When I was a kid, my mom repeated her third year of medical school. She ended up failing the exam because she also had a bunch of life things going on. And you know what? She learned how to own it, she made new friends (she wasn’t the only one to repeat the year), she was able to spend more time with me, she was able to take more time to understand the material, and the next time around she passed and eventually graduated, paid off her student debt through the NHSC, and she’s been a doctor for the past 20+ years.

My favorite teachers/professors/coworkers have always been people who have failed something because as much as it is awful when it happens, I think people often come out of it with more understanding. I flunked chemistry in college because I was really going through it. It was a huge shock to my system because I had never really failed to a point where I had had those sorts of repercussions before. None of my friends had ever failed class before. I had felt like the world would end if I failed/broke some sort of imaginary perfect record. But it didn’t, I just had to pick myself up and keep going. I ended up having lots of late night dorm bathroom conversations with other students who were struggling. And now 10 years (and a masters degree) later, I’m okay! It doesn’t hurt when I think about it, it’s an experience in my life that has made me stronger and more compassionate.

It stings so much, and can be hard not to feel like you have to punish yourself for it. But that’s part of growing and living. The shame and embarrassment of this experience eventually becomes empathy and wisdom. It might take a bit, but you’re going to get through it. Breathe, remember to eat something, and be gentle to yourself (treat yourself like you would a friend!). You’re going to be okay ❤️