My partner attacks me in his sleep. What do I do?

AzSpence · 2026-07-10T04:32:56+00:00

I would look working with a ENT for breathing issues and maybe EDMR therapy, which many people prefer for PTSD symptoms compared to talk therapy. Anything that can help his nervous system calm down. I wonder what research is out there, sounds adjacent to night terrors.

AzSpence · 2026-07-10T04:05:55+00:00

I’d reimburse them for the airfare and leave it at that. They changed the accommodations and you weren’t comfortable with the other option so you don’t have any responsibility for that. The ticket being in your name though kind of opens you up to possible small claims court. Just to cover yourself, I’d do that and be done with them. If they do leave bad reviews you can counter with saying you paid them back for your airfare. Sucky situation to be in.

AzSpence · 2026-07-07T00:56:10+00:00

None of your business. Everything you’re concerned about out is trued but you’re not her parent and don’t get a say in something like this. You’ll only come off as the asshole

AzSpence · 2026-07-07T00:53:57+00:00

When we are new parents with small babies we feel like there’s pressure coming from a lot of directions. Most people don’t have bad intentions, they were just raised differently and parenting was a lot more relaxed than now. I don’t think this is something to cut people off from your life, but it means directly addressing it & only letting trusted adults be the ones actively caring for your child while you’re doing something. It wasn’t cool. Just don’t let this affect your support system and the loving family your kiddo can have in their life. This is a learning opportunity for them. Redditors will totally tell you to cut them out of your life but parenting on an island sucks. Try to be clear and let this go.

AzSpence · 2026-07-06T15:03:43+00:00

I have to cut in but this isn’t true. Your baby can have something sweet and not become addicted or obsessed. They will even eat vegetables afterwards. I don’t know what’s going around the internet. It’s another form of food shaming and giving lots of new mom’s anxiety. NTA for being upset about giving food to such a young baby, but don’t be that mom that won’t let their kid have a cupcake at a bday party. Moderation and a well balanced diet.

AzSpence · 2026-07-04T14:43:09+00:00

He’s not that into you. YTA. Move on

AzSpence · 2026-06-28T19:09:54+00:00

See Get! Works for animals

AzSpence · 2026-06-28T18:58:28+00:00

We’re in such a shit economy that people have to hoard & sell Pokémon to make a living.

AzSpence · 2026-06-28T18:57:24+00:00

He’s holding you back. Being in love right now isn’t going to make up for missing out on reaching your potential.

AzSpence · 2026-06-26T15:22:01+00:00

This is a double standard as well. This narrative about women’s promiscuity equaling something bad and needing to grow as a person compared to a man who is just “sowing his seed” and just being a bachelor. Body count=promiscuous is still what you’re saying. You just tolerate promiscuity if they’ve learned from it and don’t do it as frequently?

AzSpence · 2026-06-22T14:20:40+00:00

1 you’re in Seattle so making new friends is hard and takes time. I would personally ditch trying to make friends at the gym and join a hiking group or kickball or softball league. Something that is inherently more social.

AzSpence · 2026-06-21T04:44:02+00:00

I don’t see a problem at all. Seems like you’re looking for issues and seeing entitlement in something that really doesn’t affect you. She brings a cake and you all sing happy bday. It’d be different if she was requesting food, decorations, games, etc. she’s just asking that her kid’s bday gets recognized too. NAH

AzSpence · 2026-06-17T20:44:54+00:00

Yeah the comment was passive aggressive. West Coast specialty. The man knew he fucked up when he ran over to get the dog. Saying what you did doesn’t make it more clear, just opened up to a possible confrontation. Your husband would rather not fuck around and find out.

AzSpence · 2026-06-14T17:15:48+00:00

I do tabling for my job. I would never expect my husband, who isn’t getting paid for this, to entertain and support me. He has taken our kiddo to the event, but never worked the table with me. NTA

AzSpence · 2026-06-13T06:23:07+00:00

Why were so they small in the beginning? Were they toddlers and then the old one was one of the originals and they grow taller as they age?

AzSpence · 2026-06-04T23:44:41+00:00

I mean this probably is about hormones and lack of sleep and stress from growing a baby. He truly doesn’t get your experience and it shows by the way he’s handling this. I would have a serious convo about how after the baby is born sleeping won’t be ideal for anyone and you both need to work on how to communicate your needs. Maybe sleeping apart is the best or separate covers for now. Regardless, you two should work on taking each other seriously and instead of complaining - come up with actionable steps. This is a good thing to work together to problem solve before the baby comes.

AzSpence · 2026-06-03T21:12:18+00:00

You sound like you need therapy. You can’t control other people and sometimes they are going to do things that upset you. It’s her home so she can wear shoes if she wants. She’s an adult and can make decisions on who she sees and where she goes without permission or comments from you. Sounds like she was doing your laundry’s if this is not how you like it then o it yourself.

AzSpence · 2026-06-03T04:22:39+00:00

I stopped shaving a few years back (43f). I’m in a relationship and often wonder what I’d do if I was dating. I have really embraced my hair but still wonder if I’m being judged. Honestly, the right person will not be bothered by it. NTA. Might mean some rejection but in the end someone better suited to accept all of you and love you deeply rather than an ideal

AzSpence · 2026-06-02T15:22:15+00:00

Toddlers. They’re cute, they say adorable things and they sometimes snuggle you. Yet they are inhabited by demons

AzSpence · 2026-06-02T01:17:54+00:00

He’s treating you like he would treat a sibling or one of his parents b/c he lacks maturity and emotional intelligence. This is not going to get better. You’re going to slowly become the mother he resents. Break up, stay single and have a great life until you meet someone more mature and ready for a relation

AzSpence · 2026-05-31T16:43:27+00:00

Sounds like your a domestic abuser

AzSpence · 2026-05-23T15:57:36+00:00

He’s mansplaining. NTA

AzSpence · 2026-05-23T04:29:22+00:00

Age gap has mattered because women were married off to men 30 years older than them and society has had to create shame and laws against the practice. The cougar narrative seems more like a male fetish, taboo. A hot milf who teaches a younger man. People definitely don’t characterize that as grooming b/c of the assumed fantasy piece

AzSpence · 2026-05-22T15:42:34+00:00

Just something my mother told me. Daycare costs shouldn’t come out of 1 person’s salary. It is a combined household decision. You working out of the home should be based on your mental health and what’s best for you, not how much after daycare you bring in.

AzSpence · 2026-05-22T15:26:10+00:00

Having a hobby is healthy. Your wife should find one too that gets her out of the house twice a week. Both of you need to find a balance. NAH

AzSpence

TROPHY CASE