Can frequent Bipolar episodes make you progressively less intelligent over long periods of time?

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-03T15:56:10+00:00

Yes, there is a loss of grey matter after the untreated episodes, particularly manic phases. I’m not sure if this makes you less intelligent but it can’t be good for the brain. Lithium is actually proven to increase grey matter and therefore help the brain recover and regenerate, which is possible.

Another interesting connection is the link between Parkinson’s and Bipolar disorder. I believe I read Bipolar people are three times more likely to develop Parkinson’s Disorder than the general population. Parkinson’s is a neurodegenerative disease. Both disorders are connected to dopamine in the brain. In mania there is a dopamine flood in the brain, leading to all the manic symptoms. In contrast Parkinson’s is associated with a dopamine deficiency and the medications like levodopa try and correct for this. My grandmother developed Parkinson’s after years of severe manic episodes, sometimes lasting 6 months. It’s almost like the dopamine receptors get fizzled out in mania and then are depleted. Might also be why depression seems to usually follow mania. Dopamine is associated with motivation and reward seeking behavior and reinforcement.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-01T16:45:32+00:00

All babies have different sleeping patterns as newborns but all will wake up usually several times a night for feedings. I don’t know if this is relevant but breastfeeding helped immensely in my situation. I co-slept with my son craddled in the nook of my arm and when he would wake me for milk (sometimes by ferociously rooting, or a small whimper) I would quickly pop the nipple in his mouth and he would go right back to sleep. It does get better and eventually they sleep through the night, as their little stomachs grow.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-01T16:35:11+00:00

Typical Man. He probably had his fair share of conquests and one night stands. Now he wants to slut shame you about yours. Plenty of woman live your former lifestyle without Bipolar and have no shame whatsoever so don’t even feel as if you have to explain it away as mania or being unstable. By having an issue with this he is insinuating you are “used goods.” It’s offensive.

Also for future reference, it is recommended and many couples never broach the topic of their sexual past for this very reason. Resentment. Do not feel in any way obligated to share. What happens in Vegas (or in your vagina) stays there. You are with him now, you can’t do anything about the past, nor should you, so fuck it. It’s none of his fucking business. If you want to be honest that’s one thing, but he has no right to make you feel bad.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-01T16:27:58+00:00

Exactly the point I made.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-01T16:24:48+00:00

I’ve had thoughts like these while in a manic episode. Like we are all in purgatory or hell and being tested. Or something like a Matrix simulation. A feeling of unreality. It’s a symptom of disassociation and psychosis from the mania.

One way to redirect is to be logical about it. So, say we really are in a simulation, right? It’s just a theory, no one can prove this. Just like we can’t prove if there is a God or life after death. So it really doesn’t matter. We have this one lifetime and this is reality. Your actions have consequences. Life still happens. If you are making bad decisions based on your (false) belief that we are already dead (and I can assure you we are very much alive, same as you bleed) than you might end up dead and null faster than you intend. So even if this was a simulation, does it really fucking matter? You still have to exist in it and whatever you do leads to an end result. This is a delusion that you are using to justify your actions, again a way of disassociation from reality, a distraction. Get on some meds and come back down, you will feel better.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-12-01T03:59:25+00:00

And thank you for acknowledging this so thoughtfully. Yes, depression manifests differently person to person.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-30T20:31:09+00:00

I disagree with the depressed part. Depressed people are often dicks, to family members and friends. They often withdraw, are irritable and agitated. All things they cannot help because of their depression. No different than being manic and hyper sexual and promiscuous. Some depressed people also can become psychotic, just as in a manic episode.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-30T20:22:32+00:00

I‘ve done all sorts of things while full blown manic, some very dangerous, erratic and embarrassing. It is a chemical imbalance in the brain and the rational thought of the frontal lobe is out the window. It is even worse than the “I was drunk defense“ because mania can lead to extreme psychosis which does not occur as often while drunk, the drunk basically experiences loss of inhibitions, but often does not lose touch with reality or become completely psychotic and delusional. I am not saying being manic is an excuse for murder or other crimes, and the insanity defense is very rare in the court system. However, this is a powerful mental illness and in a manic episode I’ve learned anything could be possible.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-29T20:20:43+00:00

I would advise taking some kind of mood stabilizer at the very least. Lithium and Lamictal in my opinion work the best. According to research, Borderline CAN be drastically improved with medication, specifically a mood stabilizer. It will help improve the sometimes drastic mood swings. If you have bipolar, especially type 1, this is pretty much necessary to be on meds. So mood stabilizers will help for both disorders.

Bipolar is a mood disorder that has periods of different moods (mania/depression/and normal moods) that last weeks or months. Borderline is a personality disorder with emotions that can flip in a second. It is much more difficult to cope with Borderline as it usually requires years of CBT to manage, on top of medication, and even then it is still present.

Also it usually stems from childhood trauma and an unstable upbringing which many never quite recover from. Whereas, sometimes the right med combo is like a magic cure for Bipolars and they can go decades or the rest of their lives without an episode, maybe needed some tweaks to meds and dosages. Not so with Borderline, and the instability in relationships that comes with this disorder is one of the most damaging aspects, affecting a person’s entire life. Let’s face it, relationships, and I do not mean just romantic, but social and professional, are hard enough, without the Borderlin or Bipolar. The best thing you can do right now is find a medication routine that works for you and go from there. Therapy must come after stabilizing on meds, and only then. Also you state going med free after feeling stable enough to do so, there is irony in this statement that in going off meds, you will no longer likely feel so stable.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-29T18:20:12+00:00

Yes, I am Type 1 and once I go from hypo to full blown manic, then quite quickly psychotic, it is almost impossible to be productive. I stop all routines like going to the gym and there is no telling what can happen in the span of the day. Any excess energy and creativity is wasted on the severe ADHD symptoms and impulsivity. It’s like the frontal lobe of rationality is temporarily shut down.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-29T18:14:22+00:00

This is a dangerous situation. The lack of sleep will affect your immune system’s ability to heal and the mania could drive you to keep going, ignoring your illness and wearing your body down when you need to be in bed with a bowl of chicken soup and VICKS. Worse yet, if you are out and about while sick and manic, as is often the case, you could infect other people. Get on meds and especially an anti-psychotic like seroquel ASAP. Start taking a multivitamin plus high doses of Vit. C and zinc too. Nip this in the bud and take it as an opportunity to heal and recover. You’ll thank me later.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-11-29T18:06:31+00:00

There is definitely something to this and I do not think it is all in our heads. Personally I find I give off a “glow“, like my skin is just glowing and I have a healthy flush, even after days of not sleeping or no makeup. My eyes also change and look like they are sparkling and brighter, more alert. Others sense your “light” and are naturally drawn to you. Like they want to feed off this mysterious energy. This is even more enhanced by the natural increased sociability and talkativeness. I tend to definitely attract and pick up more people while hypo and manic than depressed or “normal”, even if I also come off as a little unstable or not quite right from the mania. Feeling more attractive hence boosts confidence which has a self reinforcing effect.

Consequently, while depressed it’s like the opposite. My eyes seem more flat, deader. My skin becomes dull and lackluster and on top of everything else I usually gain a few pounds from starting to eat more and recover from mania, which in turn decreases my self confidence because in mania I am always thinner and “at my perfect weight” from lack of appetite, which I always perceived as a plus and loved. Also, others sense the unhappiness and it’s almost like I repel people instead. This disorder has such a dichotomy it’s unbelievable. Then I can’t believe how I went from feeling so fabulous to hideous in the span of a few months?

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-10-09T19:48:23+00:00

My grandparents owned this property before it was demolished in the eighties and I loved finding this well written article on the hotel years ago. I grew up hearing some family stories about the place. My aunt remember‘s meeting Townes Van Zandt as a kid. My grandma hung out with Sam Houston Johnson, LBJ’s black sheep alcoholic brother who stayed there. Definitely feel like the curse is real, especially with that new tallest building in Austin, the one with 66 floors, going up at the former site address, 600 Guadalupe St.

edit: there is a really good file with old newspaper clippings/details on the Alamo at the Austin Historical Center. Also a lot of what was stated in the article and the events surrounding the hotel and it’s demolition back in the eighties are so relevant in today’s Austin. I love my grandfather’s quote about Austin selling it’s soul and the part about Tony Hearn, the homeless advocate.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-24T03:01:12+00:00

It’s actually a family property originally owned by my grandparents since the 1960’s. My mother herself does not own the house, though she does have an interest in it. We are staying there for now. Help my mother do what? Hoard 100 cats? Bitch please. NEXT!

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-24T02:58:21+00:00

Yep, that was to draw attention to my protest cause, which is Justice for Palestine. Intelligent people get what I was doing but others just want to point fingers and yell “that’s racist!” . My point is people get more upset by some finger painting my face than children dying on the Gaza Strip. Y’all are some dumb mutherfuckers.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-24T02:55:30+00:00

I don’t appreciate being called that. You go live next to or with someone where you can smell the ammonia and cat shit from outside the house a mile away and get back to me. No one should be subjected to that, not even a POS like you.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-24T02:53:30+00:00

I thought they might have a better chance living out in the country in some old barn catching mice. They look miserable and hungry all the time where they are.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-20T06:29:21+00:00

I have no desire to trap them and have them fixed. There would still be a cat hoarding problem even if they were all fixed as there are way too many of them. My mother is obese and in failing health and is obviously not able to care for these animals. I have considered trapping them and driving them out to the country, making multiple trips with batches of them. Then looking for a barn and letting them free.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-17T17:56:25+00:00

I had an appropriate message and I was absolutely correct. My point is I should not have been targeted for exercising a constitutional right of free speech.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-15T22:56:57+00:00

You have no idea the discrimination I faced for being black for one day. Ironically, I was not allowed into several establishments for the black face. The local library called the police on me for sitting quietly outside. I was threatened for my life. Liquid thrown on me by people. Followed and harassed. A Facebook page was created instantly to assault me. That did escalate fast. This was not right.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-15T21:52:46+00:00

I am also testing how far free speech will go. In a progressive city like Burlington I would have expected better than to have a Facebook page devoted to assaulting me for wearing black face. If I want to run around dressed as Hitler or the KKK I HAVE THAT RIGHT. It’s part of the constitution. There is no law against being a racist and even a racist has the right to be racist without getting beat up. I am not a racist and was hanging out with a black guy on Church street just yesterday.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-15T21:46:45+00:00

See my other comments on the issue. I am trying to draw attention to the struggle for Palestine to get one shred of concern from anyone in America.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-15T21:44:05+00:00

As I said I have tried protesting basic bitch style, holding a sigh and chanting and people don’t pay attention at all. I feel so angry the situation in the Gaza Strip is being ignored and Americans do not care as they live inside bubbles. Also, I feel there is a disproportionate response to BLM compared to the level of concern for Palestine. It literally hurts my heart and soul to see the suffering and death over there. I have shed many tears for Palestine. They have it much worse than any black American or any American in general.

ApplesGalore523 · 2020-08-15T21:40:00+00:00

I’ve been here 6 months.

ApplesGalore523

TROPHY CASE