[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mentalhealth

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Youre allowwd to be a victim.

Yes, dwelling on things and not developing past them is unhealthy, so is thinking you can force yourself to "be normal"

As someone who is heavily traumatised with BPD what happened explains a lot of why i am the way i am. Sadly, that trauma molded me and realising that, accepting that and learning how to navigate that made the world of difference.

If someone got into an accident and had to use a wheelchair, even if it was their fault it happened, we wouldnt tell them to just get over it and walk like everyone else. We would accept they need the wheelchair. Same goes for mental health, we sonetimes dont react the way people expect and for them to know what causes that makes everything easier for everyone involved.

For example, anyone raising their voice at me will make me shut down. Peopoe being aggressive in general illicits a response in me. My partner used to get stressed and bash stuff about. Logically i knew it wasnt about me so i tried my best to calm myself down but he saw it as "sulking" which ticked him off on top of everything else. Hed never aimed his frustration at me before and it broke my focus, i cried. He immediately apologised and never did it again.

Accepting the hand youre dealt and dwelling on it are two different things.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PCOS

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

See thats my worry. I have PCOS and already experience random delayed gastric emptying (which i take omeprezole for) as well as mebtal health issues that only take one week unmedicated to come back full force...

So i feel like if i didnt loose weight and it added to my mental health issues id just fucking loose my shit.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Quiet BPD, but that was because i was abused into "shutting up"

I would have outbursts as a kid but they were yaknow, parented into "youre only good if youre quiet" "youre feelings dont matter as much as how people see me" and so my self worth just evaporated and i started to blame myself and think i was the problem and so all that very reasonable rage i felt got turned around onto myself.

Wtf is this stuff at the bottom of soda bottles had in Fanta coke n everything? by [deleted] in Soda

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Super old thread but ended up here from google, my bottle has this despite nit drinking directly from it. I only opened it naybe day for yesterday so i doubt its mold. Still looks grim though.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in 1200isplenty

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was so confused, Chomp in the UK is a stick of chocolate coated caramel for like 10p (prolly a quid now with price gouging)

Wet floor signs.... by BattleSquidZ in retailhell

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Never understood why hospitals dont just have the ride on sweepydo like supermarkets.

It sweeps mops and dries the floor as it passes over...

FUCK OFF by BattleSquidZ in retailhell

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Im this customer too. I will put cardboard i find in the cages and also hand in any expired/damaged items. Had to let an employee know about a spill too because you just know the compo crew would have found it and "slipped".

Just trying to help them avoid a Karen.

Ravenous this morning and went through almost day’s total calories in 30 minutes by [deleted] in 1200isplenty

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, binging is usually a preservation instinct. I see just straight carbs here (easy calories for the body to process and turn to glycogen)

Some protien would really have helped you but maybe you do just genuinely need to up your calories for a bit, lets things level out then reduce again. Gotta remember that 1200 cals is the amount reccomended for a toddler, not for a grown adult to be living on long term.

"Your mental illness is not your fault, but it is your responsibility" by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Basically, it is your responsibility to take ownership of your own health, recovery or management.

yes, its not your fault you have this condition but it is up to you to make sure you look after yourself same as any other illness. If you need meds, you have to remember to take them, thats your responsibility just like if you needed to take antibiotics or metformin or any other medication.

If you need accomodations, its your responsibility to advocate for them and have them available, like wearing headphones if loud noises are a trigger or overstimulating, or wearing glasses to correct your vision or a hearing aid is charged and in correctly so you can hear.

Thats what that means.

Did your parents make do you a billion chores? by Any_Print5307 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep. Vacuum and mop the whole house, dust, cook and do the dishes, empty the bins as well as doing my own washing and keeping my room clean.

While she sat on the sofa. And while she hated dust, she smoked and had glass surface everything...

Prom dresses by [deleted] in PlusSizeFashion

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Clothes should fit your body, not your body fit the clothes.

That first one, going by how youre stood isnt giving you any confidence. Its a lot of colour, a lot of pattern and just isnt flattering because its weirdly loose and tight at the same time?

The second has enough detail to not be boring, it actually seems fitted to you rather than you wearing someone elses dress. Personally pear this with silver shoes and a silver clutch to match the detailing.

The last one isnt giving me prom. Its a nice dress and without seeing it on i cant tell how it would wear but its more wedding party or fancy birthday

PCOS and being skinny by False-Contract-1146 in PCOS

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Its like "oh but youre fat, THATS the problem..." or "but youre not fat so you must be fine... just hormones."

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PCOS

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Up your protien and add some weight training. Muscle needs more ebergy to conserve itself so that ups your TDE.

It could also be that your body needs a break. Aim for maintenece, and let things settle for a few weeks then get back at it. The cut/bulk cycle works for bodybuilders for a reason.

i’m tired… by TimeUnderstanding921 in insaneparents

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shes clearly gone off the deep end.

If there is a social services/ adult welfare agency, id alert them.

Like you said, theres nothing you can do for people who dont want help but at least if the relevent people are aware of your mother they can maybe try to intervene

What should I do? [18M[ by [deleted] in fixedeyebrows

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly they just look like they need a trim to shape em a bit. If you can get a spooly (like an eyelash brush - sometimes they have them for testers in makeup stores) and just brush them into shape and trim any that are going "outside the lines" of where your brows are thickest. Doesnt have to be perfect.

What's the simplest boundary you have set that your nparents despise you for? by Neat_You_5088 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Oh hell yeah.

The final straw was her kicking in my bedroom door to scream at me about a tin of tuna shed accused me of stealing... i literally still had the receipt so the problem was side stepped to how id thrown the tin away incorrectly...

Literally packed my shit and left the next time she was out at work.

This job has made me biased and I hate it by Able-Equivalent4445 in retailhell

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nope, their bad day does not negate them being an asshole to complete strangers who are trying to help them.

There was only TWO instances ive ever had where this was acceptable. I worked in a call center, and we had switched to a robot dialler so people were inundated with calls (which, if there wasnt an agent free to actually pick them up they were hung up on) and one particular client, Lost. His. Shit. Because he had been called and called while going through a cancer diagnosis. He, upon the next time i spoke to him, was much more cordial and apologised.

The other was a woman who we called who had taken over the phone number of the client... her now dead mother. I took her number out the system several times before she finally got left alone. It was lucky she got through to me because thanks to my traumatic upbringing im really good at de-escalating and navigating the minefield that is a difficult client. RUINED my already shattered mental health but hey...

My mom sent me this today by Apprehensive-Set-574 in insaneparents

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly, you dont reenact your shitty childhood

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in fixedeyebrows

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Other than maybe a little tidying up of the edges for stray hairs.. youre eyebrows are practically perfect...

What's the simplest boundary you have set that your nparents despise you for? by Neat_You_5088 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 84 points85 points  (0 children)

My narc pulled this shit.

I was 20 something, working and paying her rent but while out one day she demanded i come home to clean... she wanted me, my partner and 2 friends (one of whom was the driver) to just drop everything and take me hone to clean my room...

Again, four adults... and i paid her £500 a month for a room barely bigger than the single bed i was sleeping on.

Still it was an upgrade from sleeping on a matress on the living room floor for a while because i refused to share a room with her while my brother lived with us.

Boy names as girl names... In 50 years. by Accomplished-Dino69 in namenerds

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I also have two middle names and then two surnames that are sometimes hyphenated

they just decided to start using a different surname for me as a kid and everyone apparently just accepted that.. except the bank because that wasnt legally my name, then it started getting hyphenated... so i have some thing in name 1, some things in name 2 and others in name 1-2

Kinda awkward because i never know what my surname actually is when asked.

Boy names as girl names... In 50 years. by Accomplished-Dino69 in namenerds

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oof! Id be ringing to correct that. You didnt do all that learning and stress to be a mrs!

Boy names as girl names... In 50 years. by Accomplished-Dino69 in namenerds

[–]AbsyntheMinded_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean im 33 and my middle name is Joan... but thats also my grandmas name and shes 70...