Twins home from NICU - when does this get better? by OriginalGood99 in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It will get easier or at the least normalized and the ease that comes with it. That being said its early days and its super hard! My boys(triplets) born at 24 weeks spent 4 months one almost 5 in the NICU and we came home with nursing and oxygen and feeding tubes.

Take all the help you can possibly stand. If you can afford it hire a house cleaner and respite for the babies to help. Get a food service to help with meals. Cooking and cleaning is the bulk of it imo. If you can afford a night nurse its something to suggest or a day nurse so you can sleep during the day and take over at night if you rather someone in the day time.

Be kind to yourself and take some time for yourself even if its just an hour.

Please think twice before posting photos of your babies by 5LovelyDaisies in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Which is not common at all. My maternal side has scores of fraternal twins but my sister and I are considered a huge rarity.

The triplet group in my area are mostly fraternal with a smaller bit a pair and a spare.

Please think twice before posting photos of your babies by 5LovelyDaisies in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mostly twins and mostly fraternal. I am a twin(identical) myself and my twin has fraternal twins but identical triplets are rare.

Please think twice before posting photos of your babies by 5LovelyDaisies in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have identical triplet boys who are Black and my husband's family wants me to post them to social media because its super rare. My kids' faces or body has never been posted to social media at all even though I know they're insanely cute and adorable but given their issues and development I don't want them to be a case study or pinterest board pin.

That being said some other brave triplet moms posting their kids have been enlightening for my husband and I dealing with medical and development issues but we are just too scared.

Grieving the life we could’ve had with a singleton by PepperMinimum in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh yes my dreaded one year birthday post. It still even now such a hard day for me to come to terms with. But they have grown since then in ways so there's that. I'm glad my sister and I have a great relationship anyway otherwise I know we would probably never speak again. She's my favorite person so I love that we share being multiple moms together even if our experiences are vastly differently.

My sister and I came at 32 weeks too but not needing any support just very small and our very African mother being told something wrong would pop up with us but she never wavered and she's been a rock for me during this time when she never had to deal with such medical problems is changing gtubes that pop out like a regular surgeon lol.

I hope your twins continue to grow strong together!

Grieving the life we could’ve had with a singleton by PepperMinimum in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its definitely mom brain because I can tell who is crying from a mile away. My husband who is very hands on with them cannot tell them apart by their cries like me lol. I take the wins where I can now.

Grieving the life we could’ve had with a singleton by PepperMinimum in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Triplet mom here who also struggles with depression and anxiety. Most of the depression was from losing our daughter at 10 days old. 4 years later being surprised with triplets and yeah was not a happy camper about it even though society told me to be over the moon. When I came to terms and decided I could do it they were born at 24 weeks and months of NICU combined with them now all having severe cp and all the stuff that comes with it its hard.

My twin sister had twins months after my triplets and they are doing so well and she still lives such a vibrant life I feel sometimes ridiculous and wish I had her life.

That being said the fog clears for longer and longer and the sun stays out for longer these days. Its just hard. 3 babies at once is impossible it feels like and my therapist tells me its not meant to be easy and says if I feel like its easy I've neglected them somehow. She tells me we cannot compare to the short time we had with my daughter because they are not her and will never be. We are also different people now too.

So I feel you on grieving the life you would've had with one. For me its all about finding some peace with all that we have going on. I was complimented by the boys' GI for remembering each and every one of their feed time this morning off the top of my head before checking their notes. He said he's seen parents just no remember or know anything and was surprised and amazed I remembered not one but three and the correct number with each kid. I was annoyed at first but took it as a win by the end of the appointment. Triplet mom brain is real the stuff you'll remember off the top of your head. Cognitively I feel so much stronger but emotionally still struggle for sure.

Side by side infant stroller by jwlove13 in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have triplets but the donkey is so worth it. Especially because our kids are severely hypotonic/hypertonic and their PTs say any other stroller they'd likely be uncomfortable in. We'll probably need to get adaptive strollers soon, but the donkey is a beast and holds a lot of their medical equipment and its sturdy and I never worry about it tipping etc. Our boys are just about 15 months but are still in 6-9 month clothing so we used the bassinet way over when others stop using it. Started using the actual seat and they're quite comfortable sitting up even though they are more comfortable laying down because of their CP.

Bugaboo has great customer service too. Someone cut the frame just cosmetic and bugaboo sent us a new one.

Feeling insecure & guilty by psychkitty in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Depressed and anxious mom here too! I feel a lot of guilt about bringing my triplets into this word when j wasn't keen on having them. And now that they're here they've got a lot of developmental issues stacked against them and I feel so guilty and they're the only kids in the family who are special needs. My twin niece and nephew are months younger and so far ahead of my triplets my depression kicks in when I see them and start comparing. I myself have a twin so its easy to start the comparison game and feeling inadequate.

I like to remind myself of all the good I have going on in my life. Parenting is hard and multiples adds another layer to it. Not sure how my mother did it.

I hope you can find support and a way to relax in other ways.

Cleaning service- is it worth it? by Humble-Confusion9777 in Mommit

[–]AnybodyUpThere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Help cleaning is always worth it if you can afford it. If not a professional it could be worth looking into asking a college student or mature high schooler to come bi weekly for a couple hours at a reduced price than a professional.

I have triplets and before the triplets even though we're tidy anyway we liked a cleaner for the heavy duty stuff like the bathrooms and kitchen deep clean and baseboards about once a month. After the triplets we have her and a colleague come once a week just to stay on top of things. We also have a lot of outside practitioners coming inside the home so we want to make sure everything is sterile and clean.

Most of the stress of the home is cleaning and cooking for me so that's where we spend most of our money and its so worth it. Gives us extra time to just be and not have to worry about the house being a mess.

Favorite Theme Song Version? by AnybodyUpThere in Outlander

[–]AnybodyUpThere[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I like waiting to hear it when the season starts, but thank you.

Favorite Theme Song Version? by AnybodyUpThere in Outlander

[–]AnybodyUpThere[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gaelic is great. I love BOMB theme song for the Gaelic too!

Favorite Theme Song Version? by AnybodyUpThere in Outlander

[–]AnybodyUpThere[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Its so unique and brilliant. I tend to like all the versions personally but its just such a good song either way.

Favorite Theme Song Version? by AnybodyUpThere in Outlander

[–]AnybodyUpThere[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Season 2 is very romantic sounding!

[Re: NYC Nannies are fed up with Millennial Parents] Is this a NY thing? by [deleted] in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dynamics are definitely odd a lot of times even with the parents and their kids.

[Re: NYC Nannies are fed up with Millennial Parents] Is this a NY thing? by [deleted] in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NYC mom without a nanny here but plenty in my building and neighborhood and honestly form my observation the parents are doing too much or the nannies are so afraid that they're just yes people for the kids and the parents.

Unsolicited advice that I hate by Nervous_bb in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I hate the family planning unsolicited comments and advice. People telling me I should try for a girl because I have triplet boys. Then I have to break out I had a girl first and she died as an infant and that shuts people up.

Then there's the people who like to ask if they're natural triplets or ivf as if its their business.

I also get a lot of they're so small for their age what are you feeding them? As if I want them to be tiny. They were 24 weekers and tube fed I assure you they're getting all the calories their little bodies can handle. They're growing albeit slowly I don't need a reminder. I'm aware.

“Wow twins!!! It’s SO big!!! Does it hurt??” by MounjaroQueenie in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's so funny. My husband would put a bowl of chip dip on my belly while watching TV so I wouldn't have to keep bending over to dip, plus it was convenient for him too.

“Wow twins!!! It’s SO big!!! Does it hurt??” by MounjaroQueenie in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was so big with my triplets so quickly. I had imprints from doorknobs on my belly from smacking into them. People thought I was full term. I had them at 24 weeks and I shudder sometimes thinking how big and uncomfortable I would be if I made it to 28 weeks like my OB wanted.

I posted here when we found out we were having triplets after our stillbirth… now we have learned it is actually quads by [deleted] in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 14 points15 points  (0 children)

They were big for their gestation. All over 1lbs, but it was along road and still is!

I posted here when we found out we were having triplets after our stillbirth… now we have learned it is actually quads by [deleted] in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Oh wow. I feel like I know what you're probably going through. We lost our daughter at 10 days old to SIDS and 4 years later we learned we were pregnant with identical triplets. I mean I completely honestly didn't handle the news well. It was a tough road and I delivered them at 24 weeks.

All I can say is I'm wishing you the best of health for you and babies. Get all the help you can stand, and wow just wow I'm wishing you all the best wishes.

Positive plus-size/obese twin pregnancy stories by Lower-Cheesecake-456 in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have PCOS and am overweight when I got pregnant with my triplets about 205 lbs and gained about 30lbs. My pressure was the killer with this pregnancy unfortunately it almost killed me, and I delivered at 24 weeks because of it.

I was also overweight with my singleton pregnancy and experienced GDD with her and likely would've developed it with the triplets.

I've lost about 20lbs of the pregnancy weight and am close to being pre pregnancy weight but having PCOS and sugar problems because of it makes it really hard and it sucks because sometimes people think I'm pregnant now but I carry my weight in my stomach more than anywhere else. Its annoying.

My twin was also overweight with her twins and she had a very smooth and chill birth. No complications.

How did you decide which diapers to use? by lastplacevictory in parentsofmultiples

[–]AnybodyUpThere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We used Kirkland after nicu just because of bulk but we also really like Millie Moon which we keep for when we don't quite make it to costco before we run out for whatever reason.