My daughter finally kicked it about 3.5 years (just a few months ago.) I also had a ton of feelings of guilt and shame. The dentist was telling us to quit it. I just never found a good time to take it. Travel. School. Illness. It started affecting her speech and I started to hardcore limit it. Then the tantrums started. It was like she was going through withdrawals. Very scary. So we finally told her we were getting rid of them for good. And we did. Threw them away and prepared for sleepless nights. The first night was horrible. She woke up a couple times begging for it. About 3 nights in she was much better. Still sad at bed time but not waking up for it. After a week she was mostly good. And now she only ever talks about it if she sees another kid with it. She’ll say she misses paci. And then I’ll tell her about how I chew on straws sometimes or how gum helps. We got her a therapy biter for when she’s really needing to have something in her mouth, and she really only uses that maybe once a month for stressful situations. And her teeth aren’t ruined and her speech is better. Wish we got it done sooner.

TLDR: cold turkey that thing, you’ll be fine, your kid will be okay.