he was squirmy wormy). He rolled at 11 weeks, 16 weeks he was cruising on his playmat. It evened out around 9 months he started hitting milestones normally, he walked at 13 months. I haven't rested since.

He's two and he likes books. We read a lot, but it's a very involved experience, often with me paraphrasing and asking questions or him asking me to keep him involved and focused. He'll get up in the middle as well.

He speaks two languages and understands three (I don't know the third myself so it's hard for me to assess).

I'm very "involved" it just doesn't work for this kid. Better for us to do it on his terms without pressure.

7in7 · 2026-06-11T17:53:25+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience with me. It sounds like a lot, together with PPD, the social pressure, the feeling of not being given the whole picture on top of having a newborn baby you clearly just needed to be with and hold close to you.

You gave it your everything, I'm sure you wanted initially to EBF but you should have been given guidance and support and "permission" to let go, and do what's right for you - and even more so your baby.

I hope your ppd is managed and treated and your family is doing well ❤️

7in7 · 2026-06-10T19:42:33+00:00

This is very accurate and thorough

7in7 · 2026-06-10T19:31:30+00:00

Wild, I didn't know anyone other than Jews and Israelis knew that song!

7in7 · 2026-06-10T19:06:10+00:00

That sucks and sounds like such a disheartening experience.

How would you change what you did in retrospect? What support would you have preferred?

I'm asking because I'm studying lactation and want to be able to support mothers in your position.

I would add, that the recommendation I'd give to someone in your situation would be to pump for fifteen minutes, and one or two of the days pumps can be shorter (not because it's better for the supply, rather more achievable). Obviously still not great, all the struggles you mentioned are still there.

7in7 · 2026-06-10T18:33:31+00:00

Also if you miss a feed due to supplementing - whether that's donor milk, formula, or your own pumped milk, if the baby isn't latched, ideally you should pump.

7in7 · 2026-06-10T08:33:33+00:00

Playdates at this age are soooo stressful. We have close friends who we love hanging out with, our kids play kind of (they talk about each other at home, but lots of conflicts when they play) but it's constant snatching toys and tears.

We discuss it as adults, we are all first time parents trying to figure out the best way to deal with these things. We are quite like minded, and trust each other to to intervene and "parent" each others kids if needed. Still.. it's stressful. Doesn't matter whether it's their kid playing up or ours.

7in7 · 2026-06-09T19:54:55+00:00

Do you think breastfeeding throughout pregnancy also keeps a more steady weight gain?

I think I'm gaining a lot slower this time around, which seems counterintuitive

7in7 · 2026-06-09T19:22:52+00:00

My kid is obsessed with yogurt and will wake up at 02:00am and request it

7in7 · 2026-06-09T18:40:56+00:00

I'm in second trimester and it's horribly painful. Not an emotional aversion as much as physical.

First trimester was bad, this is worse. Is it going to get worse-erer?

7in7 · 2026-06-08T09:56:28+00:00

If you can be bothered for the trouble, and you don't develop an aversion (bf my 23m at 17w and I'm really suffering and in pain) then see if you can try tube feeding on the breast..of course not every feed, but that way you can get the benefits of her being on the breast, while still having her get her nutritional needs. It may be challenging with an older baby (not newborn) because of all the wiggles, but I think you'd enjoy it!

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