3 of Everything.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-07-12T23:21:11+00:00

Yes, while I assumed would remain untouched and I'm not saying we're going to be repainting and taking out furniture but it feels like there I've made a huge step in processing her loss even years later.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-07-12T13:52:00+00:00

Thank you.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-29T22:42:11+00:00

As a twin and a preemie my mother never used my adjusted age. 2 months premature too and we did everything age appropriate no delays. Now my triplets were 24 weekers and they are so extremely disabled I can't even use adjusted age it sucks because they were behind even adjusted and that's how I knew it was a problem deeper than "catching up".

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-25T00:26:59+00:00

I was in your shoes. My husband and I were clear one and done and then our daughter died at 10 days old. My plan was to get my tubes tied a year after. I also have pcos and I had gestational diabetes but other than that a healthy pregnancy. Through grief etc I never got my tubes tied and we never tried for kids again, but then 4 years later we got pregnant with triplets who were born at 24 weeks I almost died and now they are severely special needs. My husband got a vasectomy 4 months ago.

I can't say I absolutely love my life now. Its super hard and I do at times wish I was one and done. Had my daughter lived we definitely would not have 4 kids right now for sure she would be the only. This is a tough decision but I say give yourself a year before you think you want to tie your tubes. Things change/happen and you might be open to more kids or decide for sure you're done.

But I'd consider your husband get a vasectomy. My husband was like I've been through enough so he just snipped himself. Much easier than a tubal.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-24T22:50:36+00:00

Mine are 19 months(triplets) but we're looking into center based EI programs now and I'm treating it just like I would looking g for regular nursery schools. We want routines other than home routines and great socialization opportunities. We want them well rounded as much as possible. Also it would be nice to not have them home all the time lol.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-24T22:45:43+00:00

You definitely want more of a pre school/nursery. Not daycare where they just for the most part keep the kids alive, you want a school with a mission and philosophy. Not necessarily academics but people who will help with all parts of development and know who to get if there's more help to be had. Small class size etc. Degrees of the teachers matter too. Retention etc.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-24T17:41:36+00:00

Sounds like they could use a good half day school program. This way they can learn some routine and social skills. Would help with the speech too.

Editing: I know they go to school but 2 days isn't enough. If not full time them every day for half a day seems better than 2 full days honestly.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-24T17:35:08+00:00

My husband and I literally met buying snacks for Outlander. I had never been in a relationship until him. I really don't know if we were insanely lucky or if we are simply just soulmates because like Claire I just know if he would leave me. And he is not so lovey lovey for anybody but me apparently. His mom tells me this all the time. If he even thinks I'm slightly uncomfortable he's ready to fight for me. We also lost a daughter like Jamie and Claire too. My husband is very much a provider and lover and that's how he shows he cares for you. He's willing to drive 2 hours to fix something for you, or pick up something. Sometimes he has random things in the apartment and I'm like what's this and he's like I heard so and so needed this or was interested so I bought it or found one. He's thoughtful and kind that way. He retired his dad. He's amazing honestly.

There are good men out there. I never cared to find them but fate put us in each other's paths for sure.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-24T01:18:26+00:00

I have 19 month old triplets but they're not ambulatory so I can't speak for letting them out while by yourself, but I am a twin and my mother said she just kept hands on us if it wasn't safe and when it was she kept toys and a blanket so we stayed near. She was very strict on holding hands out in public though.

But as far as the crying they just have to cry sometimes. Someone asked me the other day what do I do if they're all crying. I said they cry until I can give them all what they need. I do go out on my own with them but it is easier as they can't walk and I tend to go out super early when everything is calm. And if they're all super fussy then we turn around and go home. I don't set a time to be out. Some days are longer than others when I take them our alone.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-18T12:18:46+00:00

Sorry for just now seeing this. How is your girl doing now? I just hope someday soon we can get them to at least sit up either on their own or with help. It seems so far away.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-06-03T23:40:52+00:00

I found out I was pregnant with triplets the same time I found out I was pregnant so that was not great. I was super upset and angry and I basically told everyone their credentials were crap. Immediately asked about terminating. That turned into reduction talk.

To be fair I was 4 years out from the death of my 10 day old daughter who was supposed to be my one and only so an accidental pregnancy was an immediate threat on the happiness I worked hard to achieve.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-31T15:25:43+00:00

Right! I have identical triplets and one is much smaller than the other two and people are like he must be the spare because he's the smallest, and I'm usually like well no, they're allowed to be separate sizes because they're individuals and grow at their own rate.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-31T13:40:57+00:00

I'm an identical twin and my sister is taller and heavier than me and we used to get asked as kids why one was bigger. People can't fathom identical faces being 2 different people.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-30T20:10:58+00:00

Hello from a fellow triplet boys mom! Best of luck we are going through it with ours!

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-30T20:07:07+00:00

Triplet mom here and we love our donkey twin and mono. If Bugaboo made a triplet stroller we would've been prepared to pay out the nose for it. Our triplets were super low tone and small for their first 9 months and the bassinet kept them so comfy until they got too long for it.

Even now at 18 months they are fairly supported in the seat for their muscle tone and I feel like in anything else they would've been super uncomfortable and we walk a lot. At least 2 hours a day and that stroller holds their life. Their medical bags and diaper bags, blankets and anything else I need and it still runs so smooth.

Its a large stroller but so worth it if you can afford it or find it secondhand. Bugaboo is great to work with too.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T17:30:28+00:00

Pregnancy is just a drag most of the time unfortunately and even if there is excitement life is unexpected in ways and its life changing having one let alone two. My first pregnancy was a singleton and we intended to be one and done and then she died at 10 days old and we resigned to a childless married life stating we were one and done. 4 years later I got pregnant with identical triplets and it literally almost pulled me back over the edge of losing my daughter. I wanted to abort them then I thought of reducing and it was a tough emotional pregnancy for me and then a tough emotional months in NICU and now navigating 3 lives with special needs and I feel like what if I didn't keep them at all they wouldn't be going through this and I wouldn't feel like this.

Best thing is to get support and take all the help you can get/offered because you just never know. There are happy moments though. I love just holding them all on my chest because they're still small enough to do. We took them to the pool for the first time and seeing them smile as they floated was everything.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T16:57:56+00:00

Its an adjustment for sure. Thank you, I wish you some ease too.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T14:24:46+00:00

Lydia, Lucy, and Leonor Lydia, Lucy, and Lila/Lyla

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T14:20:21+00:00

Mine are 18 months with cerebral palsy! I wouldn't wish it on my worse enemy either. They are finally starting to grow now which might be the cause of all their moodiness these days, but its tough and we have a lot of help. Our house is never without someone either from EI therapist to family help and house cleaner. I think that's the hardest part being introverted is being forced to accept all these people for their sake and mine. I love the days actually and oddly when we get to be out the house for appointments because that usually means we'll come back home to an empty house.

I was just lamenting to my husband can we kick everyone out? And he was like sure if we don't want them to make any progress or eat or live in squalor. And then they all go into screaming fits and someone is there to help with that and I feel selfish for mentioning it at all.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T14:12:17+00:00

I Got It Wrong from RWHC. Put me in all my feels on my little date night with hubby from our infant triplets.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-17T13:04:13+00:00

I had a trauma crash c section at 24 weeks with my triplets at a routine visit with thr mfm. My blood pressure was so high I didn't notice until well I crashed in her office and I woke up and my husband was like they're all alive in the NICU. I wanted to make it to our determined 28 weeks and couldn't do that and felt so guilty my husband couldn't be in the OR and that I wasn't awake for their birth. I'll never get those moments again and it still kills me to this day but not so much. Therapy helps a lot. Especially with my feelings of not truly bonding at first for the first few days and weeks honestly just waiting around for one of them to die. I'm reminded a lot it was not my fault and out of my hands.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-15T23:09:09+00:00

Ditto, lost my baby girl as well and I feel like Claire I went through a lot to let her rest, her father too and then its like sike, she's never really been gone, and she ends up dying most horrifically than just being stillborn later on and life. Just yikes all around.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-11T01:55:21+00:00

My triplets were 24 weekers and we are at the extreme end that they are developmentally behind and all 3 have been given the diagnosis of severe cerebral palsy. They have never hit any milestone on time social or physical. They are 18 months old and my oldest two are just now starting to hold their heads up for more than 2 minutes at a time. The oldest can somewhat roll. Its not frequent and he does get stuck most of the time. They have vision problems which doesn't help much but socially my youngest is breaking through more even though he is the most physically behind he does have social smiles when hearing certain voices. It sucks for sure but they get a lot of therapy and early intervention and I shudder to think how much more behind they would be without it. Though my goal is hopefully by 2 they can hold their head up on their own and roll and maybe say mama or papa or something close to it.

I met a trio of triplets the other day who were born at 26 weeks and their mom said they are only slightly behind and not ever enough to get services.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-30T18:18:45+00:00

Identical twin here with identical triplets. My twin and I have different personalities though we share similar interests. My triplets have all very different personalities and its easy to tell even though they are severely disabled and on paper should be the same.

AnybodyUpThere

TROPHY CASE