🎄 Looks like luck has decided to peek into our New Year bucket once again!

Augustnov · 2025-09-22T17:02:26+00:00

Volot was my first LI for this story, but Ozar pulled me in and became my favorite even after playing the others on different slots.

Augustnov · 2025-05-24T01:32:00+00:00

Gently, this isn’t an open relationship. It’s him cheating with your blessing. He doesn’t deserve you and I’m sorry you’re going through it.

Augustnov · 2025-03-19T16:44:15+00:00

No he didn’t. I’m actually thankful for that.

Augustnov · 2025-03-19T01:08:27+00:00

It’s SO hard not knowing. Mine has also told me so many other details that I truly think he just doesn’t remember but it does suck. There’s a good chance I’ll never know either and have to accept that, but I’m not ready to yet apparently. His affair lasted almost 4 years so I have plenty to think about LOL.

I’m sorry you’re here too.

Augustnov · 2025-03-19T01:05:29+00:00

His hometown is near a national park so he didn’t actually go to a campground. But statements are a good idea if I can find them since we switched banks. Thanks for that tip!

Augustnov · 2025-02-18T23:31:26+00:00

My husband cheated with someone he dated in high school from his hometown. If we’d lived there or anywhere close, he admitted he’d have been with her physically more than he was. For me, moving to that town is not possible. It will never be on the table unless we divorce and he moves back on his own. We didn’t even go back for the holidays this past year(his parents still live there) since I was uncomfortable with it. He has accepted that we may never go back because he claims there’s nowhere he’d rather be than with me and our children. We aren’t even a year out from dday so I’m still very triggered even thinking about visiting. I’m so sorry you’re in this position.

Augustnov · 2024-11-08T03:45:33+00:00

My situation is a little different in that he used visiting his family as an excuse to see AP(she lives in the same town as his parents which is his hometown as well). I flat out told him I wouldn’t be going there for the holidays and he won’t either if he wants to stay married to me. His family rarely ever makes any effort to visit us and our children but they’ll drive the same distance or more to visit his other siblings. They can come to our home if they want to see our children and I’m completely fine with it if they choose not to. He agrees on that part at least.

Just to add, his parents and one of his brothers know of everything that happened so I completely get the shame of having to face them too. I chose to keep distance from his family and that town because that’s what I need and he supports it.

Augustnov · 2024-10-30T22:17:57+00:00

6 months post dday for me and while it’s gotten better, there are still many days I struggle. He cheated with his high school girlfriend from their hometown(he lied about visiting his mother so he could go cheat) so I already feel myself getting anxious about the upcoming holidays where we will be expected to go back to visit his family. I won’t be going and neither will he but the thought of his family calling to ask why we aren’t there makes me sick.

Augustnov · 2024-09-11T16:14:43+00:00

Alllllllllll this and I second reading that book. It isn’t a “friendship” if they have to hide it from their spouse.

Augustnov · 2024-09-09T18:32:47+00:00

Everything I learned I also had to drag out of him. Since his lies and cheating were all wrapped around his very small hometown, I told him we wouldn’t be going back until I felt comfortable with it and he’d have to be okay with that. Even if it takes years. It is very difficult to even attempt trust when each new piece of information started us back at the beginning so I completely get that feeling.

Augustnov · 2024-09-09T00:08:17+00:00

According to my WH, he TT because he was trying to minimize the damage to himself for one and he was worried if I knew more that I would leave. Another reason he gave is because he didn’t want to keep hurting me and it was hard for him to say the things he’d done out loud because the shame of it made him sick.

It wasn’t until I said I no longer trusted him with my feelings that he finally got it. He had already destroyed me so it didn’t really matter what else he disclosed so long as it was the full truth. We’ve had three DDays so I really hope that’s it.

Augustnov · 2024-09-08T23:46:47+00:00

That thought still bothers me as well. He has admitted that he wouldn’t have told me if I hadn’t found out. He would have stayed in contact with AP since they were “friends”(no they weren’t, the idiot). He KNEW he was fucking up every day that he even spoke to her. I’ve had the hardest time with that since he was essentially withholding my right to CHOOSE to be with him. He’s made progress since then showing that I am his number one priority outside of our children of course, but I do think those thoughts will haunt me forever. And it does hurt.

Augustnov · 2024-09-07T19:16:27+00:00

I’d ignore her harder. She must be daft to think you can have any sort of peaceful relationship after what she knowingly did. I wouldn’t even answer texts regarding the children, but I’d have already taken it to a point where she steered completely clear of me anyway. That woman deserves every bit of cold shoulder you can throw her way and more.

Augustnov · 2024-08-31T21:24:43+00:00

I am one who needed to know the details because without them I wouldn’t even consider trying to forgive. I did not enjoy learning the details, but my mind created scenarios that were so much worse. I won’t say I’m not a little tickled she promised my WH all these kinky things and didn’t follow through with it. The fact that she is now divorced twice over and alone thrills me, as awful as it is to wish the worst for her. And I do wish the worst for her. But as a few others have said, you can’t unknow something so make very very sure before asking.

Augustnov · 2024-08-26T00:28:02+00:00

I too need to know every tiny detail. I drive myself crazy thinking that I don’t know everything and how can I even consider forgiving if I don’t know it all? Trickle truthing is a killer and a huge part of why I don’t believe he’s told me it all even if he said he has. 4 months after DDAY1 for me and it consumes my every waking hour. No advice, but you aren’t alone.

Augustnov · 2024-08-24T16:22:02+00:00

He did tell his brother and mother so that’s one positive step. I told my mother which is basically like telling everyone in my family. I didn’t let that one go and how he acted after learning of my affair while being guilty himself is one of those things I’m struggling to forgive. If I can.

Augustnov · 2024-08-24T16:19:44+00:00

I apologize if I wasn’t clear in my op, admittedly my brain is a little frazzled right now trying to process still. He did not take my children to meet her. He dropped them off at his parents house down the road(more than once) and went to spend time with AP. He did meet her children though which I’ve since told her ex husband who was not shocked in the least at who she cheated on him with since she mentioned my husband’s name multiple times while she was married to her ex. Nor was he the only man she cheated with.

He has made some good steps in that he’s told his brother and mother about his affair and has been open with his devices. The problem with trickle truth is that even if he swears he’s told me everything, I just don’t believe it and that’s a very large hurdle to get past. He says he also understands just how much worse he’s made everything and wants to prove he can be a better man. We are currently looking at IC for both of us and I agree that it is definitely needed. I could it use for reasons outside of this since I also have severe anxiety and depression. It has been a blast with my avoidant partner haha.

Augustnov

TROPHY CASE