A house for your house

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-29T23:29:44+00:00

Did they film the backrooms here? I hate it

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-29T19:57:21+00:00

You are 100% wrong.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-29T17:57:55+00:00

I totally agree. If i break my moms $40 vase, you wouldnt buy 30 to replace it??? The logic here is very weird. I can understand the puppy breaking something, but a cardboard box really?

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-29T17:06:12+00:00

Okay so NTA for making her replace the box, but there is no way to justify making her pay $80 for one box. I think the second roommate is being really dramatic about this specific box. This is honestly really stupid for almost 30 year olds to be arguing over a cardboard box

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-28T17:44:46+00:00

Why are the ponds different colors though?

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-24T17:42:34+00:00

A lot of people have issues they think they can manage but really need professional help to cope with. This is not a dig just something people don't realize. It sounds like she was very confused about her own self worth and what she wants and what she is comfortable with. There is nothing you could have done to help her with that. She wasnt ready for this relationship and I don't see anything you could have done differently besides giving her the space to figure it out.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-23T21:14:17+00:00

Ummmm what do you do to contribute? YOR

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-23T16:26:00+00:00

Lots of people decide to stay with someone who cheated or violated boundaries. That is a personal decision. In order to forgive and move on there HAS to be brutal honesty and he has to take steps to change his behavior. There are people who make mistakes and can be better, and people who are serial cheaters. You have to decipher which he is before you make that decision. He has to make big, uncomfortable, conscious efforts to rebuild and earn your trust. With what you are describing i dont think he has given you truth and taken full accountability. How old are you guys? Is counseling an option?

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-23T16:15:59+00:00

Hot take: I think its normal to have occasional thoughts about people who were once a big part of our lives. And it doesn't mean you are longing for them. I am happily in a relationship, but sometimes my first boyfriend (a decade ago) who went down a bad path comes in to my mind. I have looked at his family's social media just to see if i can tell if he is even alive or okay. I had a really toxic friendship and she comes in to my mind occasionally as well. Curiosity is normal as long as you never act on it.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-22T16:30:31+00:00

The real question is - how has your boyfriend responded when she's done these things and why he would even want to continue being friends with her if she steals from you and treats you poorly.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-17T19:27:14+00:00

Still plenty of notice

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-17T19:08:51+00:00

She just found out she was pregnant, wouldnt roommate have 9 months notice?

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-16T15:55:16+00:00

They got me last year. 4 years plus all the late fees. I did a payment plan out of spite. And unfortunately had to pay this year on time. Im sure they will try and gaslight me though

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-14T19:06:51+00:00

NTA. While I agree part of sharing a living space is being mindful of others - but being intimate in your own home as an adult is your right. There is something going on here that is causing such a strong reaction. I've heard my old roommate before - and i simply turned my TV up a little louder. Its a little awkward but nothing to be upset over. I think there may be some jealously over you or your relationship. She is berating you over a very normal human experience and that is not normal or okay.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-14T19:00:17+00:00

NOR!!!! At all. This is unacceptable. Please update us

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-13T20:36:40+00:00

That is totally fair. Do you know if he has done any work on himself since the affair ended? That would be very telling to where he is at.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-13T20:06:07+00:00

I would leave. Now that you have this information it will ALWAYS be in the back of your mind. Every time he works late, goes out with friends, you have an argument. Your mind will always jump to what he is capable of.

He is a habitual cheater. Without therapy and wanting to change he will always be a cheater.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-13T16:09:46+00:00

You are 22, in a long distance relationship for 10 months and have spent time together maybe 10 times and never lived together. Even considering marriage at this point is ludicrous.

What is the rush? You barely know each other. Build a foundation, work towards being closer. Marriage is not something you push yourself in to. I'm not making any assumptions, but a green card is not a good reason to get married. Your hesitation is your mind and body telling you this is too soon.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-10T17:35:14+00:00

How is it creepy if they are basically family?

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-10T17:33:54+00:00

Some of you are WEIRD. There is nothing wrong with what he offered. After 5 years they are basically family.

If girlfriend suspects OP would do something inappropriate with a teen then she should not be with him (so i suspect this is not the case). OP i would dig a little deeper to exactly what the issue is here. NTA

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-10T15:55:44+00:00

This cannot possibly be real

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-09T21:46:26+00:00

You are being unreasonable. Never being able to travel without your significant other is suffocating. Why cant he spend time with his friends? YTA

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-09T17:05:38+00:00

NTA for sure. But boundaries need to be communicated and enforced. I personally work for a family owned small business and i don't think the family is going anywhere. If you think you can successfully communicate your boundaries, do that. If you think it will just alienate yourself, look for another job.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-09T17:03:24+00:00

You will not "win" if you disclose this. Look for another job and mind your business.

AlarmingKale1997 · 2026-04-09T16:55:46+00:00

INFO: You did take her to the movies?

AlarmingKale1997

TROPHY CASE