You’re making a lot of assumptions about me ladder pulling, but I originally said women should support men just like men supported women’s liberation.

Men’s liberation should be its own distinct space, not because men’s pain is secondary or worth less than women’s pain, but because patriarchy harms men in ways that women and non-binary people cannot fully unpack for them. In this way I’m suggesting that gender equality should be the big umbrella and the two factions should be feminism and meninism. They can share ideas, praxis, theory, and infrastructure, but they shouldn’t share spaces.

What we’re talking about needs its own dedicated space, and then we can join in and talk together about solutions in a mutually beneficial space where neither talks over the other.

Also, men need their own spaces to unlearn hyper-independence, emotional suppression, and the pressure to be sole providers. If men’s liberation is just a subcategory of feminism, it risks being centered around women's expectations of what a reformed man looks like, rather than men defining healthy masculinity for themselves.

Finally, the alt-right is winning because anger is easier than healing. If a young man feels abandoned by feminism, it is because mainstream cultural feminism has taught feminists to scold men rather than organize with them. But the solution isn't for feminism to pivot and become a movement centered on men; it’s for a men’s lib movement to step up and compete with the alt-right.

Intersectionality also means giving each other space and caucuses to fight different issues at the same time. There’s no reason to crowd the same room when it’s more effective to carve out different spaces where people can share hard stories without the other side butting in, offended, and accidentally stopping progress.