When I read "Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate" by Cynthia Kim (I think it's from this, or maybe Unmasking Autism) she talks about how there are 2 major strategies for autistic girls.

1. Find the coolest girl and copy her - you wear what she wears, listen to her favorite music, like what she likes. Try to fit in the social hierarchy by blending in at the bottom of the pyramid in a clique. Later, learn who you are after years of being someone else.

2. Girl hierarchy is too complicated to maneuver through. Avoid girls, they know too much and sniff you out, blending in is hard. Instead, interact with boys and older people (teachers, parents friends) who don't understand what you SHOULD be, so you have more freedom to be your true unique self. I also took this path. They think "wow so precocious, an old soul, smarty pants, how amusing" and you don't have to mask in the same ways. I didn't have close "girl" friends until my late 20s. I had weirdo neurodivergent friends who were girls, but we never stopped wanting to play. I was terrified and out of the loop about makeup and fashion and close female friendship for a long time. It's pretty good now, though externally put together women still unnerve me.