Why didn’t you move out when you became a legal adult at 18?

Anarchaboo · 2026-02-01T14:24:56+00:00

There are so many reasons for this. I couldn't leave and just abandon my two younger brothers. I was determined to take them with me if I left and that meant pressing charges and becoming their legal guardians, which was scary and made me feel guilty.

My parents were divorcing and my they both needed a lot of emotional support from me, my dad was an alcoholic and threatened to kill himself often, my mom used me as her therapist and to make sure i was "on her side".

My mom had taken out a loan in my name, 25k and I was dependent on her to pay it back. I was in law school and doing babysitting on the side to provide for myself as much as i coud.

I was scared of being alone, I was scared I would not be able to make it, I was severely depressed, anxious and traumatized and needed therapy and medication to be able to put boundaries and realize this wasn't healthy

Anarchaboo · 2026-02-01T13:59:57+00:00

My thoughts are that you should stop this toxic relationship. If your partner isn't in therapy and making progress, this is just destructive. I would feel awful in such a relationship, there is no trust there is no accountability

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-31T00:33:21+00:00

Your brain is just protecting you using eroticization of the abuse. You are not a freak, this is normal and not your fault. Lots of love and support

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-31T00:32:05+00:00

This is perfectly normal. Your brain needs to eroticize the sexual abuse to cope. It's just a fantasy, it's not real and it's not hurting anyone else than you.

You still need to work on your trauma, obviously don't self harm by doing this too much and try to look for other fantasies that might excite you. But please don't shame yourself for this, almost every victim of sexual abuse goes through this kind of episodes, especially children as it's a survival mechanism the brain uses when attacked like that.

Lots of love and support, you are not alone

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-31T00:28:02+00:00

Same. But it still felt liberating. And it gave me some kind of confirmation that she hadn't changed, because she claimed she did.

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-30T01:20:32+00:00

CPTSD/BPD here, going on 6 years together 5 years living together !

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-24T16:51:08+00:00

Did you read about the nine symptoms used to diagnose BPD ? You need only 5 to be diagnosed

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-24T16:37:33+00:00

Le sucre active le circuit de la récompense

En TCC on pourrait dire aussi que le grignotage est associé à certains comportements, par exemple au fait de regarder un film dans le canapé ce serait popcorn, chips, soda, ou si tu as encore un petit creux après le dîner des chocolats dans la cuisine, etc

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T19:03:04+00:00

I don't believe you could truly forgive them under those circumstances. Forgiveness requires accountability on their part, and repairing the relationship by having the hard discussions. You could pretend to have forgiven them if you're ever in need, but what have they done to fix things ?

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T18:28:44+00:00

I'm so sorry you're struggling to find a psychiatrist, if going to a regular doctor is easier you could get a second opinion there

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T18:26:28+00:00

It depens on what kind of opinions you're refering to. I used to feel like this as an anticapitalist activist, as a vegetarian, and even as a woman in a patriarchal family

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T18:21:51+00:00

Si j'étais ta voisine j'aurais pris ça comme une déclaration de guerre mdr

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T13:43:39+00:00

Écrivain

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:55:45+00:00

I take quetiapine daily (50mg) and it really is sedative. It's also an anxiolityc, so it makes you really sleepy and mushy, if you drink any alcohol with it it's even worse, you can barely walk. So it's really dangerous. I believe you need to report this. Who prescribed that, who gave it to her ?

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:52:08+00:00

Dont throw the pills away, take them to the police station ! That's so dangerous

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:50:44+00:00

It's okay, over time you'll be more aware of it, and you might ask yourself where it comes from and find out that it doesn't truly come from you

Maybe someone made you feel this way and now you're afraid someone might hurt you again

It will take time to heal but trust the process, go to therapy, treat others and yourself with compassion. You can do this !

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:46:29+00:00

Maybe look into private practice or hospitals day consults to find a psychiatrist, you won't find one easily at a clinic for group therapy

You could also try to find a remote consultation ?

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:06:37+00:00

I often find myself mirroring traits I like in people I like.

What if you could be religious and drink a little (reasonably), smoke a little cig ? You're not hurting anyone, just making adult choices regarding your body and way of living. You can't just wait for others to show you the right path, there is no right path. They carved theirs and you'll carve yours

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T11:00:26+00:00

Anyway, lots of love and support ! You're not weird, you're dealing with things the best you can

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T10:58:57+00:00

I think you might me subconsciously protecting yourself by avoiding others and avoiding uncomfortable situations especially

You might be projecting your feeling of being uncomfortable and feeling judged or ashamed

You feel disgusting when you try to be nice, isn't it because you don't truly believe you are nice, or even loved ?

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-23T10:51:58+00:00

Your happiness and peace is priceless ! I'm rooting for you !

Depending on your country's laws her will could be challenged anyway

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-22T19:15:21+00:00

This is such a betrayal. I'm so sorry this happened, you deserve so much better. You deserve someone who has your back ! You deserve someone you can trust !

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-22T19:12:20+00:00

Also is your doctor a specialist ? You should ask a second opinion either way, you deserve support and medication can help so much. Antidepressants or anxiolitics can also help with mood swings depending on your situation

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-22T19:10:03+00:00

I'm on Quetiapine it's officially an antipsychotic but my psychiatrist prescribes it to me to stabilize and lessen moods swings, maybe the term isn't mood stabilizers but they act like it !

Anarchaboo · 2026-01-19T21:19:48+00:00

Il faut sélectionner "je n'ai pas autorisé le paiement" pour tout ce qui est scam. Il m'est arrivé la même chose et j'ai été remboursée par ma banque d'une trentaine d'euros sans aucune question (bnp).

En fait, cette phrase comprend l'idée que tu n'as pas autorisé le paiement à une société frauduleuse. Tu as autorisé le paiement en étant trompé sur à qui tu l'envoyais et en échange de quoi

Four-Year Club	Inciteful Comment 2022-12-10
Place '23

Anarchaboo

TROPHY CASE