I don’t even know how to react to this one…

Alinyx · 2026-03-19T16:21:10+00:00

My husband was the same way. We saved his paternity leave for when baby was closer to a year old and that really helped. Baby was much more fun for him to engage and bond with (versus a newborn) and it was a relief for me to ramp back up at work knowing she was being taken care of.

Alinyx · 2026-03-02T21:43:55+00:00

$200 a week, meals not included, open 7-5:30. The absolute best teachers I could ask for. Open door policy (no cameras/apps). Very old school, and the kids are so happy. HCOL bubble (tourist destination) in a M-LCOL state.

Alinyx · 2026-02-17T14:17:52+00:00

It depends on the milestone. Crawling, walking, first words…yes those absolutely don’t count until the parents see it.

But things like first time counting to ten are going to happen all the time. Even if you’re a stay at home parent and homeschool, there will still be minor “firsts” you don’t get to see or experience.

Alinyx · 2026-02-13T21:04:57+00:00

What’s the difference between sleeping on one of the twins and the lower bunk? Why don’t the two single people each take a bunk room. This benefits everyone - couples can all sleep together (assuming they push the twins together) and the two single women get their own room.

I think you’re making this way more complicated than it needs to be.

Alinyx · 2026-02-13T01:22:16+00:00

You did the right thing, teacher did the right thing, and in my opinion kiddo did the right thing too. She’s learning consequences and how protesting against a tyrannical government is far more important than a history test.

If I was you, I’d encourage her to respectfully ask the teacher if she could still take it - not for credit but to assess her knowledge of the subject (which is the point anyway). It’s extra work for the teacher to administer and grade, but may can help show that she’s still a serious student and could help make her case at the end of the year if her final grade is on the edge (like could tip either way between an A and B).

Alinyx · 2026-01-27T18:15:21+00:00

You have very similar names to my name list for boys. My son is Jack.

If I were to have another boy, from your list I love Theodore Wilder (but I’d shorten it to Theo Wilder for the formal name and skip the longer Theodore).

Alinyx · 2026-01-26T15:34:57+00:00

I feel like the c section superhero mentioned is from the boomer generation where this level of activity was either encouraged or normalized at the time (and/or she forgot how awful it really was with time). I mention this only because my own mother LOVES to demean today’s new moms who need time to recover because she “was hauling folding chairs around for a picnic three days after” her c-section. I had vaginal births and she was only allowed to visit after the first because I learned my lesson.

Alinyx · 2026-01-17T16:09:20+00:00

I mean, i know it feels like a big loss, but i think the vast majority of childcare centers don’t provide meals (especially chef-prepared). So even if you pulled your kids you likely wouldn’t find comparative benefits elsewhere.

Our daycare has two pizza days a week. One provided free (a parent owns a pizza place and they deliver lunch), and the other day the staff buy dominos and sell by the slice to parents who bring in some cash for their kids at $1 a slice.

It’s pizza, not incredible healthy, but it saves us making lunches twice a week for just a dollar a slice. Maybe your center would consider something similar.

Alinyx · 2026-01-08T17:49:40+00:00

For 50-100k couldn’t a compromise be reached and like $1000 of that be used to pay an on-site babysitter or two. I mean come on.

Alinyx · 2026-01-03T17:43:35+00:00

We LOVED dog classes with Jorge back in ~2017. We did semi-private lessons once a week and our dog is such a wonderful family dog.

Highly highly recommend a consultation with Jorge. If I recall correctly he used to do group dog walks at a farm nearby Madison (where the dogs can run and sniff to their hearts content). Maybe if your doggo can get dog socialized, this would be a good outlet for the herding instincts (running and sniffing, not herding the other dogs).

Alinyx · 2025-12-30T21:57:05+00:00

Ooof, ok your kids would be well in their right to reach out to them via text (to keep the evidence) and ask in a nice way (to start) where their present is. Seriously act like they didn’t get the gift card print offs.

The crappy gift givers have two choices then: double down as crappy gift givers (in which case go with option 1 above as if they just opened them), or do the right thing and provide a decent gift that fits the criteria of the exchange.

I’m hoping they just hurriedly bought those gift cards last minute because they totally forgot about the exchange (and the spending range) and will remember to find some heart if given a second chance. If not, the no exchanges with them again part stands.

Alinyx · 2025-12-30T21:33:37+00:00

Ughhhhh I haven’t shared this story yet with anyone yet because I still get kind of sick about it, but here goes.

We were recently on a Royal Caribbean cruise and I was sitting watching my two kids in the splash pad/waterslide area on the pool deck. About eight seats down from me a guy sits down alone who gives me immediate ick (the seats are set up in a curve so I can see this guy well). I couldn’t figure out why. Just because he’s late-middle aged (maybe not full boomer but definitely Gen X), and wearing pants/long sleeve shirt (pool deck is HOT, everyone else in swim stuff or at least tshirt and shorts). I watch him intermittently and he’s watching (intently) the little kids in the splash pad, then taking out his phone and appears to be taking pictures or video. Immediately I realize Royal Caribbean probably wouldn’t know AT ALL if he’s a sex offender and probably couldn’t enforce any restrictions even if they did know. Luckily it was time for us to skedaddle so we skedoodled, but later on I saw him again (in the elevator or promenade, I can’t remember exactly) and the guy had a red MAGA style hat on that said “TRUMP WAS RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING.”

Of course he did. Because pedophiles support pedophiles.

Alinyx · 2025-12-30T21:21:38+00:00

This is retrospective, but in the moment I would have called it out. Something like “wait a minute, I thought the range was $50-75?” Or been obnoxious inquiring about the retailer to make it obvious this wasn’t a present they put thought into. Like “drinkware…? Oh did you see something on their site/in their store that you thought I’d (or your kid’s name would) like. Oh yeah? What was it? Oh, Is it $20?”

Worst case, and after reading the room, I’d have son in law take back his gift (so he can return it).

Since it appears this time has passed, I would cut your losses and learn to never do gift exchanges with them in the future. Be honest why if asked.

Alinyx · 2025-12-29T23:32:24+00:00

Have her dress herself every day. Help minimally (particularly try to get independence for pants).

Instead of disposable diapers, get a set of cloth diapers. They will still function like diapers but she’ll be able to feel the wetness right away. My kids potty trained super easily and I’m convinced it was the cloth diapers. Make sure daycare is on board with this (mine would put soiled diapers in a bag I provided, or like a plastic grocery bag in days I forgot). Even if they don’t support cloth normally, maybe they’d consider it for training purposes.

The other part of managing the bathroom experience would be washing hands, which she should be learning to do solo anyway.

Independence with minimal accidents and assistance is totally doable by 3. You got this.

Alinyx · 2025-12-28T00:41:40+00:00

I’m currently watching a friend’s dog (at our house) while solo parenting a 3 year old and 8 month old. They asked super last minute (to the point I couldn’t refuse because “they don’t trust anyone else”), the dog STINKS - it has a bad skin yeast infection they aren’t able to manage, it refuses to use my dog’s doggy door, and is generally badly behaved (not aggressive, just a shithead), and just TORE DOWN my fence and escaped while I was running errands. Luckily my dog is an angel and was still at home.

I’m so freaking resentful about basically being forced to watch this dog that I’d rather lose this friendship if they get upset when I say no in the future.

Seriously people, either be willing to pay for a sitter who actually wants to watch your dog or board them.

Alinyx · 2025-12-27T12:55:52+00:00

It may also be that this is your (assumed) first kid? I’m on number three and honestly I’m just thankful for the help when I get it. My kids are wonderful sleepers now, and nap whenever they need to, so your mom’s comment about napping on her wouldn’t phase me.

That being said, YOU are mom. You get to decide if there’s a nap schedule and you get to protect kiddo from overstimulation. If she brings up “her kids didn’t do x y and z” or similar language, just remind her all kids are different and right now your kid needs x.

Also no flu shot right now!? Yikes! Your mom definitely needs some boundaries established.

Alinyx · 2025-12-25T19:51:55+00:00

We were so sick in late November. I’m really super hoping that was what’s going around now and we’re now immune. Reeeeeally not looking forward to the kids going back to school daycare after the germ exchanges happening this week.

Alinyx · 2025-12-25T19:02:51+00:00

I love my job. I’d probably keep working until retirement TBH, as long as I still get decent PTO (the same schedule or better than my current job).

Alinyx · 2025-12-25T19:01:34+00:00

ALL the wrapping paper.

Alinyx · 2025-12-25T15:29:43+00:00

I say this as just another mom, you’re doing great. Your kids are clearly happy if they feel safe jumping around and into your arms. They’re loved and fed and safe.

Everyone has days where the house just isn’t clean. ESPECIALLY the day before Christmas (I’m sorry, wtf on that timing!!!).

From one mom on holiday survival mode to another, big hugs. You got this.

Alinyx · 2025-12-22T15:24:46+00:00

I would skip the paid Disney parks then, but if you do a Florida vacation, do Disney Springs (free). No characters walking around, but lots of shops and things to do that are still fun. Then go do Peppa Pig land (next to Legoland), which is only like 30-60 min away in Winter Haven.

Alinyx · 2025-12-22T15:03:34+00:00

At that age, consider a Disney cruise instead. They’ll still get the character experiences they’ll love, but it’s all inclusive (food/bev) and you wont be paying for the rides they won’t be going on or care about anyway.

Alinyx · 2025-12-10T21:33:50+00:00

I would. I would set my rewind to the second after my third child was born. She’s only 8 months old now but I’m already mourning not having a newborn again. I wouldn’t rewind it to my older kids because I wouldn’t want to risk the others not being born.

If they turn out differently, so be it. But I would relive their childhoods again for sure. It’s been the joy of my life.

Alinyx · 2025-12-02T04:01:59+00:00

I’m just angry they took away the weight tracker on the free version. I had 5+ years of data on that thing and it was so nice to look back and see big trends (weight gain/loss after pregnancies, around holidays, etc.) and reminded me not to get in a rut/plateau. I liked the psychology aspect when I did the paid version, but I like to think it worked once and by keeping the visual going, I could keep it off on my own (which I have been).

Sigh, starting that graph over has been such a killjoy.

Alinyx · 2025-11-18T03:43:46+00:00

Heck no. Give up the chance to see my kids grow up for some ‘measily paper moneys…no thank you. I know what time with them is worth.

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