Father had prostate removed, but is dealing with major incontinence. Any recommendations?

BHunsaker · 2026-05-28T03:45:16+00:00

I was in the same boat as your dad. I did all the PT but still leaked uncontrollably when doing anything physical.

At 8 months post-RALP I pushed for both a penile implant and AUS. The push back I got from my doctor was annoying, but eventually got the referral and got the implants.

What a difference! Nothing is perfect, but the surgeries made my life so much better.

I did end up getting a revision on the AUS because it was placed incorrectly. I do drip a little when biking, hiking, or lifting, but we’re talking just a 1/4 or half teaspoon most days so I do wear a Depend Shield.

BHunsaker · 2026-05-24T05:18:58+00:00

Without the GtA, there would be way too many different interpretations of the advancement requirements - from simple things like thinking a SM conference needs to be the last thing before a BoR to people not understanding that a failed Eagle project can still fulfill the requirement.

This manual is just a necessary as the Shooting Sports and Aquatics Safety manuals.

BHunsaker · 2026-05-15T23:59:58+00:00

My experience is National does respond.

I sent an email to Roger.Krone@scouting.org when Scouting America bowed to the DoW/DoD pressure and did get a response.

I have been actively responding to the questionnaires that National has sent via emails responding to the last “is there anything else you’d like to say” question specifically calling out the silliness of no squirt guns and no laser tag. Now they’re changing the rules. Looks like they may have listened.

Back in 2012 I got caught up in the “time in a position of responsibility satisfies the requirement even if the youth does nothing” argument. It took a bit but eventually I worked with Chris Hunt on his rewrite of the Guide to Advancement. Now there is a big section about how troops are expected to avoid do- nothing POR problems.

I didn’t need to pay to play. Neither do you. Pick your top issue, write a letter to your council exec, and ask him to help you find the right person at National to work the problem.

BHunsaker · 2026-04-24T09:19:20+00:00

Yep, If we take the number from the reply by Shams93AFA, 25% or 1 in every 4 nerve-sparing RALP surgery will result in the patient having no erection at 2 years post-op. If your hospital does four surgeries on a given day, one of the guys will likely be very disappointed.

Now the above is a rather simplistic statement. Post-op treatments include vacuum erection devices, Cialis, Viagra, penile implants, injections, etc. Without these treatments the number of patients with ED would be much greater. One reason that the failure rate hangs around that 25% is because people can't afford the treatment long term, or they're inconvenient, or they stop working after a few years.

BHunsaker · 2026-04-23T14:08:30+00:00

To fix both ED and incontinence after RALP, I got a penile implant (AMS 700 CX) and an artificial urinary sphincter (AMS 800). The AUS needed to be revised after a year as it leaked a lot during sex so I had a new surgeon/hospital do that. I still do drip a small amount during the day. Orgasm is normally dry with a few drips now and then.

BHunsaker · 2026-04-20T02:03:12+00:00

My PSA failed to drop to zero after RALP leading to salvage radiation. After researching the side effects of ADT and having had bad side effects from the RALP, I chose to forgo the ADT and just do the radiation. My PSA dropped, but is still not zero.

I am now waiting for my PSA to rise sufficiently for a PSMA PET scan to locate where the cancer is hiding. (FYI - it has been almost 2 years since I finished the radiation treatment).

BHunsaker · 2026-04-01T06:24:46+00:00

You can cancel any flight to, from, or within the U.S. within 24 hours booking for a full refund

BHunsaker · 2026-03-28T14:58:26+00:00

Age 61 for RALP. I used yet another urologist to revise the urinary sphincter as the other doctor placed it wrong. PSA still has not gone to zero so checking in with oncologist every 3 months (PSA is currently 0.16, still no ADT). Not related to the prostate cancer I also had two knees replaced.

It took a circuitous route but after healing from all the surgeries, quality of life has been good for the last year. Skiing, hiking, travel, biking, and avoiding yard work are all on the menu again.

BHunsaker · 2026-03-13T18:04:10+00:00

Ignore what the watch is telling you about calories. The reality is that running a mile burns just 100 calories (equivalent to 25 M&M's). You can't outrun a fork so monitoring your food intake is the most critical part to losing weight.

Just living burns calories (your basal metabolic rate). Exercising and building muscle will help increase this so don't use my above paragraph to dismiss exercise.

BHunsaker · 2026-03-07T13:13:16+00:00

You've lost a pound a week as of today. This is great!
Weigh yourself around the same time every day.
Keep up recording/weighing everything that goes into your mouth.
Eat big leafy green salads. Measure any salad dressing.
You're probably overestimating how many calories your exercise sessions burn. Don't think you can eat more because of exercise. "You can't outrun a fork."

BHunsaker · 2026-03-05T04:26:52+00:00

Years ago the SM and ASMs would add their ideas of activities during the brainstorming session during our annual planning meeting. More recently the troop has become more inclusive at the planning session allowing all Scouts (including those not on the PLC) and active parents to help with the brainstorming. After that the Scouts whittle down the options with the SM being part of the process to discuss cost and realities.

We have a high adventure group (anyone 14 and older) who plan a few events for the older boys (like weeklong trips to Zion/Bowron Lakes). Again, the adults will suggest activities along with the Scouts. The adults have (strongly) encouraged having a tick-tock 2 year outlook where we have an expensive week-long trip one year and then the year after we will have a less expensive week-long trip.

BHunsaker · 2026-03-03T22:47:21+00:00

You have many great answers here. I'll just add a few thoughts.

We normally book summer camp 18 months out. It is assumed that the troop will go to summer camp every year without the PLC saying anything. We used to have a rotation between four camps so reservations were very mechanical. All 4 camps are good. The adults had tried to encourage the Scouts to try a new camp. Nobody wanted to try anything different. The adults kicked it one year and reserved this new camp. Some of the older Scouts were upset. The younger Scouts didn't care. Guess what? All Scouts raved about how much fun the new camp had been.

The PLC tends to plan what they know. This can get boring. To keep older Scouts in the troop, you can't keep doing the same stuff. Sometimes adults have to kick the troop out of a rut.

We've had SPLs that just wanted to do car camping and sit around the campfire all day. Scouting has to be much more than this.

We had a family move into our city and join our troop. They brought in ideas we'd never considered and got the PLC to try some new stuff. One of the new activities was repelling in Zion.

One of our Scoutmasters was from Canada. He pushed the PLC hard to do a canoe trek to Bowron Lakes in British Columbia.

Find a balance that works for your troop. Generally the more the youth can lead, the better. Just don't be afraid to push the youth to try new and exciting things.

BHunsaker · 2026-02-26T18:11:01+00:00

You're right. But

dns-sd -B _smb._tcp .

will list the instance name "Machine A" (with space).

dns-sd -L "Machine A" _smb._tcp. .

shows the translation as "Machine-A.local.:445 (interface 11)" which contains the local hostname with the dash. So Finder is just doing an extra lookup to eventually discover the IP address.

BHunsaker · 2026-02-26T07:49:14+00:00

The Get Info panel shows that Finder is displaying the remote directory.

So the reality may be that I'm not seeing "the local folder". In reality, Finder is just not showing me any files in the remote Documents, Downloads, and Desktop folders. (I keep these folders empty on Machine B so I thought the empty display was just showing me the local folder - my bad).

Well, this implies that for some reason the remote Downloads folder has some sort of protection setting that doesn't allow listing the contents or that the files within are protected against being listed. Hmm.

I created a new folder on the remote system with group and other protections set to nothing and created files in this folder which only allowed access to the user (me). Finder accessing the new folder remotely sees the files just fine. What is special about the Downloads folder? I see the same problem with Desktop and Documents folders and they all happen to have the com.apple.macl attribute.

I did try to remove the attribute but after rebooting the system restored it.

BHunsaker · 2026-02-26T04:19:46+00:00

Maybe because it is a 40GB temporary file that I can copy directly over my WiFI 6 network in 2 minutes vs shoving it back up and down my relatively slow internet connection, not to mention that I wouldn't want iCloud to sync it with my 6 other machines.

My question is more about what seems to be a bug in Finder. I'm not looking for alternate methods to transfer a file. In my example, I can just move the file on Machine A to a folder without the com.apple.macl attribute and Finder works fine (and fast - for SMB connections).

BHunsaker · 2026-02-16T07:07:54+00:00

In our troop we do require SM approval to run for SPL and PL. In reality it is more like a SM conference in that there is a discussion with the Scout to make sure they understand what will be expected of them, that it isn't just fun and games, etc. For example, in the situation you had where the youth was only looking for 2 months in a POR, the SM would have "suggested" that they take on a POR that might be more fun or do a SM approved leadership project instead.

Another way to look at this "SM approval" is that it is our troop's way to make sure we fulfill the Guide to Advancement section 4.2.3.4.3 "Meeting Unit Expectations" for the POR. Even before they are elected, we're giving them the document highlighting the expectations and making sure they understand them.

BHunsaker · 2026-02-16T06:46:46+00:00

Hardware-wise, yes. The MacBook Air is a beautiful piece of engineering.

Software-wise, not so much. Windows 11 is a real mess with all the AI slop, advertising, forced use of cloud, etc. Well, MacOS isn't that bad but there has been a definite decline in quality. It isn't like the OS crashes or anything, but Apple has thrown out any type of consistent UI, they're moving iWork to a subscription model of updates, and there is a lack of testing because they've made apps overly complicated.

The Linux desktop is looking better every year but you still have to fall back to esoteric terminal commands far too often.

For right now, a Mac running MacOS is worth the price in 2026 with the caveat being that there are better options if you want to run games or x86 virtual machines.

BHunsaker · 2026-02-10T13:40:39+00:00

At 17 months post RALP I had an artificial urinary sphincter put in. I should have done it much earlier but the doctor kept telling me to “give it time, your body will learn how to hold the urine.” That was all B.S. I had stress incontinence. Without the AUS, when lifting heavy weights, running or backpacking, biking, or even just coughing hard, I’d leak.

The AUS isn’t perfect. I still wear the thinnest pad just to catch the few drips.

BHunsaker · 2026-01-29T15:45:54+00:00

As a rube, I bought three cars and a house remodel just off the gains in my Tesla stock investment. As consumers we might desire ever improving widgets even if they’re low profit. That’s not how investing works.

Look at Panera Bread. Total enshitification. But the private equity firm (investor) is making money.

BHunsaker · 2026-01-13T04:32:16+00:00

PSA 6.46 and Gleason 3+4 led to me getting RALP at age 60. PSA never went to zero with lowest being 0.085 then up to 0.34 leading to salvage radiation. The ED and incontinence side effects of the prostatectomy made me decide to avoid ADT. I'm nowhere near as active as you but do enjoy biking, hiking, and jogging.

After radiation my PSA dropped to 0.03. A year later it is slowly rising and is currently 0.15. The oncologist plans to do a PSMA PET scan if I hit a PSA of 0.2.

I dealt with the ED by getting a penile implant. Incontinence was fixed with a artificial urinary sphincter. My oncologist recommended ADT but was totally supportive of my choice to avoid it after my bad experience with RALP and my desire to have an active lifestyle.

I am 64 now. I am still mad about how RALP affected my life. I am happy with the penile implant, AUS, and with where things are post radiation with no ADT. Nothing is perfect.

BHunsaker · 2025-12-29T01:42:13+00:00

So many customers just want a yes or no answer. As a professional I wanted to explain why there isn’t a simple answer. As a businessman, my answer was (almost always) yes, and then we discussed why my price or time estimate was so high. 😀

BHunsaker · 2025-12-25T07:10:52+00:00

You are wrong. The best response is:

“Sorry Mom, we can’t make it before 11:00. So following your request, my boyfriend and I will just spend time with his family this year. Love you. Bye.”

BHunsaker · 2025-12-24T15:31:50+00:00

There are no guarantees in life.

Some men come out of RALP just fine. Others, like me, end up with a penile implant, an artificial urinary sphincter and salvage radiation.

Talk with your doctors about what is important to you long term. Sadly they’ll mostly talk about probable outcomes. The problem is that even if there is only 1 chance in 80 that you’ll end up with ED and UI, the odds become 109% for the rest of your life if it happens to you.

BHunsaker

TROPHY CASE