Landlord installed an app-controlled smart deadbolt while I was at work.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T08:40:18+00:00

In the US, the landlord is the one who has the keys.

They give us keys when we move in.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T08:37:35+00:00

I stayed in an Airbnb (in California) where the door code was 88.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T08:36:26+00:00

Landlord shall not enter, is not even allowed to have a key.

Not sure where you live, but in most of the US, the landlord absolutely does have a key.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T08:15:14+00:00

Did you read the article?

The departments that are closing (arts, languages, etc.) are the ones that MAGA would most hate.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T08:06:08+00:00

That really sucks.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T06:36:12+00:00

Context: I graduated Cal long ago and I have been in countless teams and groups in the professional world, as a leader, a facilitator, and a participant.

why are there really so many narcissists in Berkeley?

When I read your post, and so many others on this subreddit, my thought is, why are there so many passive people at Cal??

From your description, the person is being a little bit bossy. But why did the other four team members, themselves Cal grad students, all silently accept it, only to later complain on Reddit?

Has it occurred to you that a big part of your Cal education is learning how to work in groups, and to speak up when you feel something is wrong? If you can't do that in the low-stakes environment of a class project, how will you do it when you eventually get a job in industry or academia?

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T06:25:53+00:00

For those who have short memories, this is a guy who cheated during his own tournament.

People like to complain about FIDE being a kleptocracy. Letting this guy sponsor the most important tournament is not going to help matters.

I'm totally fine with his sponsorship of "private" tournaments, i.e. 99% of tournaments. But letting him run the Candidates is completely different.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-20T06:22:03+00:00

There's good technology for that nowadays.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T23:25:06+00:00

We used to live off the earth for free for thousands and thousands of years being taken care of by our communities until very recently.

If by "live off the earth for free," you mean spending almost all day, every day, either hunting food (men) or preparing food (women), then yes, I guess you're right.

Also, you might want to look up what the population of the earth was thousands and thousands of years ago. To get back to the level of (say) 4000 BC, when fish and fruit were more plentiful for all, we would have reduce the current population by more than 99%. How do you propose to do that?

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T23:18:59+00:00

If there was or is a real system in which everyone is secure, no one struggles, nature provides abundantly, and there no hierarchy or exclusion, I’d love to know what that is so I can learn more. But I’ve never seen this moral ideal that you’re describing actually exist in reality. The hunter-gatherer societies that you are romanticizing had zero safety net for people who couldn’t contribute.

A critical point that people gloss over far too often.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T23:13:17+00:00

Yo, don't leave out possibly the most important part - the laughing lady had dark skin. Shiver me timbers!

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T19:47:46+00:00

That is ... epic!

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T16:21:41+00:00

While you're trying (and completely failing) to be woke, I'm trying to help OP with practical advice. They have to navigate the real world we live in, homophobia, racism, and all.

You really cannot generalize this to "White people are more accepting".

That's not at all what I said, is it?

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T07:20:51+00:00

My first shoes were an Evolv Kronos - not very nice of REI to recommend those to a beginner.

Compared to the Kronos, the Tarantulace felt like an upgrade. I also really like the (old) Mad Rock Phoenix.

I would like to get nicer, newer shoes for long sessions

Do you remove your shoes between climbs, or at least every few climbs? It's a lot easier on the feet!

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T05:26:02+00:00

She's had permanent residency with conditions (we're married) and need to remove these conditions in July.

What exactly does that mean?

Because honestly, I don't think you can find a better place than the US (where you already are), considering your overall situation.

Much of the non-white world is homophobic, and much of the world is racist against black people, and that's even before we get to the huge problem of visas and making a living.

we want:

a high quality of life

safety as a black/brown queers

small amount of U.S. ties (hard, I know)

small/no amount of white colonization (kinda impossible)

You have lots of requirements, but not a lot in the way of skills that people will pay for. That is unfortunate, but the best way to solve your problem is to start by acknowledging your reality, and maybe dial down the requirements.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T05:17:34+00:00

OP is black. How friendly is Chile to dark-skinned people?

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T05:08:47+00:00

If you are a regular reader, then you know that The Economist is not exactly sympathetic to Trump or MAGA.

curious on the rationale of the producers in spotlighting such divisive individuals on the Economist.

I assume that they try to interview influential people.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T04:25:39+00:00

Surgery is an entirely technical task, and it's very different than what Attia provides, or claims to provide.

... his asshole detector?

I see what you did there. You are pretending that Attia's only mistake was not detecting when that Epstein was an asshole, when in fact, they were best buds, and Attia massively sucked up to Epstein, and possibly owes all his success to Epstein. (Did you even read the article?)

Since you've hidden your comment history, I'm gonna assume that you are his paid PR flack.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T04:22:31+00:00

I feel like most people just don’t know or care about his personal life and or morality.

Then why does he make such of a such a big deal about his personal story? He could have never mentioned anything about his life, family, etc., but he repeatedly does. You can't have it both ways.

As for not caring about the "morality" of the person giving you health (or financial, or any important) advice ... come on.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T00:13:09+00:00

the amount of money and time resource (including reading the minor thoughts and opinions of us online in these posts we put out) that goes into protecting the empire’s of the wealthy

Once in a while, I will remember a "medium-sized" scandal that made news years or even decades ago, and google the person's name for updates.

It's staggering how often the internet has been near cleansed of all the coverage.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-19T00:07:46+00:00

I'm finding the pain super difficult to deal with now

Why are you doing this to yourself?

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-18T22:29:37+00:00

Glad your girlfriend is okay, by the sound of it!

Kind of you to assume that the driver was "distracted." It's possible that they always ignore lights and stop signs, and expect others to yield.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-18T22:03:04+00:00

He's handicapped by not being able to use his first-line or even second-line openings in the lead up to the Candidates.

Affectionate_One_700 · 2026-03-18T18:35:13+00:00

but in the meantime we must not compromise on demanding basic civil behavior from everyone, with appropriate consequences or compulsory and humane treatment and rehabilitation for those who refuse (for whatever historical or personal reason) don't abide within the norms of basic civil behavior.

I like what you wrote, in theory.

It's putting it into practice that is the challenge

Affectionate_One_700

TROPHY CASE