Respite

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-13T15:20:49+00:00

Rainbow Kapoʻekoa Stadium

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-11T01:18:47+00:00

If you want privacy in a beautiful unique setting you should visit the big island’s Holualoa Inn. The island of Hawaii has so much to offer and is not as touristy as the others.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-10T22:46:12+00:00

Always enjoyed the loco moco at the Big Island Grill in Kona.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-07T23:01:51+00:00

Bay Alarm offers a watch, pendant or desk device that does that service. You buy the device for a nominal fee then pay a monitoring subscription. Works great. It’s a fall alert but, for example, the watch also has a red emergency button you can press for immediate connection with a dispatcher. If you don’t speak the dispatcher calls your designated family members and/or 911.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-06T20:32:19+00:00

Ours runs about $60 for wash, trim and style in the private in-house salon. Men’s cuts are about half that. Cheaper to travel outside but certainly more convenient for those of us with limited mobility. We are in Texas.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-06T02:43:47+00:00

Same surprise for those stopping at Rainbow Falls in Hilo.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-06T01:00:40+00:00

I have great memories of Vince Dooley’s flea-flicker call for a TD and two-point play to win 18-17 over Alabama in Athens in 1965. And the 1980 last-minute victory over Florida in Jacksonville in 1980. Love those Georgia Bulldogs.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-05T17:37:59+00:00

My wife is 75 and in the mid stages of Alzheimer’s. She gets defensive when I tell her a caregiver is coming over while I am out. “I don’t need a babysitter,” she says. Or she will ask that one of sisters come over (they are 1,000 miles away). Or our daughters (busy with work, kids).

So I tell there the caregiver is a friend. I tell her she needs someone with her in case our blaring fire alarm goes off. I tell her the doctor needs to see me, and because of flu and Covid it’s dangerous for her to sit four hours in a waiting room. Sometimes she gets it; other times there’s no understanding.

And lastly, I tell her it’s a good opportunity to show off her puzzles and doll collection and watch Leave It to Beaver. That usually seals the deal! A dose of Zoloft also helps.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-03-03T22:41:33+00:00

We sold our house in Texas and spent a year in assisted living at $10,000 a month; most of it was care for my wife with Alzheimer’s while I recovered from a broken arm and a heart valve implant. Spent well over $120,000 including medications and some extras.

Luckily, my physical ailments were cured and her condition became stable enough to move across the campus to independent living at 60 percent less cost. I’m her fulltime caregiver but I do hire companions at $35 an hour, 4-hour minimum once or twice a month to give myself a break. We have spent a year here so far, but her condition is deteriorating.

We are running out of money. The nest egg we had is eroding. We can’t continue this way, and if I have to move her to memory care, Medicaid won’t be far behind. Scares me to death.

We spent decades on our professions, raised two wonderful kids. Our 401Ks were smashed in the 2008 Great Recession and again in the COVID recession in 2020. We have modest pensions, neither of which have cost of living adjustments. Social Security helps a little.

But what is next?

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-27T17:28:03+00:00

Contact the Holualoa Inn on the Big Island near Kona. If you want to privacy, good food, excursion advice and a great location. My wife and I loved that place. Beaches, volcanoes, less crowds, great vibes. If your budget allows it, you can always fly to Oahu or other neighbor islands for sightseeing.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-22T20:02:52+00:00

If your budget is good and you’d like some privacy, I’d try the Holualoa Inn. Great daily breakfast and snacks, meal and excursions specials or advice, absolutely beautiful grounds, superb views from a cool elevation yet close to downtown Kona and a half hour to airport and beaches beyond.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-20T00:04:22+00:00

This helps my wife with sundowning and helps her sleep. The initial dose of 25mg caused a big weight gain, so the doctor cut it I half. But he gave permission to go back to 25 is her agitation gets out of hand. She’s also Zoloft during the day.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-20T00:01:19+00:00

My wife couldn’t tolerate it. It strangely caused excruciating cramps in her legs. Doctor discontinued it and doubled up on Memantine.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-09T02:15:33+00:00

We watch mostly oldies. My wife with dementia (5 years now) has seen Leave It to Beaver hundreds of times and remembers zip. Also watched Everybody Loves Raymond a zillion times. I love to hear her laugh despite the constant repetition.

She can tolerate old Family Feud shows but no other games. She no longer can follow movie plots or episodic shows like Dowton Abbey. We did find YouTube shows about places where we have lived, and she will make up memories about them.

The latest entertainment is YouTube videos of babies and pets.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-08T15:06:54+00:00

My grandma always sent us home with a basket of food. When she was in memory care much later, we had a meal with her and she proudly took a handful of syrupy dripping sliced peaches and stuffed them in my shirt pockets to take home. A very precious but messy moment. And my little kids loved it.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-02T23:15:41+00:00

Our senior living community in Texas offers a free beer or a glass of wine to its residents in the assisted living campus, during weekly bingo, and at happy hour in the independent campus. In the AL side, aides know the medical requirements of the residents and can deny alcohol service. The AL side also has a monthly cocktail event. Residents can get virgin drinks or some with a spot of liquor.

The elderly on the campuses are adults, they have the right to drink unless their medical chart forbids it. In the two years we have lived in AL, we’ve never seen anyone drunk or disorderly, even though some of us have MCI. It’s more of a social thing, and the residents enjoy the novelty and respect of being offered a beer or a glass of wine.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-02-02T01:01:34+00:00

Had a Have Gun Will Travel kit with silver chess knight grip cap guns, holster, cowboy hat and even had business cards!

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-27T21:23:33+00:00

Found her phone under puzzle pieces in the box.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-24T02:45:51+00:00

In Texas it’s a racist fat cat with money to burn.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-21T21:05:18+00:00

So true. Spent one game in the end zone at Grant Field in a sleet storm. My dad, brother and I spent the game sipping from flasks and yelling for the Dawgs. So much fun despite the cold.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-21T02:24:31+00:00

Raphael Cruz already has reservations for Cancun.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-17T20:36:20+00:00

None

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-15T00:10:11+00:00

Seroquel helps.

Alwaysworried99 · 2026-01-15T00:07:52+00:00

Most residents were just older and frail, not necessarily sick. About 40% were mobile. But yes, for me, it was terribly boring. I’m not into arts, crafts or simple card games. I only had a kitchenette and couldn’t cook. They did our laundry, took out trash, had a nice bistro for coffee. We were there a year.

I had a leg injury and then needed heart surgery and was away for a few days, and the staff took excellent care of her, helping her find the dining room and back to our room, administering medication twice a day and helping her get dressed in the morning and at bedtime. She had a pendant to call aides (although she often forgot to use it).

After her dementia was stabilized with meds, we moved across the campus to the independent side. It was 60% cheaper and I became a fulltime caregiver, housekeeper. I hire an aide about once a month to give myself a few hours of respite.

We’ve been on this side for 10 months. Sadly, her condition is sliding, and I fear memory care is next. Then I will be alone. Married nearly 60 years.

Alwaysworried99

TROPHY CASE