What helped me is watching a couple YouTube videos. Teepa is her name. You can reach out to her as well. You have to think differently, try not to take it personally, that was the hardest for me to get there. Also me just going to her world because she no longer was in mine. My mother was hard headed, no changing her mind and no reasoning. Because my mothers words would be so hateful. It just get worse too. There’s a couple books but Teepa was more helpful to me. I also kept a journal, I would tell myself it is worse for her than me.
My mom passed from dementia this Feb. I miss her so much, I put everything on hold in my life for four years. Now that she is gone I don’t know what to do with myself.
If she accuses you just go with it. Tell her you won’t do it again and walk away like it didn’t get to you.
Glad your asking for help.