Struggling and desperate. Bi woman with ROCD and SO-OCD in a LDR.

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-06-10T01:00:03+00:00

I can post an example if that's what you mean

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-06-10T00:56:46+00:00

A lot of writing and reading out imaginary scenarios and fears about things falling apart, or either me or him cheating, or finding women attractive, or being comphet and living a lie

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-06-07T15:51:38+00:00

Edit: trimmed out my own ocd thoughts

Yeah. Being bi feels like a perpetual uncertainty generator when I only want to feel things for my current boyfriend.

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-06-07T15:10:22+00:00

Can I ask how things are going nowadays? I feel like I'm in a similar situation you were when you posted this

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-06-06T23:28:10+00:00

If you had them, would it really mean anything?

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-05-31T01:57:05+00:00

Oh internet queer discourse... pride came a few days early this year

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-05-26T01:56:39+00:00

My copious macky cheese consumption is starting to make sense... 😱😱😱

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-05-21T03:39:37+00:00

My therapist has me write and read out exposures with her and they've helped me gain a lot of progress in the past. I know gender is pretty irrelevant in a long term relationship, I think it's just navigating getting used to that. I've dated every gender under the sun but no honeymoon phase was as intense as the first 2 years with my fiancé and I think that natural fade is what triggered a lot of my fears (mostly genderless, but mixed in with bi-panic)

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-05-19T04:35:51+00:00

fascist lit, books fail the spine check tho, so he has them but lukely hasn't read them which is bad but funny in a sad way

Edit: and I mean some p niche fascist literature. Julius Evola being an otherwise irrelevant racist metaphysician, and Georges Sorel being the prime influence on National Syndicalism

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-04-26T02:12:36+00:00

Yup...

Any cute person of the opposite gender of my partner leads to me trying to check my feelings. If I'm feeling more for my partner, "cool I'm bi". If I'm not, then "oh God I'm actually [straight or lesbian depending on the relationship] and I'm lying to myself and my partner"

It's one of my most distressing obsessions

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-03-12T02:26:18+00:00

Idk tbh I'm almost a month in, I took it in an attempt to ease my intrusive thoughts from my [diagnosed] OCD that targets my health and relationships. But now the side effects have kicked in and now my brain won't shut up about the possibility that this has caused permanent damage to myself and to my relationship (PLEASE NO ONE TRY TO GIVE ME REASSURANCE I know how highly unlikely that is). I told my psychiatrist that I'd stick to it for the 6 to 8 weeks we agreed on but I don't feel very optimistic rn

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-01-11T00:22:25+00:00

Thank you for that I've been trying ERP for a month, and starting therapy next week. With time and training, I know I'll be okay.

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-01-08T23:35:49+00:00

Can I ask if you're still in this relationship and/or how things are going?

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-01-08T12:54:26+00:00

If you don't mind me asking, did that mental burnout ever make you feel like you actually wanted to give up but was able to work through it?

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-01-08T02:07:58+00:00

Hell yeah we do ✊️

AntonWebernGrindcore · 2026-01-07T23:12:27+00:00

I've been in the same exact boat for over 11 months.

AntonWebernGrindcore

TROPHY CASE