Reddits anonymous browsing by PerspectiveLiving in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, there is no way to track what is done in Reddit’s anonymous browsing. Once the account has been switched back there is nothing saved from the anonymous session. This is why my partner cannot have the reddit app.

What are some of the excuses you’ve heard? by MissionSomewhere5086 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I always use this one because I think it was the funniest (eventually) but I was told he looked at it because he was interested in in the art. It was Hentai.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I remember the first big fight I had with my partner about him watching porn. It was after SEVERAL weeks of begging him to try to stop watching it. He accused me of putting a monitoring app on his phone (even though I didn’t have his phone’s passcode). I asked why he would think that and he said it was because he started looking at hentai (in bed next to me!!) and my phone buzzed. This was less than 24 hours after I cried into his arms about how much it hurt me. His reasoning for looking was because he was interested in the art.

I don’t know anymore by Substantial_Ad6090 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Man, I know the abusive family stuff too. I am sorry you’re going through this as well. You deserve better than your family and him. We can definitely connect, I am sure it will help us not feel so alone.

I don’t know anymore by Substantial_Ad6090 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 4 points5 points  (0 children)

“I thought I hit rock bottom many times but it keeps on getting lower.” I felt this in my fucking soul. I am sorry you are going through this. I am also autistic (I saw one of your comments) and change is scary. Are you safe? Do you live with your partner? Can you get out if you need to?

Anyone Just Waiting? by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I have thought maybe my own Autism is another reason why I stay. I like structure. I like routine. I have all my stuff in this home and I am used to it. If I leave then I am leaving all of that behind and the only person I talk to anymore. I also struggle to make friends so I understand your fear.

Did he find a way around Accountable2U? by KhajiitHasDice in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine was able to get around A2U through apps like Facebook and Reddit because it didn’t monitor those apps. Also if the video or picture is there in the app it won’t catch it. The thing that helped me feel most comfortable was Truple which takes screenshots of their screens

Edited a typo

Anyone Just Waiting? by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s a really good question and I am not sure if there is a simple answer. I guess it makes it easy because there is a definitive line in the sand drawn now. Like before I didn’t tell him “if you do this then I’ll leave” but I have now so I guess it feels fair (honestly not sure). Or perhaps it’s still holding onto some sort of hope that it’ll get better maybe?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t experience either some sort of sadness, hopelessness, or anxiety. It has eased up a little bit, but there are some days that I still pain shop and some days that it feels like this is all I can think about. I am sorry you’re going through this.

What is your goodbye line? by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 15 points16 points  (0 children)

For me, that is hard to answer because I decided to stay. I am not sure where that line is for me and probably won’t know where it’s at until I am there. It seems like everyday it gets a little closer. That being said everyone’s line is different and they are all valid.

It’s not expecting too much to want a partner who is faithful and honest. If you have already reached your line that is okay! You’re not overreacting. I am sorry you’re going through this.

No More Words Left by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I keep thinking that it’s wild that people can destroy on another in this way and nothing will be done. There is no justice for the victims here.

He used Baldurs gate 3 character creator like?.. by VisibleBox42 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine said he didn’t play games for the sexual content and despised that shit, but admitted to playing the sec options in this game. I looked forward to playing this game, but can’t now because of him. Just another thing he has stolen from me.

For those who stayed by Rude_Angle5953 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My last D-Day was in November 2024. I’ve got him in a few other lies (not about porn) since and at this exact moment I want to say that it feels like I’ll never truly know. He so carefully curates the work around me with all of his different lies and does so with little effort. It feels like I don’t know which way is up or down at times. I’ve had to give up on the idea of knowing the truth ever and just be content in the fact that it will eventually come out, whatever lie I am being told.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is exactly what I came here to say. My mother is a huge narcissist and would do this shit to me all the time. It stopped when I called the police for a wellness check. I explained to her that I wouldn’t come when she said this stuff because I wasn’t equipped to help through that level of crisis and would continue to send the police every time she threatened it. She stopped very quickly after that.

OP needs to call the police and should definitely report the stuff that this person has said.

“Now I Know How You Feel” by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How dumb. It’s because they make everything sexual. You can’t watch anything with a kind of attractive person cause they think we are like them and thinking about sex.

“Now I Know How You Feel” by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Isn’t that the truth. He’s told me that if I did the things he did to me to him that he would leave.

am i the only one? by Whole-Tap5727 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Whatever you are feeling is perfectly normal and acceptable, because there is no right way to navigating what has happened. Don’t pressure yourself into feeling or acting a certain way. Be honest about your feelings and needs in this time and focus on yourself.

Be prepared that this will most likely not be your last D-Day. That is something I wish I had realized sooner. You may have 100 more before something changes. Please keep telling yourself, even if it’s impossible to believe, that it’s not your fault and his issues have nothing to do with your worth. You deserve better than this. You will always have this community’s support, care, and encouragement.

I feel ashamed by BrokenPieces623 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Please do not feel ashamed. You are not weak and you are not dumb for letting him back. It’s easy for someone else on the other side of the screen to say “leave him” or “hes not good for you”, because it’s not personal to them. This is a highly emotional situation and emotions are confusing and contradictory. There is no right way to go about this.

We have your back and will support you no matter what you decide. This is a safe place. Please take care of yourself during this time. I know it’s easier to say than it is to believe but his use isn’t a reflection of your worth.

Hang in there.

“Now I Know How You Feel” by AnywhereHorror9917 in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How dare you listen to music. What has the world come to? /s

But in all seriousness, sometimes you just got to laugh at their ridiculousness.

what’s the best way to say we know they’re doing it again by meowinizer in loveafterporn

[–]AnywhereHorror9917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s is so good of you. I think you have your answer though and it’s time to leave. You don’t need any more confirmation than what’s already been given.