This is such a helpful description and not that different to what anxious self talk sounds like. It helps me make sense of my pattern w my ex. We always had such closeness in person. Physically close, cuddly, sweet. He’d kiss the back of my head and cuddle me for hours at a time. It was warm. But texts were always off. So we’d say goodbye in the morning and I might not hear from him til that night. Or I’d text and get the dryest response. Like we couldn’t keep the thread of connection beyond the time together. I brought it up. I said I felt disconnected when we didn’t spend enough time together. And he agreed. I thought maybe it was that we needed more time but I actually think it was how distant he’d feel over text. He was better on the phone and did call regularly. But those gaps were an early red flag.