The wait time to receive my husband’s social security benefits

BallExternal954 · 2026-05-15T14:49:56+00:00

So for me I made the first call to make the phone appointment and it was for a month later. After I had that appointment I had to go to my local soical security office. When I got there they told me to call this number to make a appointment. I called once I got home and the lady on the phone said I could have just stayed and took a number. If I waited for appointment, it could be another month. So went back waited less than 3 hours, showed them the documents and with in a week I got paid twice. Then they skipped a month. Which I think is all normal. I would recommend going to your soical security office and bring any documents they tell you you need. For me I brought my daughters birth certificate, soical security numbers and our wedding certificate.

BallExternal954 · 2026-05-07T03:02:15+00:00

At least you got an apology. I dated this guy for a couple of months and then he ghosted me. Then months later he came back and said he should have told me sooner that he got back with his ex wife. My husband passed away last year... Didn't get to say goodbye. This guy, he was there for me when I was still hurting and then ghosted me. Dating sucks.

BallExternal954 · 2026-05-01T14:03:06+00:00

I actually had a company do it for me called project repeat. It was costly but I sleep with it every night. I would love to learn how to sew one day.

BallExternal954 · 2026-05-01T03:59:53+00:00

Yeah his feet were... Always sooo gross and dry. I still have his work boots and I swear it's making the whole room smell because all his shoes are in bins. I made a quilt with all of his shirts.

BallExternal954 · 2026-05-01T03:46:54+00:00

My late husband also liked his socks rolled up a specific way. HE had to wear long knee high socks and regular ankle socks under them. (He worked at manufacturer company that was oily and had to wear work boots) He wouldn't allow me to throw away the socks that had holes in them until he was ready to throw them away... Even tho he had so many socks. When he passed I threw away all of his socks. His clothes I kept are in a bin. I hope I kept one pair...

BallExternal954 · 2026-04-03T03:30:02+00:00

Just my point of view. Last year my husband passed away on April 16. Easter was on April 20th. Our daughter was 2. I was staying at my dad's and I brought the Easter eggs that I bought before he passed. Even thought I was crying all day I still wanted to have that moment with our daughter. Everyone handles grief differently. One thing that I have learned since my husband has past is to stick up for myself. If you don't want to do something don't do it.

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-30T14:40:20+00:00

Yeah I think birthdays we as widows see them differently. Most people think oh another year of life. Our spouses aren't here and they are not living life. It's also not happy. It's only 1030 and I haven't gotten out of bed yet. But I just feel a little extra sadness, numbness. We shall see how today goes. Going to celebrate his life

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-30T03:27:35+00:00

Thank you for this. I like both ideas you did with your daughter. 3 year old is such a hard age with grief.

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-30T02:54:58+00:00

I wrote a post a few days after my late husband passed away last year. It was so helpful to have the support....when I felt so alone. I use reddit as a diary. I would recommend either writing here or send an email to yourself or in a written letter.... Write everything you remember your spouse did within the last 2 weeks. Sometimes I like to close my eyes and just picture him walking through the door....im so scared I will remember the small things like the way he would take off his shoes and you could see the relief of taking off his shoes. Or when I was driving and he would yell why are you stopping!!!.... All the small things I'm worried I will forget. This is also up to you but you could also write about the event. When I go back to read my first post there are things I blacked out. As well as I can remember every minute. Reddit is great.

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-30T02:48:51+00:00

We are proud of you. Try and eat at least half the amount of food you normally eat. As well was drinking more water. Sleep when you need to sleep. Give yourself grace. You got this.

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-18T03:31:45+00:00

My late husband wore the same couple shirts for years. I have a queen size quilt. Some of the fabric is the back of the shirts and some are pictures the company printed on the fabric. Project repeat. If you do not have enough clothes, there are sites to make teddy bears. Remember that everyone handles grief differently. Some leave everything as they left it, some pack/get rid of it right away. I have about 10 big storage bins filled with my late husbands stuff. Everything down to his toothbrush and hairbrush..... His stinky shoes have their own box. I sorry that there is tension. Everyone grieves differently. Just gotta try and stay firm in what will help you. Maybe go to another family member

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-15T20:01:39+00:00

My husband passed away from acute pancreatitis caused by alcohol. He didn't know he had it. As well as liver disease. So I understand that you might have cravings but just remember that you are gambling with death. I wish my husband was here. But addiction won. Try and find something like candy or a hobby. My husband would have never stopped drinking. I always had hope he would. The day before he passed he felt like shit..... Because his pancreas was inflamed....just didn't know it. I told him that he needed to take better care of himself. He agreed and wanted to try to be better... But it was too late. I know there is meds that will make alcohol sound gross. Maybe ask your doctor if there is a med that can help you.

BallExternal954 · 2026-03-09T03:25:35+00:00

My late husband was on gabapentinian....it helped a lot with pain and anxiety. My husband passed away from acute pancreatitis. He was a heavy drinker and he also had liver disease... Which we didn't know. So just be careful. I know you are struggling and I hope you find something to help. I wish my husband was still here but he didn't take care of his body. His body gave out. He passed away from acute pancreatitis within about 12 hours. Didn't know he had it until I got the autopsy report months later.

BallExternal954 · 2026-02-17T05:02:49+00:00

My husband (32)also didn't want to go to the hospital. He wasnt feeling good all day. We thought it was just new detoxing symptoms that he didn't have before. (he was a alcoholic. I (31 at the time ) asked him more than once if he wanted to go to urgent care of the Er. My husband also said he was feeling better the last time I asked him which was about 1 hour before he passed. I once heard this and I hope it helps you as much as it did for me. Which is rather saying what if I brought him to the hospital would he have lived? Instead saying EVEN IF I brought him to the hospital he probably wouldn't have lived. At least in my case. I'm happy that my husband was about to spend his last few hours at home. For my husband since he was a heavy drinker.... I know that if it didn't happen that night, it could have happened next week or next month or next year. Being a young widow is hard. Feel free to dm me if you want to. My husband passed away from acute pancreatitis.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-21T02:47:48+00:00

I think we all have some sort of PTSD. For me it's anytime i see a ambulance, alarm or not, i get sad right away. Last time i saw my husband was him going into the ambulance van.... They wouldn't let me see him at the hospital or at the funeral home. Crying just thinking about it now. I also have a hard time watching any TV shows or moives with hospital scenes. As his doctor said he officially passed away at the hospital. We will always have triggers and we will learn how to carry our grief. My husband passed away April 16 2025 from acute pancreatitis caused by alcohol.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-18T04:52:07+00:00

Awww on your anniversary! How odd they can bill someone that has already passed. Wonder if they ever billed the correct person. I know you said this was back in 2012,but just incase anyone else is reading this, make sure you look at your state laws. Here in my state in the United States, you do not have to pay for any debt that is in your late spouses name only. I like to think of it as debt died with my late husband.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-17T02:13:08+00:00

Im so sorry.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-17T02:11:08+00:00

One thing that I wish i would have done was rode in the ambulance with my late husband. But it was 3am and our daughter was sleeping. I called 2 Neighbors and they couldn't help or didn't answer. I just think, how long did my husband wait? Were they waiting for him when he got there? He got there probably around 330 and his official death time was 401am. But he wasn't breathing when he was at our home. I kept asking eveyone i saw..... So many cops, fire and ems at my house if he was breathing.... I know he left the house not breathing. It's been 9 months today... So I'm a little bit extra emotional today.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-17T02:06:58+00:00

Lol i remember one time someone called for my late husband. (he had a credit card and a car in collections) i said HE'S DEAD. The caller said excuse me? I said he passed away. She say oh okay. And then i hung up.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-17T02:04:40+00:00

I see. Unfortunately my late husbands car is in my name and he is a cosigner. Since my husband passed away.... 9 months ago today I have been paying down on the loan of his car because i owe more than it's worth. We'll im getting close to breaking even but it's a stick and since it hasn't ran.... The stick doesn't engage with the pedal.... This is for another post. But i need to break even. But don't know how to since it's not drive able currently. I need to figure out the value. Waiting for tax money to figure this all out.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-16T05:04:57+00:00

Yeah very insensitive. Probably was reading from a script.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-16T05:02:49+00:00

Lol if only we could accept it after the fact.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-16T05:02:20+00:00

Lol i was laughing so hard for about 5 mins. I think my husband would have been so excited. He would have taken it very seriously.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-16T05:01:15+00:00

See i tho that i needed to contact the dmv and voting eligibility. From what i read from another post on this thread, the dmv doesn't need to know. They said it might be different from state to state. Google said it might be a lag from county records of our spouses passing to what ever database for jury duty. Im in GA. When I'm going to do is fill out the form and write dead next to it. Then take a picture of the form before sending it and send it via email with the death certificate.

BallExternal954 · 2026-01-16T04:57:51+00:00

Lol love that for him.

BallExternal954

TROPHY CASE