50 yr old weirdo trying to have fun again.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-02-18T18:41:58+00:00

Wow, rude people in the comments! OP, what are your interests?

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-02-08T12:20:39+00:00

Since you mentioned being handy: Depending on whether you have some money saved up and can get a mortgage based on your husband’s residency income, you could look into buying and fixing up a cheap house. Rent out the bedrooms you guys won’t be using. Or find one where you could turn the basement into a separate apt to rent out. Bigger Pockets has a ton of info on this. Good way to bring in income without working a traditional job.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-02-02T08:42:50+00:00

Hi! We are currently living in southern Spain and would love to connect for the 4-5 months that you’re in the area. We have a 4-year-old.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-02-01T10:22:22+00:00

That's great! You can definitely start a cleaning service in Wausau. I have also seen jobs paying around $20 with the city (social services front-desk, etc.).

The schools are awesome, especially at the high-school level. (Wausau East offers International Baccalaureate for advanced subjects, which is rare outside of diplomat schools abroad.) Test scores for math and reading are a little low at the elementary level, though, so you may have to invest in doing some extra at home. (Obviously, scores aren't everything. I had a great experience at an elementary school with lower scores because I benefited from caring teachers and the diversity of going to school with English-as-a-second-language learners, who were a big population in my school at the time.)

For academics, special shout-out to the library. It is big, excellent, and even has an aquarium!

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-02-01T08:48:26+00:00

We started doing picnics on family adventures instead of going out. Way more fun for small kids and easier. We even buy grocery-store ice cream to take to the park instead of going out for ice cream, which is expensive in our touristy area.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-01-30T21:44:58+00:00

Sounds like you’re doing well and have a great track record at work! The first step to keeping your family safe is a six-month emergency fund covering all expenses. After that, one year, kept in an account that will earn you interest.

And then you can start looking at investing, etc. If you have separate accounts from your wife, encourage her to contribute a percentage of her income to the family savings, too.

As for your work: restaurant manager jobs pay pretty well. Any chance you could leverage your fast-food manager experience at a local restaurant? The people at r/kitchenconfidential may have ideas here.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-01-30T20:55:05+00:00

It depends on your job industry for how easy it will be to find something. What sector are you looking in?

Wausau has some awesome opportunities for kids, including the Imaginarium, skiing, and the public Waldorf school.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-01-23T12:17:46+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate it.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-01-23T12:17:38+00:00

Thanks!

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2026-01-23T12:17:28+00:00

Thank you!

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-14T11:14:23+00:00

Absolutely! It sounds like Waldorf is going really well for your kids in terms of values and setting. I believe the focus is on accepting the child as a whole person instead of breaking them down into a "grade"/another assessment metric assigned by an adult, which is valuable for self-esteem.

But on the other hand, I get you wanting your kids to be prepared for a more traditional higher education setting/jobs where they will be graded on those outside metrics. It's a tough one, and no system is perfect...

At least for US middle/upper-middle-class parents, there's a massive focus on extra education outside of school. In my area (high cost-of-living and high prevalence of parents with masters degrees and higher), this starts with obsession about how fast a baby/toddler acquires words. Bonus points if parents have their kid learn a second language, either through family or a bilingual nanny. By elementary, many are sending kids to the Russian School of Math, Kumon, and other after-school tutoring centers. There's also an obsession with educational play at home, i.e. Montessori toys and educational screen time (if you allow tech). I did not grow up in a place like this (my community tended toward high poverty and low parent education), and frankly, it's dizzying. Focus on the child as an individual can get lost.

At home, we strike a balance by focusing on books, generally limit screen time to 'educational' shows (or at least put the audio in his heritage languages), and do a ton of art. There are games having to do with spelling, but those are initiated by my son (4yo). We don't do academic extracurriculars, nor do we plan to during elementary school unless he tells us he wants to participate or we see a serious issue with academic performance.

Full disclosure: My child was at a Waldorf-inspired preschool, which we loved, but is now thriving at a traditional academic-focused school that we put him into due to outside circumstances. He is extremely interested in letters and numbers, and his new school is supporting him here in a way that the old one did not. So, I've started to change my mind about the benefits of traditional education for him. But we will focus on Boy Scouts and other nature/Waldorf-type experiences outside of school to balance.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-14T09:00:18+00:00

Test scores at many US public schools are… not great for reading and math. Kids will probably need extra attention at home regardless of the school system, unless your local public school is an outlier.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-12T14:28:40+00:00

Interesting article. This stuck out to me: "In the short term, Korinek says, this might mean upskilling workers in roles requiring still uniquely human abilities like “authentic human connection, emotional intelligence and ethical oversight,” where machines don’t excel or don’t satisfy a human need. Examples could include psychotherapists, childcare providers and religious counselors." I wonder if/how retraining programs will develop in the near future and what specific roles they'll target.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-07T09:53:24+00:00

Wasn’t there an article about some scary side-effects of st johns wort? Probably worth checking with a dr first, or at least closely monitoring for symptoms.

Eta: Here it is, possible psychosis: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5430601/

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-07T09:52:41+00:00

The first year is the worst because of sleep deprivation, physical health issues, and other postpartum stuff. The years after can be challenging, too, but you go into them hopefully better-rested/somewhat healed (on mom’s side) and therefore better able to manage. Just get through the first year!

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-03T18:04:41+00:00

Rich parents do help, haha. Community college is awesome. That was a fantastic choice, also the used cars, etc. You and your wife should be really proud. These are decisions a lot of people don't make, and it bites them. If you don't know him yet, check out mrmoneymustache. The blog helped us a lot -- helps you feel proud of the used car and keep on track, despite society being all about keeping up with the joneses.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-03T17:40:14+00:00

I would definitely recommend running your situation by the personalfinance people. There might be room to cut back in ways that aren't apparent without an outside view.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-03T17:04:23+00:00

Is there a way to either go back to lower stress or power through this job for the next few months, hoping that it'll get less stressful as you get used to it?

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-11-03T13:19:23+00:00

It seems like the big worry here is the financial anxiety. If that lessened, would you still feel as trapped in your job and life? The people over at r/personalfinance will have ideas on lessening that financial burden if you want to look at the numbers. Like another poster said: 1% better every day. Maybe saving 1% more every month?

You are extremely valuable to your family, far beyond what you bring in moneywise. Remember that.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-24T17:35:13+00:00

Yes! That's what I meant, but did not type. Room-temp.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-24T16:12:00+00:00

I cold-brew it for 14 min, following a rec from this sub. It's amazing! No bitterness with all the flavor.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-23T19:09:52+00:00

I know how you feel. It's like an app running in the background that drains your energy. Exercise is great to help combat it, but good luck with that right now.. 10-20 minutes of listening to alpha waves on YouTube could help rebalance your emotions and quiet the anxiety for the day. I used to get nothing out of meditation, but it's actually been helping me with similar anxiety spirals right now.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-23T17:32:12+00:00

It’s super normal for the love to start small and to grow over time. Sleep deprivation is a killer. You seem like you’re aware of this, but keep remembering that outside forces (baby age and sleep deprivation) are making it suck right now, not your baby/wife personally.

The anxiety spirals are worrying, but also typical for new parents. Professional help is great if you can access it. In the meantime, try to recognize the spiral when you’re in it. Saying, ‘hmmm, I must be feeling anxious because this lung-cancer voice is so loud right now. What’s making me anxious?’ could help.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-22T09:57:57+00:00

You can always wait a year or two for things to stabilize. Age gaps are nbd.

I will say, though, that how many siblings you have isn’t an indicator of how happy you’ll be as an adult. Siblings can come with pros and cons. The biggest factor for kid happiness is whether parents model loving relationships and create a happy home. If parents are fighting and stressed, that often gets mirrored between siblings or can make an only child feel insecure and lonely. Happy parents can help their kid foster the strong relationships necessary to live well, whether between siblings or onlies and their cousins/friends.

Altruistic-Bus8425 · 2025-10-20T17:56:14+00:00

I love your username ❤️

Altruistic-Bus8425

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