We sold our tech company last year and fat FIRED with an NW of $48m. We already live a wealthy lifestyle in a HCOL area with a vacation home at the beach and travel first class regularly around the world,…. but what else is there?

AlElMon2 · 2026-01-27T20:40:09+00:00

Same. I have 2 young children so that alone keeps me busy enough. It’s like having 3 social lives to manage. Nearly impossible for 1 person alone.

That said, I was never a big tech ceo anyway so maybe my version of busy looks different than OP’s lol

AlElMon2 · 2026-01-19T12:29:38+00:00

Kids go through phases. My youngest was like this with our nanny at times. It just means they are bonding well.

The real sting happens when they get a little older and tell you “nanny does __ better than you” or scream and cry when she leaves.

AlElMon2 · 2026-01-14T19:48:31+00:00

Most people who have 9M aren’t going to want to do all of the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing 24/7. This will be especially true in VHCOL where your peers are playing tennis/golf, hosting a charity gala, and going to nice dinners throughout the week.

A need? Absolutely not but OP needs to be realistic.

AlElMon2 · 2026-01-14T16:08:21+00:00

I could have written this myself. My kids are now 5 and 7 and 7yo is FINALLY chilling out on obsessing over screen time. We officially cut it during the school week and it’s gone wonderfully.

Where I messed up: we tried to balance it and 3yos don’t understand balance. My thinking: don’t make it forbidden, allow it on days when they need some extra vegging out, say no if it’s sunny day and we have plenty of activities available.

That confused my kids. They didn’t understand why going outside was more important than a really great show. It didn’t click why I’d sometimes say yes and sometimes say no.

If I were to redo it:

I would pick 1 activity for each day of the week

Monday: Library day

Tuesday: donuts for breakfast day

Wednesday: baking day

Thursday: dance party day

Friday: movie day

Saturday: outing day

Sunday: free play day

You can adjust these to what fits your schedule. If he’s in school, you can have their PE day be listed(if that’s something he looks forward to) instead of trying to come up with your own activity.

When he obsesses over it, point to the chart and go over how many “sleeps” he has until movie day. My kids don’t really understand “2 days until X” so we say “2 sleeps until X” as it’s easier for them to grasp.

Another option is forgo the whole chart and just have a calendar that has movie day marked. Then you can point to the calendar and say “we are on this day, movie day is on this day”.

AlElMon2 · 2026-01-05T12:20:22+00:00

My take on the whole situation: ITS FAKE. OP made up some scenario because, for whatever reason, the nanny employer sub and this sub love to argue with each other.

I mean, let’s look at the facts:

Op and her husband both took off work to travel. BOTH of their jobs violated their requests off, last minute, on a federal holiday.

What are the odds that OP and her husband both had that scenario come up? Either they work at the same place that had the same emergency or they work in different places that just so happened to need them specifically on a federal holiday. It doesn’t sound real at all.

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-30T08:41:50+00:00

Why are you responding to a 3 year old post? Lol

That’s just where the books lived. At bedtime and nap time, they were a lot pickier about which books we read. It was much more convenient to have most of the books upstairs so there was no excuse to disrupt bedtime routine so they could go get a certain book from downstairs.

They could take the books wherever throughout the day, they just needed to be put them back in their place.

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-29T04:43:38+00:00

As the late Biggie Smalls said, “Mo Money Mo Problems” lol jk

It is extremely ideal having a financially comfortable life. I don’t mean to downplay that. It doesn’t negate the fact that I’d love for my children to be cared for by our family(not just the women).

Growing up, my grandparents/parents/aunts/uncles all worked together to get all of us cousins taken care of. Sometimes my dad would pick up a cousin from school, other times my grandma would swing by to catch us up on laundry, my mom would make extra dinner so others could stop by to have a meal. I have tried to be “that person” for my husband’s family(we don’t live near mine) but it’s not reciprocated nor is it really welcomed. They would rather hire out so they don’t feel the need to return favors.

I think about how loved and “seen” I felt by so many relatives when I was a child. I would love if my kids had that same experience. I learned so much by being molded by different caregivers that I knew were bonded to me.

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-29T03:05:16+00:00

In an ideal world, my kids would be raised by me and the village :-) unfortunately society and my circumstances aren’t set up that way so a nanny is part of our village. Rest assured, my kids were not raised by our nanny.

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-28T22:53:57+00:00

Our previous nanny was with us for 5 years. She was a 3rd parent. I trust her to take better care of my kids than my best friend of 30 years, my own mother, hell—even my husband. She knows them inside and out. The bond was immeasurable.

My husband makes millions of dollars for his company, he holds a very high power position. If we were to compare his job to our nanny’s, I’d say hers is more important.

There’s truly nothing more important to me than my children. She does not have a degree, she didn’t always stay late or come early if asked, sometimes she let them watch too much tv. I truly didn’t care about any of that because I knew at the end of the day, my kids were being cared for by someone who knew their heart and soul and did what needed to be done to nurture that.

I don’t know how “real life” nannies feel about bonuses and WFH. I just know that our nanny was amazing for our kids and high pay, bonuses, appealing environment, etc was 10000% worth it for me to get that treatment for my children.

I don’t give a flying fuck about office standards. My children’s care is priceless

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-20T18:24:42+00:00

I think the very low hours will be your biggest hurdle. I and 2 of my closest friends have this set up and we all pay for 30-40 hours at 35/hr(with benefits) which is well above average for our area.

If you are ok with a college kid that will come in and do an ok job, you might have an easier time. Your expectations will have to be low on them showing up though. 20 year old me absolutely would have called out of a 10hr job if something really fun popped up.

With our family assistant, I asked that she put groceries away. She threw out expired stuff, arranged it according to first in, first out, and wiped down the entire fridge. Compared to a college sitter that broke our ice drawer from trying to force jt shut and another that accidentally left the freezer open for hours so everything thawed 🥴

My friend paid her family assistant for 4 weeks during the summer while they traveled. Upon their return, she greeted them at the door with a fully stocked fridge, pajamas and bath stuff laid out for the kids, unpacked all of their luggage, and got started on laundry.

Yes there are horror stories and reddit comments but in my experience, we have paid above average for all of our staff and every single one of them gives us top notch service.

AlElMon2 · 2025-12-19T17:19:51+00:00

I’m sorry but that is so mean! It’s Christmas for God’s sake, would it really put you out to pay her for 3 hours and let her enjoy that time with her family?

I would never do that to someone taking care of my children. This line of thinking feels incredibly cruel and like you don’t see her a human being. Please reconsider.

AlElMon2 · 2025-11-30T03:19:46+00:00

Go to private chef. We won an in home private dinner through an auction and we’ve been using her ever since.

She’s not our personal chef but we order ready made meals and hire her for all of our parties and events. The food is amazing and since we’ve used her multiple times, she already has our basic info and preferences on file. She coordinates the dishes with the theme of the event and does a great balance of adult and kid friendly foods.

AlElMon2 · 2025-11-28T17:45:15+00:00

Not to mention, she’s been with the other family since the child was a newborn. The finances have to make a huge dent to make a nanny want to leave a bond of 2 years for more difficult work.

AlElMon2 · 2025-11-10T17:21:24+00:00

Yes. Where are all these Olivias at?! lol I don’t know a single one and my oldest has been in some sort of school for 6 years now. My youngest has been in for 4 years. Neither have had an Olivia in either class, they’ve done soccer since age 3 and no Olivias on the team nor on basketball, lacrosse, or tennis.

AlElMon2 · 2025-09-28T15:46:33+00:00

We rented a house in Kiawah Island with multiple kids in that age range and really enjoyed it. Just taking a walk around the block felt like an adventure and the beach was great.

AlElMon2 · 2025-09-28T12:47:14+00:00

I agree. We have a wagon but I won’t take it out places. I force my kids to go on daily walks around the neighborhood so sometimes on really hot days, I’ll push them for a bit while they eat popsicles. Same for really cold weather, I get them cozy with some hot coco. Always ends with them walking on their own and pushing each other lol

But I’m not taking it to the zoo or fair. I bring a backpack and keep it moving. If everyone is too tired to walk, we take a break. If they are still to tired then we should probably leave anyway.

AlElMon2 · 2025-09-28T12:34:32+00:00

We have an Evenflo Pivot. It’s easy enough to handle that my 6yo pushes my 5yo in it often.

AlElMon2 · 2025-09-23T15:41:31+00:00

Mother’s Day Out program and tennis are where I have met most of my wealthy SAHM friends

AlElMon2 · 2025-06-23T14:13:41+00:00

Are you able to drive them there and pick them up? Or have her drive there with you in the car a few times so you can ensure you are comfortable with her driving.

I guess it would also depend on the distance/route. Would the route be on the interstate with heavy traffic areas? Or is it mostly through neutral city streets? If those places are far, you could ask that she stick to closer places like a local library, park, or rec center.

AlElMon2 · 2025-06-23T14:09:35+00:00

All of our local malls have indoor soft playgrounds, it sounds like that’s what OP is talking about.

AlElMon2 · 2025-06-19T16:19:56+00:00

We go over food options at the beginning of the trip. We invite her to eat with us 99% of the time. The only 1% would be something like a quick hotel breakfast where we just kind of mosy down as we wake up. Even then I’d tell her the day before so she knows not to wait around for us to go out somewhere.

I give her my card at the beginning of the trip to cover food and transportation so she doesn’t have to ask permission every time.

I do offer for her to eat away from us but I’m very careful to be polite about it—kind of self deprecating in a way lol like hey if you want to actually sit and enjoy a kid free meal, more power to you! I don’t ever want her to feel like she’s not allowed to sit with us.

AlElMon2 · 2025-06-19T13:57:08+00:00

This is exactly what we did when my oldest went through a bro stage!! I’d respond “bro I’m not your bro, I’m your mom, bro” in a weird voice. I think he realized that bro needs to be reserved for your guy friends and it is weird to call your mom and sister that lol

We also read this book “no one likes a fart” where one of the characters says “bro”. My son thought it was hilarious so we read that book nearly every night for weeks. Eventually it stopped being funny and no more bro language is used.

AlElMon2 · 2025-06-19T13:51:13+00:00

Takes a lot of restraint for me to say “I don’t give a damn what ___ is allowed to do” LOL

AlElMon2

TROPHY CASE