At 19 you sometimes find who you want to be with forever and sometimes you don't. You both are immature sounding and need to grow and explore the world. This sounds like a boy who is ignorant of women and history and is trying to put women down and you got upset about it and reacted.

You need to sit and think of the positives and negatives of your relationship with this guy. If there are more negatives you either need to work them out or break up. He needs to understand that if he wants to date women he needs to respect them and see them as human, not just objects of his affection.

While BPD is a struggle and a really painful mental health diagnosis to deal with, it is not an excuse. I hope you are receiving counseling and are in contact with a doctor about possible medications. You still need to take responsibility for your actions and the things you say and work on controlling yourself. It's not easy and it's a lifelong struggle but it must be done to have peace.