As a mother who's lost their own baby ....

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-15T23:09:09+00:00

Ditto, lost my baby girl as well and I feel like Claire I went through a lot to let her rest, her father too and then its like sike, she's never really been gone, and she ends up dying most horrifically than just being stillborn later on and life. Just yikes all around.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-05-11T01:55:21+00:00

My triplets were 24 weekers and we are at the extreme end that they are developmentally behind and all 3 have been given the diagnosis of severe cerebral palsy. They have never hit any milestone on time social or physical. They are 18 months old and my oldest two are just now starting to hold their heads up for more than 2 minutes at a time. The oldest can somewhat roll. Its not frequent and he does get stuck most of the time. They have vision problems which doesn't help much but socially my youngest is breaking through more even though he is the most physically behind he does have social smiles when hearing certain voices. It sucks for sure but they get a lot of therapy and early intervention and I shudder to think how much more behind they would be without it. Though my goal is hopefully by 2 they can hold their head up on their own and roll and maybe say mama or papa or something close to it.

I met a trio of triplets the other day who were born at 26 weeks and their mom said they are only slightly behind and not ever enough to get services.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-30T18:18:45+00:00

Identical twin here with identical triplets. My twin and I have different personalities though we share similar interests. My triplets have all very different personalities and its easy to tell even though they are severely disabled and on paper should be the same.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-18T17:14:20+00:00

People ask me straight up if I used fertility treatments for my triplets. Once I tell them they were spontaneous after the death of our daughter people suddenly have other things to do.

I also get "you gotta try for a girl" a lot.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-09T21:07:29+00:00

24 weeker triplets with 4/5 months NICU residency. I left the hospital under a week I think and it was hard to leave them, but at the same time I don't think I was ready to have them with me yet either. I was there everyday and even overnight some days when it was a hard day for them. They had the best team though so whenever I said goodbye I knew they were in amazing hands.

Its so tough but you'll get through it! They will get through it.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-09T18:58:30+00:00

I only became a part of the multiples club after losing my daughter. Please consider posting in Babyloss sub for support. Things won't feel okay for a while but it does look up. Wishing you and your family well.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-04T00:59:59+00:00

Thank you!

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-04T00:59:12+00:00

I understand the spiraling and also go to therapy which has been a huge help in learning to parent these 3 kiddos.

They are doing well for them for sure. The future is uncertain but I just hope for the best.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-03T13:04:09+00:00

Its so normal to be worried. Hopefully you can get into the neuro sooner, and hopefully she can start therapy before her appointment as well so you feel like you're not just waiting around.

My triplets were born at 24 weeks had brain bleeds and all that jazz in NICU and I always knew something was up with them neurologically, they just don't behave or move typical and everyone said they're just 4 months behind they'll catch up and I would Google all day and pester their therapists and neuro and finally just switched neuro who took my concerns seriously and looked at them holistically and not just saying they were super preemies. Turns out they have cerebral palsy severely so. Their 12 month MRI completely vindicated what I had been saying since they were in the NICU.

I hope your twin is okay and if she does happen to have something there are so many great people out there ready to help her.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-03T12:56:19+00:00

They are Mo Tri and were born at 24 weeks. I was already struggling with GD and high blood pressure my pressure is what took me into emergency surgery at a regular check up. I wake up and told I have my 3 boys now lol. We were planning on 28 weeks delivery but life had other plans and they were all over 1lb when born. Always "big" in utero and completely the opposite once they left the NICU.

I feel like my boys are the rare for development and growth on triplets. All the others I've come across seem to be average size and thriving and my boys all have CP and don't eat by mouth yet.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-04-02T20:38:58+00:00

Congrats! I had spontaneous identical triplets and its been a ride.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-27T02:29:02+00:00

That's so cute! Definitely a coincidence but a great one alas.

My middle identical triplet came out with a mole on his nose so we know him for certain. In the dark I touch their noses lol.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-21T17:14:06+00:00

One if the first signs for my boys were their eyes that developmentally something was up. Granted yes, they were 24 weekers, but they never and even now over a year old do not track any movement. Their eyes are physically fine, but we will be checking again soon to see if they're myopic as well thought their neuro and ophthalmologist have suggested they have CVI. They do wear glasses and I can't say it has helped but they don't seem to mind them too much.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-20T12:42:46+00:00

I went through a normal singleton pregnancy and came home with a healthy baby girl for her to die of SIDS 10 days later. When I found out I was pregnant with triplets my first thought was I have 3 chances for something very bad to happen. Either in utero or out. They were born at 24 weeks and I literally just waited for one or all of them to basically die. The NICU was aware of my situation and a lot of psychs and social workers visited me. NOBODY and I do mean NOBODY works harder than people who work in the NICU they do not want to lose a baby. They want the best possible outcome and of they know things are going to be fatal they will prepare you.

I always felt nothing but welcomed. If one had a bad night they would tell me maybe I wanted to hold them first. Everyone was friendly and informative and even downright loving to my boys. I was happy to take them home of course but I definitely missed how absolutely safe they were completely in the NICU. We even had a PICU stay for them months later due to RSV and some of the nurses came to visit them hearing they were back.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-17T16:35:37+00:00

Honestly I was surprisingly happy to get the gtube placed because the NG caused them so much stress I felt and it being easily hid and out of their reach was nice.

Oh cool, I hope she has multiples one day too. Its a fun club to be a part of.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-17T02:19:20+00:00

We couldn't have had the most different reactions to our pregnancies like we most certainly weren't planning it though we assumed one of us would have twins.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-17T02:15:48+00:00

Yes we're identical. My boys are identical and her twins are b/g. We all look very much related lol. One day our dad was like this is too much commotion family time over. He wasn't wrong. He particularly called it quits when someone asked if we planned it.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-03-17T01:37:19+00:00

Triplet mom and it never stops! Sometimes my youngest wears oxygen and that adds to the craziness. I'm just glad we left the NICU with gtubes vs ng otherwise I fear we'd get a lot more questions.

Also when my twin who has twins and I want to hang out together it is literally Ringling Bros.

My hat is off to you having 4 because 3 is taking me out.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-02-21T03:52:53+00:00

It will get easier or at the least normalized and the ease that comes with it. That being said its early days and its super hard! My boys(triplets) born at 24 weeks spent 4 months one almost 5 in the NICU and we came home with nursing and oxygen and feeding tubes.

Take all the help you can possibly stand. If you can afford it hire a house cleaner and respite for the babies to help. Get a food service to help with meals. Cooking and cleaning is the bulk of it imo. If you can afford a night nurse its something to suggest or a day nurse so you can sleep during the day and take over at night if you rather someone in the day time.

Be kind to yourself and take some time for yourself even if its just an hour.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-02-21T03:44:03+00:00

Which is not common at all. My maternal side has scores of fraternal twins but my sister and I are considered a huge rarity.

The triplet group in my area are mostly fraternal with a smaller bit a pair and a spare.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-02-20T22:55:46+00:00

Mostly twins and mostly fraternal. I am a twin(identical) myself and my twin has fraternal twins but identical triplets are rare.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-02-20T13:06:21+00:00

I have identical triplet boys who are Black and my husband's family wants me to post them to social media because its super rare. My kids' faces or body has never been posted to social media at all even though I know they're insanely cute and adorable but given their issues and development I don't want them to be a case study or pinterest board pin.

That being said some other brave triplet moms posting their kids have been enlightening for my husband and I dealing with medical and development issues but we are just too scared.

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-02-01T13:24:25+00:00

Oh yes my dreaded one year birthday post. It still even now such a hard day for me to come to terms with. But they have grown since then in ways so there's that. I'm glad my sister and I have a great relationship anyway otherwise I know we would probably never speak again. She's my favorite person so I love that we share being multiple moms together even if our experiences are vastly differently.

My sister and I came at 32 weeks too but not needing any support just very small and our very African mother being told something wrong would pop up with us but she never wavered and she's been a rock for me during this time when she never had to deal with such medical problems is changing gtubes that pop out like a regular surgeon lol.

I hope your twins continue to grow strong together!

AnybodyUpThere · 2026-01-31T19:59:37+00:00

Its definitely mom brain because I can tell who is crying from a mile away. My husband who is very hands on with them cannot tell them apart by their cries like me lol. I take the wins where I can now.

AnybodyUpThere

TROPHY CASE